The new girl
by DeLePwned
Summary: Sookie, a nerdy but well-liked girl in her late 20's, is getting over a bad break up with her cheating Ex.  She eventually finds a new place to stay when she moves in with three  gorgeous  men.  Inspired by the tv series.  AH.  OOC.
1. Chapter 1

SO. I am VERY new to writing fanfiction. Took almost an hour to publish just this first chapter! anyway, someone recommended that I find a beta reader? Not exactly sure how that works, so any tips would be QUITE welcome! This story was inspired by watching new girl, the tv series.. but for legal purposes: I own nothing.

the new girl

"So why did you leave your last place of residence?" Sookie sat up a bit straighter in her seat, uncomfortable to say the least.

"I'm not really comfortable discussing it, at this time." Simaltaneously, all three of the gorgeous men sitting in front of her crossed their arms. Claude, the breathtaking man with silky black hair practically scowled at this response.

"Not comfortable, as in, you murdered your previous roommates and are still using their credit cards?" Sookie sighed. Here she thought Claudine (Claude's equally good looking sister) was her fairy godmother for suggesting renting out a room from her older brother. They might look the same, but Claudine definitely was the more charming of the two professional models.

"Bill. EX boyfriend." She paused, almost hoping that would be a good enough explanation for the interview. It wasn't the case. Sookie took a deep breath before continuing. "We'd been together about six years, living in the same house for five of those years. Anyway, last week, I decided to try my hand at seduction." Sookie pushed her thick framed glasses up the bridge of her nose, hopefully emphasizing seduction was a bit out of her element. She stole a glance at the trio of pure sex, she definitely had their attention. Sookie smirked as she realized it must have been the word "seduction" that had them hanging on her every word.

"He thought I was out with the girls, so I was going to surprise him. I didn't call first. I just bought a short trench coat, took off all my clothes, had an awkward cab ride trying to keep decent in just a coat, and rang the door bell. Bill was still in his boxers, so I just figured I had woke him up. Walked past him into the living room, pretending I was someone else, someone MUCH sexier, of course. Right as I let the coat drop to the floor, another woman walked out of our bedroom." Sookie Blushed and blinked back her tears at the same time. "So I've been living on Claudine's couch, then she recommended you guys, and here I am. No murders, unfortunately." She snuck a finger underneath her right lense to brush away a tear.

"Well don't cry." Claude still seemed as cold as ever, but her tears were starting to shake his resolve. "Alcide here knows your pain, he got dumped, too." The man sitting next to Claude shot up in his seat.

"I didn't get dumped..!" He shot a look at Sookie, she smiled slightly, hoping to comfort the man. He too had black hair, but sexy green eyes instead of Claude's chocolatey brown. He was fit but Sookie wasn't sure he was a model. His hands were rough like he actually worked for a living. "I didn't get dumped. Besides, it was about six months ago." Sookie nodded.

"I'm sorry, Sookie? Is it? We need to talk this over. Excuse us." It was the first time the blonde man spoke. He stood and the other two men followed him down the hall. It was possible HE was a model. He was the tallest of the three, incredibly sexy, and had the most beautiful blue eyes Sookie had ever seen. For a minute she thought he could be Claude's model boyfriend. Models date models right? The only reason she figured they weren't together was because another man sat between them on the couch.

Sookie stood up to take in the apartment. The building was once a factory and had a great portion of it renovated into large apartments. She loved it. It was very modern/contemporary. Lots of light. The living room was enormous with an open floor plan, but the men of this apartment had added a lot of structure with clever use of a sectional and bookcases. The kitchen had the best name brands of stainless steel appliances and beautiful tall wooden cabinets. Brick walls, but the place still felt very warm. She knew she'd feel heartbroken all over again if they decided she couldn't live there, and unfortunately, the odds were stacked up against her.

Why on earth would three gorgeous men want a girl like her to live with them? She definitely didn't look like the kind of girl they'd ever want to be seen around. Sookie caught her reflection in a mirror and suddenly wished she had dressed a bit nicer for this. Surrounded by models and here she was dressed in very worn out jeans, a pair of red converse sneakers, and a black t shirt that read "The Beets: Killer Tofu Tour '96". She pushed her thick black glasses back and tucked her wavy blonde hair back behind her ears. Yep. Had she known she'd be in the presence of such hotties she'd have definitely brought her A-game. She probably would have had better luck finding a roommate on Craig's list. Feeling hopeless, Sookie creeped silently down the hall to eavesdrop on their conversation.

"Well, Claudine vouches for her."

"I say no."

"Woah, woah. Let's think about this! Having a girl around the place might not be so bad. I mean, they smell nice. They're usually pretty clean. They fold things really cute.."

"What do we know about her? Nerdy blonde girl, dresses like she's twelve. How old is she, and just what does she do for a living? Can she even pay rent?"

"You won't know if you don't ask her, Eric." Before Sookie could react, or run back into the living room, the door swung open and Sookie's nose was practically touching the chest of the tall blonde's black t shirt. Her eyes drifted up his chest past his neck and chiseled jaw and into his startled blue eyes.

"Look, I know ya'll don't know me very well." She took a step back to give the sexy giant a bit of breathing room and also to address the other two tennants standing behind "eric" in the bathroom. "I'm a teacher, so i'll probably be bringing home a bunch of popsicle sticks, things like that. I am a very neat person, I love to cook, I won't be too noisy or anything because I'll most likely be reading. I'm pretty competitive, so don't challenge me to a game of Scrabble or Boggle!" They didn't seem amused. "But seriously. I'm really laid back, not a big complainer, and best of all, look at me. I'm just a polite, average girl, so when you guys feel like bringing home a hot date, I can be charming and in NO way intimidating!"

The blonde man seemed to relax a little, even smirked a bit. Claude still seemed bored. The other man with touseled black hair scratched the top of his head and stepped around the tall blonde blocking the doorway.

"Executive decision, you're in! I'm Alcide Herveaux." He extended his manly hand towards Sookie and she shook it as firmly as she could, causing the man to chuckle. "Well, you sort of know Claude already." Claude nodded. "This guy's Eric Northman. We've all known each other since college." Sookie smiled sweetly. Finally. She was starting fresh. New home, new roommates, new life.

Alcide's POV

"GOODMORNING!" Alcide practically jogged out of the hallway into the kitchen. The most amazing smells had been wafting to his room since he woke up.

"Mornin' Sookie, woah, what's all this?" The kitchen island was covered with a feast of breakfast foods. "It all smells amazing!" Alcide dropped his workboots on the ground and began buttoning up his shirt.

"Thanks, I got a text from Claudine saying it's Claude's birthday! Plus I noticed you both left super early for work Yesterday, so I figured you could both enjoy a hearty breakfast, r-right?" Alcide stopped buttoning to see why Sookie was studdering. She was biting her bottom lip and staring at his exposed chest. Alcide grinned, holding his chin higher as he buttoned slowly for her benefit. Blushing, she turned her attention to the kitchen cabinets. "Let me just get you a plate..."

Sookie handed Alcide a plate and turned back to her current task at hand. Alcide wasted no time in piling up large portions of eggs, hashbrowns, and sausage links onto his plate. He groaned in pleasure with the first bite.

"Best decision ever, ya know, letting you live here?" Sookie smiled warmly and he swallowed his next bite audibly. She poured him a fresh cup of coffee and Alcide pondered how easily he could fall in love with a woman like this. That morning she was still wearing her pajamas while making breakfast. Red and white flannel pj bottoms, and a small pink tanktop with a picture of a woman from the 50's holding a spatula; it read "I should be in the kitchen!". He smiled, not only because Sookie had a great sense of humor but because her breasts looked phenomenal in that top. She was very cute, thick black framed glasses and a messy blonde ponytail from her sleep.

Alcide sipped his coffee, observing his new roommate. The kitchen was still so new to her, but she wasn't half as clumsy as he figured she would be (based on her appearance). She expertly went from cabinet to drawer retrieving appropriate utensils and even hidden oven mitts! If she would reach for something, her leg would extend out gracefully, like a dancer. Watching her cook was practically breathtaking. That was something she definitely had over Debbie, his ex. Debbie wouldn't be caught dead in a kitchen.

"Alcide, can I ask you something?" He nodded his response (mouth full). "What do you do for a living? You're surely not a model with workboots like that, unless you're playing the Brawny man or something?"

"HA!" Alcide dropped his fork and laughed mostly to himself. "No no, Claude's the model around here. I run a surveying company with my old man. It's not very glamorous, I know."

"No, it's great! I love a man who works with his hands." He looked up from his almost empty plate and met her shimmering blue eyes. She blushed furiously, realizing what she had just said and turned quickly to the oven. One oven-mitt clad hand pulled out a tray of biscuits and the other grabbed a small ceramic bowl of sorts. She seemed so happy and at home Alcide thought she'd be better suited to being a chef.

"Whatcha got there?"

"Biscuits! Heads up!" He barely had time to react as Sookie tossed him a hot biscuit across the kitchen island. He caught it by reflex and juggled it about in his hands, not expecting it to be so warm. Sookie giggled and began to stir some pretty pink concoction in a new bowl.

"Thanks, but I meant the other thing." She dipped a finger in the pink stuff, licking it slowly and analyzing the taste. Alcide shifted in his seat. Was it warm in here? Must be the heat from the oven...

"It's a mini-cake for Claude's Birthday! I figured a "model" would be insulted with a FULL sized chocolate cake! Then again, I don't really know Claude at all, or 'any' of you for that matter (she mumbled)."

"He'll appreciate it, but he'll probably forget to thank you. When you're that goodlooking it's easy to forget your manners." Sookie nodded in agreement and Alcide took his dirty dishes to the sink beside her. He washed not only his utensils but began washing Sookie's used pans as well.

"Hey hey, I can get that! It was my mess after all."

"Least I could do, 'cher." Alcide winked and Sookie blushed. This girl was too easy to tease.

"What about Eric? What does he do for a living?" Alcide almost winced at the mention of his name. Was he jealous she was asking about him? Impossible. He wasn't even interested in Sookie, or was he?

"Eric. He's a club owner. Don't fall victim to his charms now cher, Northman's got a reputation for being a lady killer. Never seen him with the same girl twice if you know what I mean." Sookie nodded. "It takes a while to get used to him, he can be a dick, that might just be because he's from Sweden. Anyway, as long as you always take your clothes out the dryer when they're done, and don't use his stuff without asking ya'll should get along just fine. Deep down he's a nice enough guy."

"Clothes out the dryer, good to know." Sookie finished icing the small cake and swirled her finger around the bowl collecting a mass of pink around her index finger. Right as she was about to lick the icing off, Alcide grabbed hold of her wrist. He brought her hand up to his chin and placed the single finger into his mouth, slowly sucking the icing away and gently caressing Sookie's finger with his warm tongue.

"Mmm, perfect dessert to a perfect meal." He held Sookie's hand captive in front of his face and she stared at him wide eyed and slack jawed. When Alcide snickered, it shocked Sookie enough to pull her hand free.

"I- I had better deliver this cake to Claude then!" Alcide was still smiling in smug satisfaction from seeing her deep blush (and hardened nipples poking through her small tank top). He checked his watch and practically ran to put on his boots. "Thanks again for helping with the dishes! Have fun at work Alcide!"

"Thanks for breakfast, Sook!" Alcide took off without locking the front door.


	2. Chapter 2

Sookie's POV

Sookie was desperately trying to calm her nerves and catch her breath. Alcide was such a hunk, that was definitely the best word to describe him. She could tell he wasn't coming on to her during their breakfast. For the most part it seemed like the most casual conversation in the world, but the look he gave her as he made love to her finger had Sookie more than flustered.

She smoothed the imaginary wrinkles down the front of her pajama bottoms and took a deep breath before grabbing the tiny cake behind her and heading down the hall to Claude's room. That's when it hit her...she wasn't even sure WHICH room was Claude's! Hers was the first (practically empty) room on the left, the next room on the left was the enormous gym-like bathroom/locker room, so it had to be either of the two rooms on the right, or the door at the very end of the hall. She figured the door at the end had to be the Master Suite, but was Claude the "master" of the apartment?

Biting her lip, she decided now was the time for action..she couldn't afford to wait in this hall all day, she had to hop in the shower and get to Bill's house before he got home from the gym. Three doors, two roommates, why was she so afraid of accidentally seeing Eric? Was it because he had voted against letting her stay? She figured it was more likely because she didn't want to get his hopes up with a tasty cake only to say it was for someone else.

The first door on the right (across from Sookie's room) was slightly ajar, so she kicked it open a bit with her foot. Peering in she found dirty clothes scattered across the wood floors, a discarded pizza box on the table in the corner, a 32" (probably) tv mounted to a wall across from a king sized bed adorned with red sheets. The place was vacant. Alcide's Bedroom.

She tip-toed down the hall to the next bedroom. Such a large hallway, in fact, all the bedrooms were enormous! Her room was definitely the smallest, it was probably meant to be an office, but a queen sized bed would fit perfectly and still give her tons of space. Sookie scowled, realizing she still needed to purchase a new bed. She added bed-buying to her checklist for that day.

Right as she stepped in front of the next bedroom door, the nob jiggled and Sookie held her breath. Luckily, Claude stepped out. Topless.

"Oh good, you're awake! Here." She thrust the small chocolate cake towards him enthusiastically. Claude looked from the cake back to Sookie. Neither of them moved. Sookie blushed: 1. Because Claude was topless, and QUITE muscular in all the right places. 2. Because she just realized Pink might not have been the best choice for icing color. Would he be offended? Was pink too gay for him? She prayed he wouldn't assume she was calling him a fairy. He quirked an eyebrow and slowly took the cake from Sookie's hands. She sighed in relief, always overthinking things...

"Claudine texted me last night, told me it was your birthday. I made breakfast. Well, I made a LOT of breakfast, help yourself." Claude half-way smiled and Sookie stood on her toes to quickly kiss his cheek. "Happy Birthday!"

Before she could bask in the mortification of what she had just done, Sookie bounded towards her bedroom to sift through her only suitcase to randomly select her outfit for the day. Since time was of the essence, Sookie set her clothes aside, grabbing her handful of travel soaps and conditioners and headed for the bathroom.

Their bathroom was actually more of a locker room. There was a set of lockers next to the bathroom entrance, two private shower stalls, two bathroom stalls (though only toilet paper in one stall), one gigantic sink with two separate faucets, a couple of urinals, and on the far corner of the bathroom was a giant jacuzzi tub that could probably accomodate four people!

Pushing open the first shower stall's curtain, Sookie noticed it was actually a deep shower with two separate sections. Perfect. The first section was obviously to disrobe so your belongings and towel wouldn't get wet. She stripped down without a second thought and leapt into the shower, not wanting to waste any more time. The last thing she wanted to do was actually confront that weasel, Bill. Sookie turned the appropriate knobs and reached her naked arm out the curtain for a towel. Unfortunately, Sookie realized all too late that men didn't need LARGE towels.

Sighing, she gave her hair a good once over before trying to wrap the scrap of absorbent material around her waist. She inched it up and down her body a few inches here and there before deciding she was decent 'enough' to make a break for it. Her room was just around the corner anyway, what were the odds anyone would even see her? Thrusting open the curtain, Sookie found herself directly across from a very tired looking (and half-naked) Eric Northman.

He didn't look sleepy for long.

Eric's POV

Eric rubbed the sleep out of his eyes before they settled on a soaking wet Sookie Stackhouse. He stopped moving into the locker room altogether, fully occupying the doorway. Surprise will do that to you.

His first impression of her was that she was a bit spastic or geeky, but still had quite a bit of promise hidden beneath her "plain" clothing. Nothing could escape his expert eye, including the Stackhouse girl's kicking curves. Seeing her with just a towel (hardly) covering those curves had left him immobilized. Eric fought the urge to be his sly and charming self, wondering just how many lines it would take to get her to 'throw in the towel'.

He suddenly had no idea how to address the situation. Almost naked, she appeared to be a woman owning his every fantasy, but this wasn't exactly the "Sookie Stackhouse" he had met a couple days before; who knows how she'd react to his seduction. More importantly, she was a new roommate. Whatever he said at that exact moment would become a crucial factor in determining their "home" relationship. Hell, this would probably be their first real conversation since she moved in.

His eyes became uncontrollable as they travelled up and down her body, following water patterns down her soft skin and disappearing between that mind-blowing cleavage. He waited for her to speak, knowing whatever he would end up saying would definitely be the 'wrong' thing to say.

"Umm, Sorry for borrowing the towel." Eric blinked, not really expecting an apology. It WAS his towel.

"No problem." He didn't mind. Why didn't he mind? He had chewed out Alcide for borrowing lesser items than towels. He didn't even OFFER women he bedded at the apartment the luxury of bathing there, much less (HIS) towel usage.

"So I've made tons of breakfast, eggs, sausage, biscuits, hashbrowns..." she started walking right towards him. "So just, help yourself." Her eyes never left his as she sauntered sexily to him, or was he just imagining that? He lost all ability to breathe. Was she crazy? Dripping wet, deep eye contact, "help yourself"? Crazy Sookie. He simply quirked an eyebrow in response. Realization set in and she blushed furiously.

"Help yourself to the BREAKFAST, is what I meant.." She trailed off. Soon Sookie was standing just a few inches in front of Eric as she nervously motioned for him to step aside. Eric smirked. She was cute, very cute. They shuffled awkwardly, running into each other a few times before Eric finally was out of her way enough for her to book it past him and into her bedroom.

Maybe a new roommate wasn't such a bad idea.


	3. Chapter 3

SOOKIE'S POV

Sookie ran to her room, slamming the door behind her. She probably looked like some sort of two-bit hussy with just that sorry excuse of a towel! Sookie shook her head and imagined all the things her Gran would say if she knew some STRANGER had seen her practically naked!

Gran. Now there was a woman full of surprises. Sookie had called her the day before to keep her updated on the living situation, and instead of being disappointed in Sookie for living with THREE men (out of wedlock, of course), she actually seemed THRILLED with the idea. Sookie couldn't believe her ears when Gran even suggested flaunting the three gorgeous young men in front of Bill to "make him squirm a little" or "see what he's missing".

Remembering her strict time frame, Sookie discarded the "washcloth" and reached for the pile of clothes she had set aside for the day. She had barely slid her underwear on before more bad news found her: she had left the bathroom without grabbing her things. The most important of those things would be her bra.

It wasn't exactly her fault. Eric Northman was on display wearing just a pair of boxer-briefs. Very distracting. Besides, Sookie wasn't about to bend over in just that towel.

"Argh! YOU HAVE GOT. TO. BE. KIDDING ME!" Sookie took a quick glance to the lone suitcase in her giant room, but she knew full and well the one and only bra she had brought with her since leaving Bill was still inside that shower stall; the same shower her sexy roommate Eric was now occupying.

Sookie zipped up her jeans and threw her t-shirt on (sans bra). It was a light grey shirt with a running wizard on it labeled "fantasy football". The shirt always reminded her of her brother Jason.

Taking deep calming breaths, Sookie walked barefoot back to the bathroom she was once quite fond of. The shower was running and her heart was racing.

"Umm, Eric?" Sookie gripped the tiny towel she had borrowed from him. "I'm sorry to interrupt you, but I kind of left in a hurry earlier and left some things in the shower." Sookie waited a few seconds but got no response. "Eric?"

A bombardment of her clothes came flying over the curtain, the bra in question conveniently landing on her head. Sookie was mortified. Her most beautiful roommate, whom she hardly knew, had not only seen the great majority of her body but had handled her unmentionables, too.

She grumbled her thanks to Eric and tossed her pajamas into her locker, slamming it shut to convey her aggravation for his lack of manners. Just as she was about to hang his towel back on it's rightful hook, he finally spoke.

"Oh Sookie, dear?" he called sweetly. She stepped cautiously towards his shower.

"Y-yes?" Was this some sort of trap, or worse, was he going to prank her somehow?

"Aren't you forgetting something else?" Sookie was stunned. What else did she need besides her bra? Before she could figure out what he was speaking of, she heard familiar squeaking as the shower stopped. The curtain was ripped back and Sookie nearly jumped.

"EEEP!" Her eyes squeezed shut and she shielded his body from her with his own towel. What was he thinking, stepping out completely naked like that? She wondered if she was actually glad she didn't catch a glimpse of him entirely of it was more disappointing that she didn't. The tiny towel was ripped from her grasp but Sookie kept her eyes shut tightly with her head turned slightly to the side. Were all men this showy of their bodies, or was it just her roommates? He coughed so she cracked open an eye to make sure he was decent.

Eric in boxers had nothing on post-shower towel-clad Eric. He brought both of his arms up as he brushed his dripping blonde locks back behind his ears and Sookie gulped audibly. Biting her lip, Sookie memorized each flexing muscle from his biceps all the way down to the offensive towel. Even his strong calf muscles were panty-droppingly sexy.

He coughed again and Sookie snapped back to reality. Her eyes met his and suddenly she knew what she had left in the shower. Eric was wearing her thick glasss on the tip of his nose; smirking. If those glasses weren't steamed up from his recent shower they sure as hell could have been fogged from the ragged breaths Sookie was taking to keep her cool.

"I like your shirt." She glanced down since she had completely forgotten what she was even wearing and realized how hard her nipples had become while gawking at Eric.

She had had enough of his teasing. Sookie collected herself and with fire in her eyes stepped right up to the Swedish sex god before her. Standing on her toes, she reached up and plucked her frames from his perfect face. She dropped back onto her heels with a defiant smile, and thanked him promptly before marching back to her room, bra in hand.


	4. Chapter 4

Sorry that Chapter 3 was super short, just felt like posting what I had already completed while writing This bit of magic for you here… 

Sookie spent the rest of her morning breaking into her old home filling up suitcases and boxes full of her belongings; mostly clothes, books, framed family photos, dvds, and her super-expensive home theater surround sound system she had bought last year. Bill would be furious the minute he'd find it missing.

A good portion of her last paycheck was used to buy new pillows, a bedding set and various cosmetic/hygiene products. She purchased a new bed, but it wouldn't be delivered until the next day.

Deciding not to waste the day away feeling sorry for herself, Sookie built a large fort in her room out of her bedspreads, blankets, suitcases, and boxes. It would have to do until she had a _real_ bed. Next order of business was to set up her surround sound system in the living room. The hardest part was actually mounting the speakers to the brick walls around the room. As she was bending over attaching the receiver to the back of the television, Alcide and Claude both walked in the front door carrying boxes of pizza

"Um, need any help there, Sookie?" She sprung up quickly, brushing the hair out of her face.

"Nah, I'm cool. Is that pizza?" Alcide genuinely smiled while offering her a plate.

"Claude's birthday. He didn't really feel like going out, even though it's a Friday night." She accepted the plate and sat at the kitchen counter waiting her turn to help herself.

"We can go out another time. I worked an 80 hour work-week. I just want to come home and relax, and eat some of this pizza." Claude slapped three slices onto his plate. Weren't models supposed to count calories?

"80 hours?" Sookie leapt up and leaned into the fridge. "What would you boys like to drink?" All three of them decided on beers with their pizza.

"I also own and manage a strip-club. It's not like I'll be able to model forever." Claude brought out his keys and used his bottle-opener keychain to open both his and Sookie's beers. Supposedly, Alcide was a big boy and could open his own.

"Smart. There's some job security in having other people take off their clothes for money!" Sookie peeled off a piece of pepperoni from her cheesey slice and ate it playfully.

"So Sook, what did you do today?" She hurriedly swallowed the bite of pizza she was chewing on to answer Alcide's question. She thought it best to pretend nothing had happened between her and Mr. Northman in the early morning.

"Well, FIRST I went home to gather up a bunch of my things; clothes, shoes, ooo, and did I mention our fancy-schmancy surround sound system?" Sookie gestured to the electronics she had been setting up when they walked through the door. Alcide and Claude made appropriate "oo"'s and "ahh"'s to her handy work.

"Buuut, I had to leave half of the stuff I packed because my ex came home a bit earlier than expected…" both men winced. "Yeah, AND he was with the same woman who saw me naked. Good thing I parked my car around back. I had to sneak out my bedroom window." Alcide stood up to get Sookie another well-deserved beer.

"See, now that's a good idea," Claude stood as if making a big announcement. "It's my birthday, and I wanna get drunk. With SOOKIE. My new roommate."

"I dunno if that's such a good idea, Claude. She just got out of a bad relationship, alcohol's probably not the answer."

"NO. That's a GREAT idea!" Sookie was sick of crying alone every night, and getting shit-faced with two guys she barely knew seemed like the perfect type of distraction she needed. "Better yet, we can all get drunk in my FORT!"

Who knew that you just had to MENTION the word "fort" to these guys and they'd be racing for Sookie's room..? 

Eric's POV (6 hr's later) 

"Guys?" Eric walked cautiously into his apartment. He had tried to persuade Claude into celebrating his birthday at Eric's club since it was a Friday night, but the man insisted on relaxing at home instead of mooching free drinks all night.

Somewhere in that six hour time span his plans must have changed because he had sent Eric a plethora of unintelligible txt messages. He was definitely drunk somewhere.

He walked through the darkened living room and tripped on what seemed to be a discarded pizza box on the kitchen floor while making his way towards the only source of light in their home: Sookie's bedroom.

Eric practically held his breath as he nudged her door further open with his foot, who knows what ungodly things his two (drunk) best friends would be doing to her on her first real night here. He was not expecting them to be laughing hysterically in a makeshift fort.

He tip-toed into the room past an obstacle course of empty beer bottles and Sookie's discarded jeans and kneeled by the blanketed entrance.

"Pffft, that's ri-DiculOshh Shookie! Schook? Sook?" Yep, Claude was drunk. "Nicknames!"

"Yes!" Sookie was equally drunk as she squealed with excitement. "I declare, we all have nicknames…BASED ON…" there was a long pause, "theeeeeeeee… Wendy's value menu!" Silence…followed soon after by extreme laughter from a drunken Claude and Alcide.

"No no, we can do this!" Eric almost laughed outside her fort. She was actually trying to sell them on this idea. "Claude's the skinny one, so you're gonna be named 'Side Salad' (said in an exaggerated drunken Gangsta' tone). I can be 'Baked PO-tato"…OOH, and Alcide, YOU can be 'CHILLI-BOWL'!" All three of them howled with laughter.

"Yeah? And what about Eric?" There was a pause as Sookie thought about it, then, in as deep a man-voice as she could muster:

"This here FROSTY. He don't say much." Uproarious laughter. He took that as his cue to enter the fort.

"ERIC!" Sookie sprung back, having been caught joking at his expense.

"Sookie, I like what you've done with the place." Sookie blushed. It really was an impressive fort (especially for a girl). It was large enough for Alcide to be lying almost fully across it; Sookie and Claude sat cross-legged in the back two corners of the fort with half a case of beer sitting between them.

Eric tried desperately to tear his eyes away from the stunning, and inebriated, beauty. Her blonde hair was once pinned up in a clip, but the majority of it was spilling over her shoulders in a beautiful drunkenly tangled mess of curls. She was wearing the most bizarre pajamas he had ever seen. Her tank top was the top-portion of Wonder Woman's costume, printed all the way to the belt, and her bottoms were the blue panties (bottom of the costume) with white stars. Probably supposed to be funny or cute, but Eric was strangely turned on. That—plus the way she nervously bit her bottom lip, he didn't stand a chance.

"Yea, I ordered a bed, but it won't be delivered until tomorrow." She guiltily handed a half-empty bottle of rum that rested between her knees over to Claude.

"Have a great birthday man?" Claude smiled much brighter than usual before taking a large swig of the rum. "That was a yes."

Alcide was sprawled out across the fort and was drifting 'suspiciously' in-and-out of consciousness. Eric knew he was planning on 'conveniently' falling asleep in Sookie's room so he'd have a nice excuse to sleep there with her, or possibly do more than sleep.

The girl didn't _seem_ to be the type to jump into bed with a man she barely knew, but she did just get out of a long relationship. Alcide was still healing after getting the shit kicked out of his heart by that obnoxious bitch, Debbie. They could probably both use a little meaningless sex, but Eric was hesitant to let Alcide be the one to give it to the beautiful mixture of Wonder Woman and Clark Kent. Sharing a bunk with Alcide in college gave Eric a good idea of how well he performed; sounded like a rescue crew trying to communicate with a stranded miner: "Are you okay?" –gulp- "Yea…" "Are you okay?" "yeah…". Sookie deserved better.

"Let me get this guy outta here for you." Eric flipped the sheet/entry way of the fort out of the way and began dragging Alcide out onto the wood floor by his wrist.

"Woah, woah, Eric. I'm Cool! It's cool man." Sure it was.

"You gotta sleep this off Alcide." He leaned closer to Alcide's ear and whispered, "You're no good to her like this, anyway." Claude and Sookie stared in awe as Eric hoisted Alcide over his shoulders and wore him like scarf out into the hallway.

Sookie's POV

Who knew Eric was so strong? Alcide was NOT a small man, and Eric picked him up and tossed him over his shoulders like a child! She tried to shake herself out of the sexual haze she always found herself drowned in whenever Eric was around. Glancing over at Claude she noticed he was staring at her strangely. She fidgeted about, uncomfortable under his gaze. Could he tell how badly she wanted Eric? Was she drooling that bad?

"What?" Claude's eyes narrowed on her.

"Did you use my conditioner?" Sookie almost laughed. She was so sure he was onto her little crush on Eric.

"What? No." Claude didn't seem convinced. He pushed the case of beer between them roughly out of the way, smelling her hair.

"Wha-WHAT ARE YOU DOING?" Claude was practically pushing Sookie back as he buried his face in her mass of hair over her left shoulder.

"Lotus Berry Relax, Lotus Berry Relax! I can smell it on your hair!" She started pushing his drunken self off of her, laughing between words.

"Then FINE! Stop smelling my hair!"

"Sook, do you know how much this stuff costs?" He had pinned her down at this point, his chin and warm breath tickling her neck.

"Okay! Claude! I didn't use your conditioner!"

"THEN WHY DOES YOUR HAIR LOOK SO BABY SOFT?" He was practically lying on top of her before the real tickling began. Sookie practically screamed as his fingers savagely tickled her abdomen.

"FINE! CLAUDE, I ran out of shampoo, and I used your conditioner!" Claude siezed his assault, removing his face from her hair and gasped audibly. "We are talking about conditioner, right?"

"You used it as SHAMPOO? It's for moisture, Sook, not for cleaning! I can't belie- I Can't believe we're friends!" She couldn't tell if he was really furious or simply drunk and playful…

"So we're friends now?" Sookie looked up into the eyes of the gay man atop her. They stared at each other for a while before Claude got that crazy look again.

"Give it back." Now she was confused.

"Give you what back?" Claude straddled Sookie's thighs and sat back onto her lap, running his fingers wildly through her hair.

"Give me it back!" The onslaught continued and Sookie could barely breathe through her laughter.

"CLAUDE! HAHA, THINK ABOUT WHAT YOU'RE DOING!"

"I'm squeezing it out of your hair!" Sookie kicked and tried to push his hands away from her hair, but he was incredibly strong.

"You're squeezing it out of my-?" A man clearing his throat caused them both to stop wrestling. Eric was kneeling at the fort entrance with that same sexy quirked eyebrow….

Why couldn't they just have a normal conversation, in a normal setting, without Sookie making a fool of herself…?


	5. Chapter 5

Hello All! I have another mini-chapter of Eric and Sookie getting to know one another… Just a little bit of fluff to hold you over until the next mega-chapter! Enjoy- 

Ch. 5 

Sookie tossed and turned flinging her limbs into various positions trying to find some sort of comfort. It had only been an hour since Alcide was hauled out of her room, Claude exited gracefully after molesting Sookie's scalp, and she had humiliated herself (yet again) in front of Eric.

Eric was actually one of the reasons she was losing sleep. At first Sookie would close her eyes and replay the images of him wearing only that tiny towel around his waist while flashing her that sexy smirk she loved so much. Then the fantasies would fade into the reality of how foolish and immature she acted whenever Eric was around. Sookie smacked her palm to her face realizing Eric probably only associated with super sexy sophisticated women, like lingerie models, college educated lingerie models! ..probably. Sookie was beneath him in all aspects, except literally lying beneath him, where she actually wanted to be.

She did a summersault out of her fort and jumped up to move around her room. Perhaps the increased blood flow from exercising would take her mind off of her enticing yet unobtainable roommate. After about three forward lunges around her bedroom, depressing thoughts of Bill resurfaced. Sookie had listened to one of the four voicemails he had left her that day and it practically brought her to tears. The highlights of his message included a detailed description of how poor Sookie was in bed, how embarassing it was to be seen around her in public, and how the rest of her life would be spent alone because no man would ever take interest in a used up 2nd grade teacher with absolutely nothing to offer.

Grunting in frustration, Sookie tugged at handfulls of her blonde hair. She couldn't understand how much she could cry over a man she KNEW wasn't worth the tears! It was obvious she wouldn't be getting any sleep any time soon, so she threw on a large t-shirt and tip-toed down the hallway into the kitchen.

Her fingers gently caressed the brick wall as she blindly sought out the light switch. As the room filled with light she almost cringed at the mess her and the boys had left behind. She picked up the pizza box from the floor and tossed their used paper plates in the trash. The beer bottles could be tossed in the morning since she didn't trust herself to throw them quietly enough for her roommates to sleep through, especially with her current Bill annoyances. She checked the large freezer and pouted when she didn't find any icecream. Of course there wouldn't be any tasty desserts, these boys were all fantastically in shape! Her shoulders slumped as she rummaged through the kitchen for anything resembling comfort food. She settled for a bag of popcorn.

Sookie held her breath hoping the popping from the microwave wouldn't wake anyone up. She didn't appreciate being woken up at almost four in the morning by inconsiderate roomies, and Claudine did it almost every night—er, morning, while Sookie crashed on her couch. Yep, she would be burried up to her eyeballs in used tissues and Claudine would kick open the front door, groping and undressing whatever man had caught her eye that day. At least she'd remember to wave to Sookie as she sheep-dogged her next sexual conquest towards her bedroom.

Sookie pushed her thickly framed glasses back up the bridge of her nose smiling. Claudine was a great friend and Sookie admired her ability to find romance in even the most brief encounters with the opposite sex! She grabbed the finished bag of popcorn gently by it's corners with her fingertips and grabbed a bowl from the cabinet, making her way to the living room.

She was lucky enough to spot her favorite movie amongst their expansive DVD collection and wasted no time in loading it into the game console to watch. Her copy of the same movie was currently buried in a box holding up Sookie's Fort. 10 minutes into the film and Sookie began tossing Kernals into the air and catching them with her mouth. She was so focused on her new favorite sport she didn't hear Eric's feet padding down the hallway towards her.

"The 13th Warrior?"

"JESUS CHRIST, SHEPHERD OF JUDEA!" Sookie jumped from her cross legged position tossing her bowl of popcorn into the air. Eric caught the bowl easily, but the Damage was already done.

EPOV

She was adorable. Her hair was even more drunkenly tangled. Popcorn was everywhere, but mostly piled on her lap. She was wearing a large men's t shirt that read "That's What She Said". It only took a second for her face to turn bright red from embarassment.

Eric walked around the couch and scooped most of the popcorn off the sectional and back into her discarded bowl, and held the bowl towards her so she could dump her collection of popcorn into it, too. Eric's eyes almost bulged out of his head as she stood up holding the corners of her long shirt up to her waist. It only took a second for her to dump her popcorn back into the bowl, but in that second he got a great glimpse of the tops of her smooth, tan thighs and those sexy Wonder Woman panties. It wasn't until she flopped back down into the couch before he realized he wasn't really breathing. Perhaps "adorable" wasn't really the best word to describe this minx.

Was it really possible that she could have _no_ idea how she affected the men around her? He smirked as he took a seat beside her, checking her out again from the corner of his eye. She was still blushing and biting her bottom lip. She probably _barely_ realized she had flashed her new roommate. Sookie tried in vain to tug her long shirt further down her thighs. She was extremely beautiful. Eric had yet to see her wear makeup, but she somehow always seemed to be glowing. Sookie didn't seem to own any designer clothes, which was odd since Eric was sure she was Claudine's friend and that girl didn't speak unless it was about fashion.

"So I thought all girls watched Dirty Dancing after a bad break up?" Sookie laughed heartily before lightly clasping her hand over her mouth.

"I actually love that movie," she whispered, "Nobody keeps Baby in a corner!" She giggled softly and Eric had a hard time fighting back his smirk. "Nah, I uh- couldn't sleep. This is one of my favorites, actually."

"I love this movie, too." Eric found himself whispering back to her. Neither one wanted to wake their roommates, enjoying the private moment between themselves.

"Oh that's right, you're Swedish, er..so I've heard!" He turned his head towards her as she spoke and Sookie nervously avoided the eye contact. "Well, of course you are! Look at you! Such a big, strapping, VIKING of a man!" She was attempting a joke, but Eric didn't correct her.

"You've asked about me then?" Sookie looked away again, smiling.

"Of course I did. My Gran requested background info on all of my new roommates in case I go missing. Of course she'd prefer it if you were all gay, as not to take advantage of a young lady in the city." Eric took the opportunity to tease her some more. Making this girl blush was addictive! He inched towards her on the couch until his knee rested atop her exposed thigh and his face was mere centimeters away from hers; his nose softly grazing her cheek.

"What makes you so sure I'm not gay?" he whispered. Sookie's eyes widened in surprise, or fear? Her blush was back and deeper than ever.

"Um, Alcide? He said you're a very skilled womanizer." Eric stoned his features to hide his disdain for Alcide at that moment. Why the hell was he trying to cockblock him anyway? It's not as though Eric was trying to pursue the new roommate, or was he? Eric could only smile reassuringly. "But, I don't know, Eric. I've yet to see you bring a lady home. Then again, I've only lived here about three days!"

"And What do _you_ think of me Sookie?" Eric slowly pushed a lock of her hair behind her ear and continued running his fingers through her hair. Eric's new goal was to stain Sookie's face permanantly pink. Sookie gulped, playing with the ends of her grey t-shirt.

"Well, you're obviously quite the flirt." He continued running his fingertips through her hair, waiting for her to continue. "And, you only live once, so if meaningless hook-ups with super gorgeous girls makes you happy, then go for it! And you're young and pretty," She risked eye contact again, and Eric smirked "…and successful, so no doubt women flock to a guy like you!" He was already so close, but he leaned impossibly closer, his warm breath on her cheek. "I'm not really too interested in those qualities, though." Sookie took a deep breath. "But, hey! It really doesn't matter what "I" think of you, it's what you think of yourself, right?"

Eric smirked. She was kind of babbling, but she was honest to say the least. He pushed a larger portion of her wavy blonde hair back over her shoulder before removing a piece of popcorn from her hair and tossing it into his mouth. Her blush returned.

"Well, you most certainly SOUND like a teacher." Sookie smiled. Eric eased away from her and settled back into the couch, turning his attention to the tv. She had pretty much told him she wasn't interested. It'd be best not to jump into bed with your fuck-hot roommate, anyway. She'd just get attached, or emotional and jealous, and then you'd have awkward moments in the laundry room and kitchen. Sex was off the table, but he was sure sex with Sookie would be great on their dining room table. Still, Eric liked teasing her. "Sookie the school teacher with an obsession for Vikings."

"I'm not obsessed."

"I am." Eric's eyes left the tv to connect with her bewildered deep blue eyes instead. He pulled a sleeve up over his bicep to reveal a tattoo of a blonde warrior-like woman. "Valkyrie, a _chooser_ of the slain. Just a small tribute to my heritage." Sookie's eyes widened.

"Valkyrie? Like the club? That's YOUR club?" Sookie sat up excited while Eric grinned.

"Have you ever been?" She nodded but suddenly looked away, biting her lip. "What? You didn't like the club?" She shook her head.

"Oh, no, it's not like that. I don't want to get anyone in trouble, but there's just this one bartender there that's a bit...forward, towards me." Eric thought about which bartender would be harassing Sookie. She was blonde, so definitely Chow's tastes. That bastard Charles Twining would easily fall for such a woman, sweet and innocent was just his type.

"Eric, don't get me wrong! She's very beautiful, I'm quite flattered, really! It's just, all the free drinks, makes me feel guilty, like I owe her? Maybe sexually? She's very pretty, hell, I might just take her up on her offer since _apparently_ I'm just damaged goods anyway. I've never really had the opportunity to experiment during college. Maybe those drinks were to loosen my inhibitions so she could take advantage? Oh no, you're not going to fire her for giving out free booze, now are you? Because if that's the case, then I definitely paid for them!"

Eric interrupted her nervous ramblings with a low rumbling chuckle. She smiled and looked away nervously again.

"That's just Pam. She's actually my cousin." Sookie smile widened and her shoulders seemed to relax a bit. "And you don't owe her anything." Eric thought back on what she had said. "Damaged goods?"

"Oh. Yeah. Something stupid Bill had said in a voicemail." Sookie drew her knees up under her chin. Eric reconsidered his position. This was easily the longest conversation he had ever had with a woman he didn't plan on seducing, other than Pam of course. Normally, ex-boyfriend monologues were his cue to head to bed, but this was the second time he had witnessed this beautiful woman put herself down.

"You listen to his voicemails? Fuck that guy. Fuck his voicemail!"

"Yeah! Fuck his couch," Sookie whispered. She was trying to joke her sadness away but failing miserably. Eric placed a hand on her elevated knees to get her attention. Sookie straightened out, reluctantly, so Eric turned her chin with his fingertips so she'd face him.

"From what I can see, Bill's a fool to ever let you go, and "I" don't even know you. Damaged goods? That's bullshit, I mean, I know some guys who'd pay top dollar for a lap full of your popcorn." Sookie's smiled, even though her eyes were still brimming with tears. Eric decided to address how she described herself whenever she first moved in. "And Sookie? Average is the last word i'd use to describe you, and you'd better _believe_ you'd intimidate any hot dates that come over if all you're gonna wear is a t shirt and those _sexy_ Wonder Woman panties." Sookie's practically jumped back from Eric's grasp, laughing as she covered her face in embarassment. "And that include's CLAUDE's dates, too!" Sookie punched his arm playfully before standing up, taking her bowl with her.

"Thank you, Eric. I think I can probably sleep now, do you want me to turn this off?" She motioned to the tv behind her, Eric shook his head. He'd watch a bit more until it got to his favorite scene. She walked behind his couch towards the kitchen, kissing the top of his head. "Night, Eric." He smiled.

"Goodnight, Sookie."


	6. Chapter 6

Well I certainly hope you all are prepared for a super-mega-ultra long chapter! For the record, I own nothing-

Chapter 6

"BITCH. I love you!" Sookie was taken aback, was Claudine drunk? It was always tricky to tell if she was drunk over the phone.

"Excuse me?" Sookie maneuvered out of the way so that the giant burly men (and one very small man) moving in her mattress and box spring could get passed her. They were all very disgruntled, probably from climbing a good five flights of stairs. Cornering mattresses in small stairways must really suck. She made a mental note to tip all four of the guys before they left.

"You heard me! And HONESTLY, I shouldn't love you half as much as I do, seeing as MY BEST FRIEND didn't even wanna hang out with me on my BIRTHDAY! No, instead she traded me in for my twin, WHOM SHE BARELY KNOWS!"

"Claudine, I'm sorry. It's just...I really like it here and I JUST met these guys, and I think they're _finally_ starting to like me, too. Besides, you know I haven't really felt like _going out_ since that whole, break-up, Bill, thing..."

"Exactly. And that is EXACTLY why we're going out tonight! It's a scientific FACT that the absolute best way to get over a man is to simply get under a new one!" Sookie rolled her eyes. Deep down she knew that there wasn't really any getting out of it, it was her best friend's birthday request.

"Fine. I'll meet you tonight." Sookie sighed into the receiver and Claudine practically squealed with Joy. "Can you call me later? I really need to take care of some things, and pay these nice young men for moving all of my big heavy furniture!" Sookie winked at the shortest (and scrawniest) of the men as she said her farewells to Claudine. He smiled bashfully and looked down at his feet. Sookie giggled, suddenly impowered from using the Northman Technique.

"Well, I didn't know you had it in you Stackhouse. Tell me, what happened to that sweet southern girl with her clever t-shirts?" Sookie leaned up against the kitchen counter and smiled sweetly at the viking who was obviously spying on her. He was as attractive as ever, wearing a simple white t-shirt and light brown plaid board shorts. It surprised her that she never heard him sneaking up on her even though he was wearing flip-flops.

"I just wanted to try out some of that Northman Charm! I think I've actually improved on the original. I could give you some pointers if you'd like." Eric smirked at her cockiness. He came to stand next to her at the counter, their shoulders touching.

"You still have _much_ to learn, Sookie. If you really put the Northman moves on that boy he'd be begging you for your phone number." Sookie chuckled to herself but was pleasantly surprised when said moving man barrelled back through their front door. He stopped and hesitated a bit when he saw Eric.

"I'm sorry, I jus- I just wanted to say it was nice meeting you, Sookie." He blushed as his eyes found hers.

"Oh, it was nice meeting you too, ...um?"

"Barry! It's Barry." He was flustered, and it only made Sookie smile more.

"It was nice meeting you Barry. Thanks for helping me move in the bed and hauling it up all those flights of stairs!" He shyly scratched the back of his head.

"I um, I don't know if you're, new..to town, but since you're moving in here and all..." He trailed off before taking a deep breath to continue. "Just if you want me to show you the sights, or even just hang out, I just wanted to leave you my number-JUST IN CASE!" Sookie smiled warmly and took the slip of paper he was offering.

"Thanks Barry, I actuall-"

"Yes, Thank you Barry, we'll be in touch." Eric successfuly cut him off, leading Sookie back down the hall towards her bedroom. Sookie struggled to turn back to see Barry off, not wanting to be rude, but the hand Eric had planted firmly on her lower back pushed her quickly out of his line of sight. He practically shoved Sookie into her bedroom and slammed the door behind them.

"Ha! I TOLD you I'm the new master of the Northman technique! Look who's got _GAME_! I guess all I have left to learn is the Northman Art of COCKBLOCK!" Eric nearly scowled.

"Believe me, I was doing you a _favor_. That kid barely weighed 90 pounds! What kind of moving company would hire that guy?" Sookie was just about to defend young Barry's honor, but quickly realized she was alone with Eric, in her _bedroom_. The night before was different since it was in a communal setting: the living room. Now? They were alone in her _bedrooom_! Much more intimate. Before Sookie could ask Eric what he was thinking, her bedroom door was flung open as Claude let himself in.

"Who's slamming doors?" Sookie childishly pointed at Eric. He simply rolled his eyes at Claude's questioning scowl.

"What? We were just gonna test out the mattress." Eric raised his eyebrows suggestively while Sookie giggled nervously. "Seriously though, Claude, we need to hit up Ikea." Claude and Sookie exchanged curious glances before jumping at the chance to make fun of Eric.

"Why, are you feeling homesick for something Swedish?" Eric ignored him and used his hand to gesture about the room.

"Well, while we _all _miss the fort, there isn't even a closet in this room, so we're gonna have to make one. Or what? Do you want Sookie to just live out of these boxes?" Claude looked surprised but nodded in agreement.

Sookie was touched. She finally had some confirmation that these guys actually were starting to warm up to her. The fact that they wanted her to unpack was a good sign that they wanted her stay, right?

"Oh, no. Don't worry about me! I can probably just buy a set of drawers or something since I didn't really get most of my clothes from my old place."

"You still have stuff at Bill's?" Eric actually seemed upset, but Sookie decided to ignore it.

"I mean, it's all packed and everything. He just surprised me and came home early and I had to evacuate out of my bedroom window. Left most of my stuff behind."

"Sookie, you need to get your things."

"Oh, yeah. I know, I mean, I will!" Luckily, a knock on the door distracted everyone from her hesitation. Alcide peeked his head into the bedroom.

"Everything alright?" This time Claude stole the joke but decided to take it a step further.

"Great timing, we were just about to test out Sookie's new mattress." Claude started to undo his belt and Eric took off his t-shirt. Alcide choked on his spit.

"GUYS!" Sookie was looking anywhere but at Eric's perfectly sculpted body, trying to convince herself that initiating her new bed with these three gods wasn't a panty-dropping dream come true. "What about Ikea?"

"Right! Ikea, hey Alcide, you have any plans for today? Think we can borrow your truck?"

"No plans, why?"

"Sookie needs some shelves, or dresser, or something since there isn't even a closet in here."

"And then we gotta swing by her old place and pick up the rest of her stuff." Sookie flinched.

"What? No, guys, I'll just go another time-"

"Good idea, I'll drive." Argh. Sookie's shoulders slumped in defeat. Eric put his shirt back on (unfortunately), and she followed her three slavedrivers out the front door, only stopping to grab her purse.

Down in the parking lot Alcide sprinted towards his red pickup truck as Sookie sluggishly followed behind Claude and Eric. They led her to a red Dodge Challenger, Eric slipping into the driver's seat while Claude stood in the open doorway on the passenger's side. He slid the seat forward and folded it over, smirking at Sookie as he called "shotgun".

Now Sookie grew up with the Infamous Jason Stackhouse and knew every loop hole when it came down to riding shotgun, like declaring a GTA (grand theft auto), in which she'd have 15 seconds to rip Claude out of the front seat and close the door on him, but Claude was twice her size and the act seemed impossible in the two-door sports car. Sookie huffed and squeezed her extra-curves into the small gap between seats.

They were ready to drive off, but Alcide stopped his truck behind the Challenger and called out of his window.

"Ya'll are gonna make me ride alone?" Claude mumbled something about taking one for the team and shared a sentimental fist bump with Eric before exiting the vehicle and climbing into Alcide's truck.

The pick-up sped out of the lot as Sookie observed Eric the Northman's driving skills. He methodically placed his right hand behind the headrest of the empty passenger seat and glanced over his shoulder to make sure he wouldn't back up into oncoming traffic before he too sped out of the lot. It came as no surprise to her that he would be a speed demon; he drove a muscle car, not a Prius. Seeing Eric behind the wheel was incredibly sexy.

"This is ridiculous." Sookie waited for his eyes to meet hers in his rear view mirror. "It looks like you're driving Miss Daisy!" Before he could question her, Sookie began her voyage into the front seat, climbing over his center console.

"Sookie, WHAT THE-" Eric wasn't exactly sure how to stop Sookie's little stunt, and made a huge mistake by shifting in his seat to assess the situation. Her right hand was reaching for the floorboards and her plentiful breasts were practically thrust into his face.

"Wow, not too much room to maneuver, huh?" before he was physically able to THINK, she switched angles so she could climb into the front seat. Suddenly, he was accosted with the unreal sight of her captivating ass in extremely tight jeans. In an amazing feat of flexibility, she had casually slinked into the Shotgun position, blowing her bangs out of her face before flashing Eric her triumphant smile.

"Incredibly dangerous Stackhouse." He wanted to glare at her, but he couldn't shake the twitching of his lips.

"I'm so sorry Eric, I had no idea I was riding with my _grandmother_..." Oh, she had jokes.

"At these speeds, and a stunt like that? Impaling me with your boob-shaped..boobs!" He tore his eyes away from the road to grin at the dare-devil beside him. "All HORRIBLY irresponsible!"

Sookie looked away, here she thought she was just having fun with her new roommate. Instead, he scolded her like a child. She slouched, regretting ever having the _idea _they could be friends. Then from out of nowhere, his hand went to her thigh as he leaned closer to her.

"I could barely keep my hands on the wheel..." he whispered huskily. Her head snapped back to him and the lusty smile he was sporting practically melted her panties off.

The first hour spent at Ikea was a complete waste of time. The guys would point out different wardrobes, dressers, and cabinets, and Sookie would check the price-tag before making up different flaws for each piece of furniture.

Finally Claude put his foot down. He had been pushing a large (semi-opaque) wardrobe with sliding doors, plenty of storage, and super convenient pull-out clothing rails. Of course it cost a fortune and he and Sookie caused a scene arguing over who was going to buy it. Eric rubbed his temples and Alcide distanced himself from the group as they fought.

Sookie was extremely independent (to a fault) and incredibly stubborn when it came to taking care of herself. The only reason she _finally _gave in was because Claude reminded her a closet was a necessity in a bedroom and it was (their) duty to provide her with one. The other deciding factor was when Eric whispered into her ear that people were starting to stare.

Claude snatched the paper and official Ikea pencil from her, wrote down the info for the wardrobe, and he and Alcide took off to purchase the dresser before Sookie would even have a chance to change her mind. Eric linked his arm with hers and nodded his head to point out their next destination. He was surprisingly good at distracting her from her thoughts, something that most of her friends were barely able to pull off. She sighed heavily before following his lead.

"Did we even need to buy anything else?" She asked him, still looking at all the impeccably designed rooms around them.

"Yeah, gotta see the kitchen-ware downstairs. I need a new wok."

"What? Really?" He quirked his eyebrow at her. "Oh, I'm sorry. You just kinda shocked me. Didn't know you could cook." Eric just smiled to himself as they walked. "When a person's beautiful, it's surprising to find they can do anything else, really."

"Oh yeah, I can cook, and I know how to _read_ too.." he teased. Sookie faked a gasp and gripped her chest in mock astonishment.

"A reader too? A TRIPLE THREAT!" Eric grinned.

"Yea, well you're a bit surprising yourself, Stackhouse."

"Please, call me Sookie. _Stackhouse_ is my _brother_..."

"Excuse me. Sookie, I had no idea _you_ were a crazy Bag-Lady."

"EXCUSE ME?" Eric pointed to the large brown leather purse Sookie was carrying. Sookie grumbled and took her arm back from the Swede beside her. "This ol' thing?"

"If you weren't my roommate I'd assume you sported that purse to haul your 10 pound bags of catfood around." She wanted to feel insulted, really, but his flirtacious smirk only made her feel more playful.

"Eric, I'm a teacher. I have enough supplies in here to recreate the setting of the Last Supper, well, if the disciples were pirates...who ate a lot of popsicles."

"Do you have any food in there? Really. I'm getting hungry." Sookie rolled her eyes, but fished out a fruit roll-up from her purse and handed it over to him.

"Woah, you're like a mom! What else do you have in that magical purse? Personal Pan Pizza? An Umbrella to fly to the next family in need of a good Nanny?" Sookie chuckled to herself. Of all the things she had heard about Eric, humorous wasn't exactly on the list.

"You're welcome." She looked at him pointedly.

Soon they were out in the parking lot in search of the rest of their roommates. Eric tossed his new wok into the back seat of the Challenger as his phone began to ring "It's Raining Men".

"What's up Claude?" Sookie snickered at his selected ring tone. "Yeah, me too. Sookie had to feed me a fruit-roll up for sustenance. Yea, huge purse, right?" She rolled her eyes, waiting for them to finish their girl-talk. Eric nodded his head at the car and sat down into the driver's seat, motioning for Sookie to get in, too. "You sure man? We can go somewhere else. Okay. We'll meet you there."

Eric snapped his phone shut and winked at Sookie. He started the car and took off at a threatening speed. Sookie buckled up.

"They went home to drop off your furniture. Alcide said he'll set it up tonight after dinner. Hope you like Chinese."

"Love it." She replied snarkily. After a few moments Sookie realized he actually had no clue she was upset. "You guys just _love _making decisions for other people, don't you?" Eric laughed.

"Just for you Sookie." He whispered while leaning towards her. "Because it's too easy to get you flustered." She blushed. "Besides, it's not like you have some sort of record for making _great life decisions_thus far."

...annnd, Just like that, their cute flirty moment was over.

Eric pulled up at a restaurant named "Big Wongs". Sookie released the breath she had subconciously been holding. For a while she worried she wasn't dressed up enough to go out to eat with "the boys". She had ditched her usual witty t-shirt that day for a green sweater with a white collar, the only thing nerdy about it was the small blue dinosaur stitched over her heart. Her jeans were a bit tighter than usual. The ensemble screamed "casual" and luckily a place like "Big Wong's" probably didn't have a strict dress code. Sometimes it just wasn't fair. People who looked as good as Eric, Claude, and Alcide could waltz into any fancy establishment wearing fanny-packs and still be considered socially acceptable, but if, God forbid, _Sookie _didn't have on a strappy pair of heels, she'd be gawked at her whole meal!

Since the rest of their Party wouldn't be arriving until later, Eric and Sookie stepped into the poorly lit restaurant. It smelled amazing. Her bewildered expression didn't go unnoticed so Eric leaned far into Sookie's personal space, speaking softly to her.

"Smells good, right? This is sort of 'our place'. Well it used to be our place. Best Chinese food in the city!"

"What do you mean it _used_ to be your place?" Eric winked at her, again.

"You'll see soon enough." Just then, not one but Two hostesses showed up. One lady had the most obnoxiously red hair, the other chewed gum loudly and clicked her tasteless fake nails together in excitement.

"ERIC! IT'S BEEN SO LONG-annnnd" their faces fell when they spotted Sookie. "You brought a _friend_." Sookie squirmed under their critiquing eyes.

"Don't worry ladies, the boys will join us shortly." He winked and the women practically swooned. They were led to a simple table towards the back even though there were plenty of available booths. Eric thanked them after taking the seat across from Sookie, and the ladies took off towards the kitchen.

They must have been far too distracted by Eric's beauty to properly do their job, because Eric took the rolled silverware and set them at the appropriate seats and placed the paper placemats (with the chinese zodiac printed on them) accordingly as well. Soon enough Alcide and Claude snuck into the building, scanning the rooms and stealthily bolting for their table. Something fishy was going on.

Before they could even sit down, even MORE server women rushed out from the kitchen, shouting their names which made everyone eating at the restaurant stop to stare. The brunette with the nails (and tacky dark colored bra under her sheer white uniform t-shirt) grasped Claude's arm and snaked her other arm around his waist.

"We thought you guys had forgotten about us! Claude, you must have spent _hours_ at the gym, I don't remember these muscles feeling _this _good before." Sookie's eyes widened and Claude visibly cringed. Sookie was shocked, did these women not know he was gay?

"Of course Dawn, it's so easy to stay in shape when you have such great motivation." Sookie was still confused, but the tables turned instantly when her role as Observer switched to active participant. Claude escaped (hostess) Dawn's embrace and leaned down to Sookie's level, capturing her lips in a soft kiss. Her head practically exploded.

It all happened so fast, she wasn't exactly sure how to react! Dawn stormed back to the kitchen, her entourage trailing behind her, and Claude sat down and opened a menu in a completely nonchalant manner. Eric seemed oblivious to what happened and Alcide was grinning from ear to ear.

"What. The fuck?" Claude just shrugged like it was no big deal. As usual, the only person who even tried to explain things, Eric, leaned across the table locking eyes with her.

"Well the _food_ is excellent, just Claude is a bit of a celebrity here. Women go ape-shit whenever we sit down. He's tried everything, told 'em numerous times how very very gay he was, but no one seemed to care."

"Yeah," Alcide chimed in, "first time he brought me here, I got thrown in the same position as you did." Alcide cringed at the memory while Sookie's eyes glazed over, thinking about very sexual positions to be thrown into.

"That plan backfired. I think these women loved us even more. Good thing Sookie's a better actress than you were, Alcide. We might actually get to eat here more often now."

"What? WHO was acting, Claude?" He smirked, clasping her chin gently with his long fingers.

"It wasn't an act? You meant evert second of it, Sookie?" His eyes danced with laughter as he wrapped his other arm behind her back over her chair. She slapped his hand away from her face and blushed.

"Maybe next time you should warn me before you guys make me out to be a pretend love interest." Sookie picked up her menu and hid behind it from the rest of the roommates. Eric brazenly laughed, probably drawing all sorts of unnecessary attention back to their table.

"Um, Sookie? We've actually been meaning to ask.." Sookie peered over the top of her menu to see Alcide fidgeting across the table.

"Yes?"

"Next weekend, a friend of ours is getting married, and this was all completely Claude's idea, by the way! Anyway, we need you to play my pretend love interest."

"What?" Sookie slapped her menu back down, staring at the boys incredulously. Oddly enough, Eric seemed just as shocked as she was.

"My ex, Debbie is going to be there. She just got engaged to some Ass-Clown and I want her to see that I'm doing _fine_ without her. I hate to do this to you, but I'd _really _appreciate it if you'd think about it."

Alcide looked like a sad puppy. Sookie burried her head in her hands as she mulled it over. Technically, she owed it to him. He was the first person to vote her into living at their apartment, he pitched in, hauled, and volunteered to build her wardrobe for her, and the way his eyes were pleading with hers, she found it _very_ hard to tell him no.

"Okay." Her response shocked everyone. "Why not..? I actually Love weddings. Chicken Dance, blowing bubbles, throwing rice-"

"NO. CHICKEN-DANCE!" Claude shouted. Sookie shrugged and looked back to the menu.

"Stupid idea.." Eric muttered. Alcide took it upon himself to change the subject.

"Chinese Zodiac. I was born in the year of theeee...TIGER. That's pretty sweet. I mean, the tiger is more badass than all of these animals! I could eat _any _of these animals. I could eat the rabbit, I could eat the horse, I could eat the boar, I could eat the-" Sookie had a glint of mischief in her eyes.

"How 'bout the _cock_ Alcide, do you eat the _cock_?" The table fell silent.

The guys looked at each other, stunned. Soon they were all cracking up, Claude slapping Sookie on the back, Eric with tears filling his eyes, Alcide was as red as his truck.

"Where the fuck did this girl come from?" Claude asked the others, Eric and Alcide shook their heads, laughing too hard to respond.

Suddenly, their riotous laughter was interrupted by an extremely beautiful Asian woman clearing her throat. She was dressed too nicely to really be a server, but she had her pen out ready to take orders.

"Oh, I was starting to wonder why I hadn't seen any Asian-Americans at this Chinese food restaurant!" Sookie smiled brightly at the waitress before stunning the men into silence Once Again. She was speaking animatedly towards the woman IN MANDARIN. The woman started to crack up hysterically, holding her stomach before addressing the boys.

"Oh I LIKE her!" The Chinese woman pointed to Sookie.

"What did you say to her?" Alcide whispered to Sook.

"Oh, I just asked her to make sure none of Claude's _fanclub _spit in my food."

"Where did you learn to speak Chinese?" Sookie shrugged like it wasn't a big deal, but Eric, Claude, and Alcide were overwhelmed.

"Which one of you guys found her? The girls in the kitchen say she's Claude's new girlfriend, but I know she doesn't have the right equipment for that." Claude grinned. "And Eric doesn't introduce his _conquests_ to his friends, so it's not like you're on a date." Sookie's eyes met Eric's, he didn't confirm or deny that she was correct. "Alcide! Are you really getting back out there? It's about damn time!"

"Nah, Nancy this is Sookie. Sookie's our new roommate." The woman made an approving nod before reaching to shake Sookie's hand.

"Hi, I'm Nancy Wong. It's nice to meet you, Sookie." Even Sookie was a little turned on by her sexy Broken English.

"No, the pleasure's all mine! So you're...Big..Wong?" The tiny Chinese lady laughed again.

"Yes, something like that. What can I get for you?" Sookie looked to the guys, expecting them to jump in and order since this was "their place" after all. They were silent, since Nancy was still beaming at Sookie.

Not wanting to keep the lady waiting, Sookie started speaking Chinese once more and Nancy smiled, tapping her pen to her chin.

"Okay." she said, pleased. "And you guys? The Usual?" Claude nodded since he was the only one physically able to shake off his stupefaction. Nancy snapped her ticket book shut, winked at Sookie playfullly before skipping back to the kitchen. Eric raised his eyebrow in question.

"I asked her to surprise me since she knows what's good here. So how did you guys meet Nancy? She's Gorgeous!" Sookie took a sip of water from the glass in front of her, suddenly realizing their crappy hostesses didn't even offer them drinks.

"We posed together for a book cover once." Sookie turned to face Claude while he spoke. "She asked me out, actually. I told her she wasn't really my type and she said that was fine since she had a "Big Wong"." Sookie laughed.

And Laughed. And Laughed! The entire meal was amazing. Nancy actually came out and joined them, sharing an enormous plate of curry and rice with Sookie. She smiled, loving how comfortable everyone was with one another and enjoyed the feel of a loud, fun family dinner. She couldn't remember the last time she had experienced something like it. Suddenly, her phone went off.

"Oh shit." Sookie visibly paled.

"What is it?" Alcide asked, the table grew quiet while the phone rang.

"Claudine?" Sookie answered tentatively. "Oh, yeah, of course. I kinda lost track of time is all! No, of course I didn't forget!" Sookie smacked her palm to her head dramatically, emphasizing she _did_ in fact forget. "Yeah yeah, just give me, an..hour?" Sookie squeaked. She bit her lip then said a quick farewell, hung up, and picked up her purse. The guys swore they heard her mutter the words "shit balls" under her breath.

"Everything okay?" Claude asked.

"Yeah, I promised Claudine I'd go out with her tonight since I sort of missed _her_ birthday party last night." Sookie looked down at the floor guiltily. "I'm so sorry, I'm having such an amazing time, really! -But I need one of you to give me a ride home, like right now." Her eyes travelled back and forth between Eric and Alcide, since they had vehicles and all. "I love Claudine to death, but she doesn't fuck around when it comes to drinking on her birthday! If I don't wanna feel her wrath, I should have started getting ready _hours_ ago."

"Yeah, let's go." Eric volunteered. Alcide kind of seemed pissed he had beat him to it. "My car's faster." he shrugged. Sookie sighed in relief before leaning over to hug Nancy. She was startled for a moment, obviously not expecting to be hugged by someone she had barely met, but quickly relaxed into it.

"Thank you so much for dinner! It was so lovely meeting you! Everything was amazing, I don't mean to dine and dash, but best friend's birthday, _kind _of a big deal!" She smiled warmly and reached into her purse, retrieving her original Nintendo controller wallet. She pulled out some cash, threw some smaller bills on the table and handed a twenty to Alcide, giving him a VERY pointed look so he wouldn't fight her on pitching in for the meal. He nodded in confirmation.

"Actually, Nancy, where are my manners? I know you have a business to run, but if you can, you should definitely join us tonight! Well, all of you really you should come! I'm not sure where we're going out tonight, but I know it'll be a lot of fun!"

Eric and Sookie started making their way towards the door, but Nancy shouted she wouldn't miss it for the world and would just call Claude when everything was settled at the restaurant. They all waved goodbyes while Eric and Sook maneuvered through a sea of skank-waitresses and their desperate farewells to Eric.

The minute the car sped off, Sookie rummaged through her crazy bag-lady sized purse and pulled out a handful of cosmetics. There was no time to talk, so Eric just alternated viewing the road and watching a panicked Sookie trying to beautify herself. She tossed her thickly framed glasses haphazardly into Eric's lap as she dabbed on concealer around her face, rubbing it in as she went. She used her fingers to rub a pretty gold color over her eyelids. When she reached for the eyeliner, Eric actually feared for her and paid extra attention to the road.

"Don't slow down! If I poke out an eye, I've got a fake pirate eyepatch in my purse!" Eric laughed and pressed down on the accelerator.

After a few moments, Sookie tossed the tubes and containers back into her purse. He glanced at her from the corner of his eye, eager to see Sookie's finished product, but his jaw hit the floor as Sookie innocently let her hair down from the messy knot she had it tied into atop her head. It was the sexiest thing he had ever seen. It was probably only provocative because Sookie didn't even realize what she was doing, even though to Eric, she was doing it all in slow-motion.

She let her hair down, shook it out from side to side, expertly running her fingers through it, shaking segments of it out, and attempting to fluff it up around the crown of her head. The way it was tied before made her hair fall down in curls of different sizes and directions, but it looked great. In fact, it looked better than great! Eric had seen Pam sit for hours in a mirror trying to achieve this same look, and all Sookie had to do was take out a couple of hair ties. It was unreal how beautiful this woman was, without any knowledge of it, herself!

She smiled radiantly to Eric, as if asking for Confirmation that she looked decent. Unfortunately, he had no response. At all. In fact, he wasn't even capable of blinking. Sookie recovered from feeling dejected from his lack of enthusiasm, to suddenly worried he had fallen ill. A car honking suddenly made them both look to the road.

Eric's Challenger had veered into oncoming traffic while he fantasized about Sookie letting her hair down and taking off her ridiculous sweater. He corrected the car before any collisions, but Sookie let out a yelp in fear anyway. He ran his hands through his hair to calm himself, _and_ his raging hard on-and _unfortunately_, things just seemed to go from bad to worse.

Sookie's hand, that was first held over her crazy-irregular beating heart, suddenly reached over to Eric's leg as she blindly began to feel around for her glasses.

_How can she not see them? They're two inches thick for Christ's sake! Is she REALLY that blind?_

And naturally, her fingers grazed over his hardened length. He sucked in air through his clenched teeth, and the hiss made Sookie jump back like she had just burned her hand. She knew what she had felt, and Eric couldn't bring himself to make eye contact with her. He simply grabbed the frames and held them out for her to take.

She thanked him quietly, and would look only out of her side-window.

Had she been _any_ other woman, Eric could have played it through. He could have said just the right thing. He could have pulled over to some obscure parking lot and ravished her, but no. It had to be Sookie Fucking Stackhouse riding shotgun, innocently seducing him.

He was so discombobulated from almost wrecking the Challenger, becoming completely aroused over _hair_, and then seeing her _hide_ from him after _accidentally_ stroking his cock, he almost wanted to yell at her! Instead he ground his teeth together as his white knuckles strangled his steering wheel.

Once they entered the parking lot, Eric hadn't even come to a complete stop before Sookie jumped out of the vehicle, dashing towards the entrance. Eric parked and flexed his hands, popping his knuckles to relieve the tension from the drive. It was a bizarre torture, riding with a girl like Sookie. The crazy part was that they couldn't have been on the road more than five minutes. Big Wong's was practically around the corner.

Once upstairs, Eric walked into the apartment. The front door was left wide open in Sookie's haste to get ready, and there was actually an adorable trail of clothing all the way to her room. He grabbed her sneakers off the ground before making his way into the kitchen to grab a much needed bottle of water.

He sipped casually, picking the rest of Sookie's clothes up off the floor, and then leaned against the hallway wall, listening to the sounds of her cursing behind her bedroom door. Soon Alcide and Claude joined him in the hallway, listening to Sookie's string of profanities and the sound of boxes sliding across the floor or landing in loud thuds as she tossed them about. After a particularly loud grunt of frustration, Claude cleared his throat.

"How's it going in there, Baked po-tato?" The door was flung open and Sookie's crazy smile fell when she realized Claude was not alone outside her bedroom door. She blushed in embarassment while all three of the guys checked her out. Gone were her thick frames, so she must have put in some contact lenses. The only thing she seemed to be wearing was a small silky white robe, that barely covered down past her ass, and an eccentric pair of panty hose with lacey black flower patterns travelling up her legs.

"I'm sorry, I think my _fancy_ clothes are still at Bill's."

"Sookie, I told you you needed to get your things." She reached for her clothes and shoes Eric was holding while muttering a dejected "yeah...".

"Sookie, why don't you just check Eric's lost and found box?" Claude made a proud face like he was MacGyver. Sookie looked confused and Eric wouldn't meet her eyes. Instead he nodded his head towards his bedroom at the end of the hall.

"Yeah. Come on, I have sizes 0 through 8." Sookie followed after him muttering how she might be a size 8 on a good day.

Alcide and Claude went into Sookie's room, probably to start building her new Ikea wardrobe as Sookie walked into Eric's dark bedroom. Once she was inside, his door slammed closed behind her, leaving her terrified in complete darkness. Was he going to kiss her?

Suddenly the lights flipped on and Sookie was blown away by her surroundings. His bedroom was enormous. In front of her was a small bar and sink, to the left of that another doorway. To her immediate left was a sectioned off corner that was it's own private living room, a fairly good sized flat screened tv, an x-box 360, several games scattered across the floor in front of a small black leather love seat. In the corner of that section was a fancy chair obviously designed for gaming. Huh. So Eric was a bit of a nerd, too.

The room was very nicely decorated. Lots of asian inspired artwork along the walls, plenty of mirrors too, probably to enhance the lighting since there was only one large factory styled window in the room. His window was much bigger than the one in Sookie's bedroom.

To the right was Eric's enormous bed. Of course he would have a large bed, since Eric was such a tall guy. Sookie followed behind him as he led her past the huge bed and it's silky dark sheets to stand in front of what must be his closet.

He looked like some kind of super spy. To the naked eye, it looked just like a normal book case, some books, trinkets, photos, and on both ends of the book case were large full-body mirrors. Eric stood in front of the mirror on the left and pushed the bookcase over, revealing an enormous walk in closet. The further the bookcase slid, the brighter the lights in the closet became.

"Wow." -was all she could say.

The closet was immaculately organized. Eric owned a _lot_ of suits, expensive looking ones at that. Sookie knew it wasn't very lady-like to snoop, but she couldn't help but notice the empty set of suit cases hiding a guitar-case in the back. One corner of the closet was stacked neatly with different sneakers and dress shoes. There were beautiful cabinets along the left portion of the closet, another large mirror on the right, surrounded by light bulbs, like a mirror a celebrity would have. Eric made his way to the back of the closet, pushed some dress pants and shoe boxes out of the way and pulled out a good sized cardboard box. He pushed past Sookie and sat on his bed, dropping the box on the silky sheets beside him.

She joined him on the bed, the box sitting between them, as she started to rummage through the misplaced belongings. There was an awful lot of jewelry, an uneven number of shoes and earrings, and plenty of expensive looking sweaters. Sookie pulled out a very sexy black high heeled shoe, it had a silver zipper above the heel with a cute keychain on the top. The under side of the shoe was whore-ishly bright red. Sookie loved them, probably because she herself would never buy such a sexy pair of shoes. Eric quirked an eyebrow as she examined the shoes.

"Wow Eric, you've made love to a lot of forgetful women." He smirked at the thought of "making love" to any of those girls. He watched carefully as she pulled out a couple tops and laid them out on his bed. She created a seperate pile further away from her, probably the clothes that were too small for her. Eric knew not to say a _word_ if he didn't want Sookie to freak out all over again. The last item Sookie brought out was a black dress that made her gasp when she saw it.

She immediately checked the tag, probably to see what size it was. She stared at it, almost unsure if she should try it on. Before Sookie even had time to reconsider trying it on a loud banging on Eric's door distracted them.

"SOOKIE STACKHOUSE! I KNOW YOU'RE IN THERE! IF YOU DON'T COME OUT OF THERE DRESSED AND READY TO GO, YOU'RE IN FOR A WORLD OF HURT, MY FRIEND!"

Sookie jumped to her feet, whisper shouting "She's Drunk!" before she pushed Eric closer to the door. He could hear the rustling of fabric behind him and knew better than to turn around and look. Luckily, there was a small mirror in front of him that caught part of Sookie's reflection. He shifted slightly to the right to catch a better glimpse of her while she changed and became almost lightheaded from the instant loss of the blood flowing through his body that now flowed straight to his throbbing dick.

Sookie had taken off her robe, and what Eric had once assumed was an eccentric pair of panty-hose actually turned out to be very high stockings, stopping just below the curves of her ass. The sexiest part of the ensemble was the garter around her waist, holding her stockings up. Everything matched, all lacy and black. Her bra was doing a terrible job of covering up her enormous breasts since they were spilling out, just begging to be touched. Her skimpy bra did cover her nipples, leaving Eric to imagine what color they were.

This woman was seriously underestimated. Sure, she looked perfectly fuckable in her funny t-shirts and painted on jeans, but in her underwear alone, this girl could rule the world! Her body's curves could bring any man down to his knees. It was as close to perfection as Eric had ever seen. Bountiful breasts, ass for weeks, flat stomach, smooth, tanned, long legs, but she also had muscle! It wasn't like staring at those stick-thin girls wearing padded bras. No. Sookie's legs and arms showed she was anything _but _weak, but nothing grotesque. Everything about her was very feminine and alluring.

His penis _ached_ to be inside her, but the pounding on his door broke the spell Sookie had cast over him. She was right when she had said Claudine didn't fuck around when it came to girl's night out. When he looked back into the mirror to get another glimpse of Sookie practically naked, he was slightly disappointed to see her squeezed into the black dress with a red sash around her waist. The dress had a very low neckline that left little to the imagination with her creamy breasts on display. The dress might have been too small for her figure, but it only accentuated the curves it could barely contain. She was fucking exquisite.

Sookie called his name as she hopped towards him, slipping on the first-class black and red Hooker Heels. He spun around, still bewildered. Sookie revealed her outfit to Eric while popping out a hip and presenting the dress using "Vanna White" hands. His sexy grin was apparently the perfect response to her silent question so she brushed past him to fling open his door for a very anxious Claudine Crane.

"Oh, my God." Claudine's face went from furious to perplexed as she shamelessly checked Sookie out.


	7. Chapter 7

Dearest readers, it has been FAR too long since I've had a chance to write/update the story! I just really wanted to thank all of you for your reviews, especially the few people who took the time to remind me you're still interested in where this story goes! It's really the best motivation to keep writing whenever my 4 month old takes a nap, haha. You are all the best.

Hopefully will actually notify people a new chapter's up this go-around!

Chapter 7

"Sookie! You look HOT! Doesn't she look hot?" Claudine was addressing Eric, but Claude and Alcide came out of Sookie's bedroom to see for themselves. There were a few approving grunts and Claude actually clapped softly at Sookie's appearance.

"Please, hold your applause.." Sookie pretended to blow kisses to Claude and the rest of her fake adoring fans. Claudine smiled then Sookie hooked arms with the birthday girl before they strut into the living room. As they trekked down the hallway Sookie chatted excitedly as Claudine looked back over her shoulder at Eric. She made "obvious eyes" at three different points of interest: his eyes, his prominent erection, and a quick glance to Sookie. After her eyes did the rotation a good two or three times, she wiggled her eyebrows at him before joining in on Sookie's game-plan for the evening.

As soon as they were safely in the living room and the guys were back in Sookie's bedroom building the wardrobe, Eric adjusted his junk.

"Sookie, that all sounds _fantastic_, but how about we just go back to that club, Valkyrie? I promise, I'll keep you safe from the Big Bad Lesbian!" Sookie smiled.

"That's actually a great idea! Did you know that that's ERIC's club?" she asked excitedly. Claudine faked surprise.

"Are you serious? No. Way." Sookie's eyes narrowed a bit, Claudine definitely had something up her sleeve.

"Yeahhh, well. I should probably warn you, I invited some people. Just the guys and a new friend, Nancy. I hope you don't min-"

"Of course not, Sookie! The more the merrier!" Claudine dragged Sookie out the door.

"I'm pretty sure it's clean." Eric snapped out of his thoughts and he looked back to Pam. She had her hip cocked out as she smirked evilly. She pointed to the rag Eric was using to rub down the bar, and sure enough, he had been rubbing the same spot for the past five minutes.

It wasn't exactly his fault. Sookie was out on the dancefloor swaying her sensual hips to the music in the most hypnotic way. It was impossible for him to watch her dance without imaginig her moving without clothes on, especially since he knew exactly she had on underneath that dress. Claude and Claudine were out there dancing with her, so of course everyone at the club had their eyes glued to them. (Men and Women both...)

"You _do_ know that I called dibs on her about two months ago." Pam brought out her phone to text Chow and ask for some help behind the bar. That night Eric was about as useful as a hat full of busted-assholes.

Eric crossed his arms in front of his chest as he continued to watch Sookie dance. How was it possible that he never noticed this woman before? She was hands down the coolest girl he had ever met, and somehow he had overlooked her where as Pam spotted her potential, _months_ ago no less. It was bullshit.

"Yeah, well, NOW she's off limits-to both of us." Eric began wiping down glasses while Pam worked circles around him.

"Why? You've gone after married women before. Oh, wait, she's somebody's girlfriend. Alcide? Really? I swear, you boys and your _bro-code_..." Pam rolled her eyes and picked up another tip off the bar.

"Why the fuck does everybody keep thinking that? Alcide is a mile away from her, surrounded by _other_ women. _Obviously_, she isn't with him." He ran his hand through his hair to regain his cool demeanor. "She's our new roommate."

Pam stopped what she was doing to look back at the vision on the dance floor. The first time she had come in, she was wearing very thick glasses and a knit beanie. This new look was far more tantalizing. It was hard to believe Eric was so preoccupied with the girl, she was sure it was only temporary.

"Sorry Eric, it's just that she's Sweet. CLEARLY not your type."

"Yeah? What _is _my type, Pam?" She smirked while handing out another drink.

"Oh, you know, you're an easy, cheap, and _gullible_ kinda guy." Eric turned to her, only slightly offended since she was right about his _usual _tastes.

"Yeah? Well you're not HER type, Pam. She's more of a dick, cock, and _balls_ kinda girl..."

-Now the thing about clubs and the loud pulsing music was that you never could hear people sneak up on you.

"BALLS! Yeah, I'mma HUGE fan!" Eric hung his head feeling somewhat embarassed about Sookie catching him. Pam was giggling, or making a noise somewhat like giggling since beings as Evil as Pam aren't quite capable of making cute giggles. He figured it'd be easier to introduce them than try to explain himself.

"Sookie, meet Pamela Ravenscroft-the cousin. Pam, this is Sookie Stackhouse, roommate extraordinaire." Sookie smiled and extended her hand out to Pam.

"It's so nice to _finally _meet you, Sexy Stackhouse." Pam purred as she grasped Sookie's extended hand. It was sort of out of character for her to "shake hands", but this blonde who had Eric in a twist seemed quite charming.

"Oh, I'm sorry. You must Not have caught my name, it's SOOKIE. Sookie Sexhouse, and we've met before." Pam laughed and looked back at Eric.

"I like her." It was Eric's turn to smirk.

"Yeah, that's a phrase I've been hearing a lot lately." Sookie looked confused. A paying customer at the bar signaled he needed another drink, and since it was technically Eric's establishment, he nodded for Pam to take care of him. Sookie asked for another gin and tonic and Eric wasted no time in pouring one out for her. As he slid the glass towards her, Sookie cupped it with both hands and leaned forward towards Eric.

"Eric," she whispered, "I'm not gonna lie, I feel like I need to go home and scrub myself down with some heavy duty chemicals." With his height and the angle which she was leaning, he had the most spectacular view of her cleavage, but Eric leaned foward against the bar between them and mirrored her position.

"Well, I've washed all of the clothes in that box." He whispered back. Sookie was taken by surprise.

"Really? Why?" Eric shrugged and continued washing glasses in front of him.

"Just in case any of those women showed up the next day for their stuff." Sookie sipped cautiously.

"So you actually _wanted_ some of these ladies to come back?"

"Not exactly. Some might have been good for an encore performance, but I mostly washed it to avoid confrontation..I guess? It's kind of the least I could do, for their _services_."

For a moment, Sookie's face looked disgusted, but then her eyes travelled up to the ceiling, as if thinking, and then smiled and nodded in agreement. Her face could be QUITE expressive.

"I guess that makes sense. If they're gonna put out _that_ easily, they should be prepared for the fact you're obviously not gonna ask them to move in or fall _madly _in loooooove!"

Eric was going to compliment her ability to reason, but Alcide chose that moment to shake off the women hanging all over him to make his way down the bar to sit on an empty stool next to Sookie.

"Eric, I still can't believe you let Sookie wear some other slut's dress." Sookie tensed and looked to Eric. He was even more perturbed than she was. Eric gripped the cloth he used to dry off the glassees in his fist. It wasn't the first time he had ever wanted to punch Alcide, but for some reason this moment just felt different. Sookie could taste the tension in the air and did what she did best, diffused the situation.

"Aww, what's wrong Alcide? You don't think it looks good on me?" She leaned back on her bar stool, shifting her chest towards Alcide. While his eyes were transfixed on Sookie's breasts, she shot a wink at Eric; he could thank her later.

"No cher, you uh-Y-you look great." Sookie threw the rest of her drink back feeling on top of the world! It wasn't everyday she could make someone as handsome Alcide trip over his words. Eric filled her drink and she mouthed a "thanks".

"Omm!" she exclaimed with her mouth full of booze. "Alcide, why aren't you with those ladies from earlier? Do you need a wingman? I'm an excellent wingman." Alcide just laughed and took a swig of his beer.

"Sookie, are you volunteering to help me get laid?" Something about the way he said it irritated Eric.

"Of course! I wish great sex upon All my friends!" While they were immersed in their conversation, nobody noticed a small man sit in the other empty seat beside Sookie.

"Why, Miss Stackhouse, you are the _last _person I expected to run into tonight!" As soon as Sookie spotted his thickly framed glasses and crisp buttoned down shirt, she launched her tipsy-self at him, wrapping her arms around his small frame.

"Stan! What are you doing here? How's your summer going?" He smiled as she pulled away from him.

"Three months off, I can't complain! Did you come here with that boyfriend of yours?" Stan started to scan the crowd in search of Bill's face.

"No, actually. We broke up." Sookie gave him a closed-mouth smile and his eyes widened in surprise.

"That's great! Oh, well that's not GREAT, but I mean...You broke up!" She laughed and nodded. Eric cleared his throat and she suddenly remembered they weren't alone.

"I'm so sorry! Where are my manners? Stan, I'd like you to meet Eric and Alcide, my roommates! Guys, this is Mr. Davis, a fellow educator!" Stan smiled and tried to hide his discomfort as the guys took turns crushing his delicate and clammy hand in their strong, manly handshakes.

"Call me Stan, please. We don't really work in the same area, I'm actually the Sixth Grade Life Science teacher, but we're both frequent volunteers at most functions or fundraisers. Miss Stackhouse here is almost _always _requested as the female chaperone on our field trips!" She blushed. It was easy for Eric to imagine all the young boys falling in love with her and the girls wanting to be her.

"So Miss Stackhouse, you're single now! I guess that means you'll finally be able to attend Comic-con this year! It's in October you know!" Sookie threw her head back and laughed.

"Comic-con! Haha! That was actually one of the first things I thought about when I broke it off with Bill. They say Stan Lee is gonna be there!"

"I HEARD!"

Alcide leaned over to gossip in secret with Eric.

"My god, there are TWO of them!" The guys sat back to watch their nerdy exchange.

"I don't know, if I decide to go I know I want to cosplay, but I have no idea who I'd dress as..."

"Comic-con?" Eric asked. Sookie bit her lip, too uncomfortable to explain it to him.

"Oh Eric, It's not really your _scene_. Believe me." Stan looked stunned.

"Seriously? Eric looks like the kind of guy they would PAY to dress up and take pictures with!" Eric stood up proudly and puffed his chest out smugly to Sookie. She just rolled her eyes and turned her attention back to Stan.

"Please, his ego doesn't need any more stroking, Stan." Eric held back from letting Stan know exactly how she had stroked his _ego _just fine earlier in his car.

"Hey man," Alcide interrupted, "you want a beer or something?"

"Oh no, but thank you, Al!" Eric and Alcide made incredulous faces towards each other. _Al?_ "I actually came here with a few friends of mine and they already took off, I really need to catch up to them. You know how it is, starting out a new MMORPG..." They looked at him like he grew a second head.

"Well, it was great running into you Stan. I'll see you when class starts up again."

"Or, actually, I still have your phone number. How 'bout I just give you a call and we can go out for lunch, or _breakfast_ as I like to call it, sometime later this week?"

"That sounds like fun!" Eric hid his growl by drinking the rest of Sookie's gin and tonic. They waved their goodbyes and Stan took off. Alcide elbowed her lightly.

"So Sook, you've only been single _how long_, and you already got a date?" She rolled her eyes and slid her empty glass back to Eric to refill.

"He's my co-worker, it's not a date."

"SOOKIE, YOU'VE GOT A DATE?" Claudine slid into the seat Stan had recently vacated. "Was it the blonde I sent you up here for in the first place?"

"What blonde?" Eric asked. Claudine eyed him suspiciously and he quickly resumed cleaning some empty glasses that Chow had silently slid in front of him earlier. That guy was a ninja.

"The blonde guy at the other end of the bar," Claude joined the conversation and took a swig of Sookie's drink. She pouted at her recent lack of booze. "Yeah, he's been watching Sook almost the _entire _time we were out there dancing." Leave it to the Crane twins to embarass her properly. Of course EVERYONE turned to see the mystery guy (At The Same Time) which made Sookie blush all over again. The guy looked alright, sort of like a shorter version of Eric with a bit more bulk to him.

"Sookie, please go flirt with him, it's the only thing I want for my birthday present!" Claudine stuck out her bottom lip to persuade Sookie with a super-model pout.

"Oh, I bet that's the ONLY present you want seeing as you're already WEARING those Gucci heels I bought you! I almost used an entire paycheck on those shoes, Claudine!" Claudine smiled an all too guilty smile.

"Sookie, I'm telling you it's a sure thing. Just go for it."

"This isn't even ME." Sookie threw her arms out and motioned to her entire ensemble. It was true, none of what she was wearing was actually hers. "Even if he WAS interested, once he saw the real me he'd run for the hills! I bet you anything I'm not his type."

"I'll take that bet." All eyes snapped to Eric behind the bar. "What, she just bet _anything_?"

"Barmaid, bring me another..." Claudine slid her empty drink glass to Eric to shut him up. He quickly refilled it with a fruity concoction with an orange slice on the side for decoration.

"Get out there Sookie, have some FUN. You're single now!" She looked up into Claude's encouraging eyes and smiled. Steeling her resolve, She stood and adjusted her dress. The more she slid the material down her thighs the more her breasts fought to escape the top. Beautiful. She grabbed what was left of her gin and tonic and swallowed what remained in one gulp, slamming the glass back down on the bar.

"Eric, you be sure to put these on my tab," she motioned to her empty glass and Claudine's fancy booze.

"Of Course," he smiled. She squared her shoulders and sauntered off towards the blonde man at the other end of the bar. As soon as she was out of ear-shot Claudine turned to Eric with fury in her eyes.

"Eric Northman, don't you DARE add these to that poor girl's tab! She is a TEACHER, do you know how much she ma-"

"I'm not gonna charge her." That shut Claudine up real quick. "We just took her card so she'd _think _she has a tab running. I've instructed everyone Not to charge her for the rest of the evening, too. Had to keep this a secret from her or she woulda made a HUGE scene about paying her dues or some shit. I figure by the time she goes home she'll be too wasted to even notice anyway."

Claudine was shocked. That sounded EXACTLY like Sookie Stackhouse. It was weird how well Eric seemed to know her so well after only a few days, all of the guys for that matter appeared to have fallen in love with her. It was comforting to say the least. When she had first volunteered their spare room to Sookie, Claudine was sure they'd harass her about her nerd-ways and bizarre fashion sense, but even though they ran in completely different circles everyone had really taken well to Sookie.

"Hey guys, while she's off..._flirting_, I wanted to run some things by you." Once Eric had everyone's attention he continued. "Why don't we all go and help her move out her stuff from Bill's house tomorrow?" Claudine choked on her beverage. It was actually a great idea and she almost hated herself for not offering to help Sookie out already.

"That's not your JOB, Eric!" Claudine shouted. "I'm her _best friend_, that's MY job!"

"Yeah? Then why haven't you done it yet?" She shut her gaping mouth and sneered at him. Why did Eric Northman always have to be right?

(Meanwhile) Sookie sidled up next to the blonde man and stared into his dark brown eyes.

"Hi, I'm Sookie, can I get you another-" Sookie glanced at his glass to see what he was drinking. She tried to hide her disappointed face when she saw he was drinking _wine_, at a club. Bill used to be the creepy guy that ordered wine at clubs, like an old man.

"No thanks, I'm good. I love your shoes, Sookie!" He sipped his wine and Sookie wasn't quite sure how to proceed. She had lived in the city long enough to spot the signs that this guy wasn't really interested in a _woman_ like herself.

"Um, thank you?"

"Listen, Sookie, _sweetie_, could you do me a favor?" She nodded warily.

"You know that guy you were dancing with earlier? Your friend with the black hair? Yeah, do you think you could give him this for me? Thanks, you're a doll!" Then he sipped his wine and completely ignored her.

She bit her lip to keep from laughing on the walk back to her group. She should have known better than to put herself out there, she was destined to be alone. Everyone was hunched over the bar whispering, most likely about their mission to get her laid, so Sookie cleared her throat to warn them of her arrival. Claudine spun around the fastest and gripped Sookie's shoulders as she maneuvered them further away from the boys.

"SOOKIE! WOW, HEY! THAT WAS FAST! HOW DID IT GO?" Sookie raised her eyebrows at her friend before leaning around Claudine to hand the phone number to Claude.

"Yeaaaah...I don't quite think he was interested." Everyone grimaced and made regretful 'aww' sounds so all she could do was shrug.

"Philippe'?" Claude read off the business card. He scowled at the card and ripped it in half, leaving it on the bar for Eric to clean up.

"What's wrong? He's a good looking guy," she offered.

"Phil? Please. If I was into _that_, I would just date _Eric_." Eric laughed. "Besides, he's obviously blind. The way you're dressed and the way you work that body, even _I'm _beginning to question my sexuality!" Eric had stopped laughing. Sookie flashed Claude a smile of thanks for his funny compliment.

"You're so sweet. But, this isn't really me..." she motioned to the outfit again. "It's a gorgeous dress, but there's a reason it belonged to one of Eric's rejects." He winced at her words. "I think this just means I need to be alone for a while-"

"Oh FUCK that! Eric, get us some shots!" He magically pulled out five shot glasses at record breaking speeds and twirled a clear bottle of booze classily in his large hand before gracefully pouring the liquid equally into each shot glass. It was like art. Claudine shoved the shot into Sookie's hands and Claude shouted "WORLD PEACE!" before they all swallowed.

"Come on Sookie, I wanna DANCE!" Claudine took Sookie's empty shot glass and slammed it onto the bar. "You boys carry on with your...chat...about...sports?" Sookie quizzically studied their reactions and didn't miss Eric's narrowed eyes before Claudine dragged her out onto the dancefloor.

They had been dancing for what felt like forever. Sookie was actually having a blast even after her epic fail at picking up a man for the night. It had been so long since was actually able to go out and dance, Bill wasn't a dancer and would guilt-trip her like crazy, so if she _did _go out with her friends she would have a _horrible_ time and would head home early.

As they danced, Sookie and Claudine worked out a system for over-eager dance partners that got too handsy. As soon as things became REAL on the dancefloor, the dance _victim_ would shoot the other girl a wide-eyed expression so the dancefloor _hero_ would jump in and rescue her with bizarre dance-moves. It was actually hilarious to see a stunning model like Claudine run up to said groper and challenge him to a dance-off with expert moves like the sprinkler or a high-heeled running man! Sookie's moves always got a huge laugh, too. The few times Claudine was dance-molested, her blonde best friend would bust out a Russian Hat Dance or the Pee Wee Herman-like fist bumps in front then behind her back. These moves always caused a big enough scene for the manhandler to "electric slide away" from the crowd.

With their steady flow of booze and all the dancing, Sookie actually started to regret not coming out with Claudine sooner.

"Sookie! Tell me, what do you think of Eric?" Sookie kept on dancing to the music but glanced back to the bar. He was handing two very pretty ladies their drinks and looked up just in time to catch Sookie looking his way. He smiled as their eyes connected and she turned away to hide her blush.

"He's surprisingly sweet. Probably my best friend in the house, but don't tell that to Claude!"

"Ugh, not what I meant! I mean, why don't you hit that? Because, IThinkHe'sReallyIntoYou!"

"What? Eric? No. No! We're just friends."

"You can't be _friends_ with these guys! You don't think that EVERY single one of them has thought about _sleeping _with you?"

"No, I don't. You just think that everyone just wants to sleep with everyone, _all _the time!"

"They DO. That's why I think that."

"Stop it, your brother's GAY, Claudine! I seriously _doubt _he's wanted to sleep with me." Claudine was still dancing but shaking her head in disagreement. "No, you are _not _going to ruin this! I'm Happy! I _like _these guys! I _like _where I live!"

"I'm telling you, HE. GETS. YOU. Trust me."

"Yeah, and I trusted you about that _Philippe'_ guy, the asshole at the bar! And how would _you _know 'he gets me'? You guys talked about _sports _for like, five minutes, tops! And I _suck _at sports!"

"Sookie, just promise me you'll keep an open mind about it. He's there, he's available, and he _looks _like a good fuck." Sookie laughed and kept swaying to the music. "It's an option. A girl could do a _lot_ worse for a rebound."

"Claudine, it's just not a good idea. I have to _live _with the guy! MORE IMPORTANTLY, do you really think a guy like Eric the Northman would ever go for a girl like me?" Claudine eyed Sookie from head to toe, lingering on a few choice curves before striking a pose in her dance and cocking an eyebrow at Sookie. Somehow, quirked eyebrows always seemed sexier on Eric...

Claude slipped in between the two bickering ladies and stole his sister away theatrically as they waltzed about the dancefloor. Sookie fanned herself with her hands and made her way back to the bar for a drink and chat with Eric and Alcide. Eric had her drink waiting for her by the time she sat down.

"Alcide! What are you doing still SITTING here?" She took a swig and kept bouncing to the beat. "Do you wanna dance?" Alcide stiffened in his chair.

"Oh, I uh- I don't dance." Sookie laughed and slapped a hand on his shoulder.

"We're going to a WEDDING next weekend! People dance at weddings."

"Not me, I'm from that town in Footloose." She laughed and took another sip.

"That's fine Alcide, let's just go pick up chicks." He set his beer down and stared at her. "I'm serious. I'm an _amazing _hype man! We've developed this foolproof plan. You just go chat with some girl you think is hot, buy her a drink or whatever, and then _Eric here_ can call you over for a "chat" (she said while actually making Air Quotes). Next, i'll drag Claudine over and we'll sit within earshot and talk about what a _stud_ you are! Trust me, 90% of the time, it works _every time_." Alcide just laughed.

"Sounds like a good plan, man" Eric quipped. "Hey, if it works out well, you might actually have a _real_ date to Tray's wedding instead of pretending with Sookie." Everyone probably should have been offended by his idea, but Sookie was nodding and smiling like it was a fantastic idea!

Alcide finished his beer, nodded at Sookie and made his way back to the same group of ladies that were all over him when he first entered the club.

"You play wingman often, Sookie?" Eric slid her another glass and she slid her empty one back at him.

"Why? You have any available positions?"

"I'm sure I could find plenty of _positions_ for you." She laughed but the blush was still present. "Hey, sorry about that guy earlier. I swore he'd be all over you the rest of the night."

"Nah, I have that effect on guys. THAT REMINDS ME, I believe you owe me, what was it? -_anything_..." Eric spread his arms along the bar and leaned forward to whisper to her.

"You're right, a bet's a bet. So tell me, what does your little heart desire?" Sookie couldn't stop smiling. He was VERY good at this seduction stuff. She figured she might as well try it back, hell, winking at Barry earlier was actually really fun!

"Hmm, _anything_... there's just so many things I could do with you, _Eric_..." He swallowed and his eyes bore into hers. Sookie sat up off her seat, her weight resting on her arms. She leaned even closer to Eric, her lips brushing against his ear lobe. "I can't help but think of all the things you would have asked _me _to do for _you_ if you had won the bet. Oh, Eric, I bet you'd have a big _load _for me.. mmm, yes... That sounds _good_." He felt her smile into his skin before she pulled away from him. "Yep, You can wash my laundry for a month." She took a sip of her drink and looked away like nothing had transpired between them.

Eric was stunned. Who the fuck _was _this girl? How could she possibly be so awkward and geeky one minute then have him hard on his side of the bar the next? He was so confused by what had just happened he didn't notice Nancy run up and engulf Sookie in a hug.

"Sookie, wow! You clean up nice under pressure! Oh, hey Eric." Sookie complimented Nancy's deep green dress and dangerously high heels before she spotted Alcide looking at them from the other side of the bar.

"Oh shit! It's time, Eric! Attack Pattern Delta!" Nancy looked at Eric but he looked even more confused than she did. Sookie rolled her eyes. "It's go-time! Nancy and I are gonna hit the dancefloor and you gotta _summon _Alcide!"

Sookie dragged Nancy out into the crowd and introduced her to Claudine. They had heard plenty about each other from Claude so the introductions went smoothly. After a few minutes dancing, the girls sat at the bar close enough to the brunettes Alcide was chatting with and started to gush about how sexy, sweet, and funny he was. Claudine took it the extra mile by incorporating how great he would be in bed. Apparently she had an eye for things like that.

Four minutes later, pretty lady #1 gave Alcide her number.

The next morning...

Eric woke up far too early for his liking but had a plan for the day and didn't need to lounge around in bed. When he looked at the clock, he was surprised to see it was already 11.

At least Sookie would still be asleep. Last night Claudine had left her on the small loveseat in Eric's office to get herself some "birthday sex", so Sookie curled up into a ball and passed out until Eric finished up minor paperwork and carried her to his car. She was quite light and easy to maneuver around, the only time he received any suspicious glares was when he carried her past the doormen at the loft and entered the elevator. So usually Eric's dates could walk in (and storm out) of the place on their own, that didn't mean he had to resort to hot unconscious women.

He threw off his covers and rubbed the sleep out of his eyes. He stumbled into a pair of jeans and threw on a white t-shirt before making his way to the bathroom. He took care of the majority of his morning hygiene issues and moved to the kitchen for a cup of coffee. Sookie's bedroom door was still closed, but Claude and Alcide were already up. Claude was dressed and sweetening his own cup of coffee and Alcide was at the dining room table lacing up his sneakers.

"Think we should wake Sookie? She'll probably want a cup of coffee before we force her to do this." Eric said as he reached for a mug.

"No need." Claude said before taking a sip. "She's not in her bed, we woke up and she was gone, but she started the coffee maker before she left." Eric actually became worried. She hadn't said anything about PLANS on a Sunday morning. When they discussed everything the night before, surely Claudine would have told them if Sookie wouldn't be available?

Just then, Sookie, with her great timing, walked through the front door. She was wearing black yoga pants with the hot pink elastic waist, a white tank top that read "Aperture Laboratories" (no one at the apartment understood), and a very visible black and white sports bra underneath. In her hand was an enormous "Big Gulp" from 7-11 that she was taking sips from.

"Morning Boys!" She smiled cheerfully. Everybody was checking her out, even Claude. "Went for a morning run, wayyy overdue for a workout." She took another sip of her soda.

"Sookie, I'm no expert, but I think you're doing it wrong." Claude pointed to her Big Gulp cup and Sookie laughed loudly and shrugged.

"You guys are up early! What are we doing today?" She took a seat at one of the mismatched chairs at the dining table next to Alcide. Claude and Eric exchanged somewhat worried glances.

"Well it's a good thing you're sitting down while we tell you this." Eric set down his coffee cup and continued. "Sookie. We're gonna go get your things." It was silent for a minute, not even any sounds of Sookie slurping from her giant cup.

"What? No no, that's alright, guys. I was just going to go another day, ya know, whenever Bill isn't home?" Sookie was immersed in dejavu' as all three of the guys crossed their arms in front of their chests. Sookie set her drink down and looked at the floor, avoiding their angry glares.

"We're all going with you, Alcide's bringing his truck so we can even get the big stuff you left behind. The twins are taking Claudine's Audi, and I'm going to ride with you, just in case you decide to turn back."

Now Sookie was pissed. How could he possibly be so high-handed? She crossed her arms over _her _chest and huffed childishly.

"So you just planned this all out? Why don't you just plan out my entire life while you're at it?"

"I'm glad you said something, I have you set up all the way to 2016, maybe we can pencil in some spontaneity, maybe a trip abroad two years from now."

"ERIC! I don't see why this is so important to you! Why is this important to ANY of you? Just who do you think you ar-"

"We're your friends Sookie." Eric said softly. Well that was unexpected. It actually touched her heart hearing it out loud. During her years with Bill she had lost plenty of friends, _especially _those of the male persuasion. Growing up she had always had more in common with boys, what with the action films and video games, but Bill had put his foot down about her associating with any guys when they were together. It had just been so long since she had actually madea friend, much less three. She had to blink back the happy tears.

"Come on Sook," Alcide nudged her. "You don't really want to do this alone, do you?" She shook her head. Claudine then burst into the apartment with large sunglasses on and a large coffee in hand, fighting her hangover no doubt.

"Well, let's get this show on the road ladies! I've already vomitted most of the fruit decorations from my drinks last night, so I'm good to go! Oo, Sookie, good idea! I figured you'd dress it up a little before running into your ex again, but yoga pants show you're just FINE without him! It's perfect! You wanna be dressed nice and comfy when you move out of his life for good." Sookie's shoulders slumped.

Everyone started making their way out of the apartment and Sookie grabbed her enormous soda as she trudged behind them. It took everything she had to focus only on their good intentions and not the anxiety she felt about _really _confronting Bill.

Almost everyone was already in their respective vehicles except for Eric. He stood, lost, checking out all of the cars in the parking lot. Sookie stood next to him for a few minutes since he was the brains of the operation, but soon realized he had stopped because he had no clue which car was hers. She blushed again and led him to a very old white Toyota with crazy Asian characters along the side. Eric raised a puzzled eyebrow as he nodded to the Japanese decals on his side of the vehicle.

"It's sort of a long story." Sookie had never been that nervous over her car before, but for some strange reason, Eric's opinion mattered to her. He slid into her passenger seat and started laughing as he buckled himself in. She found it next to impossible to make eye contact. Finally Sookie took a deep breath then drove out of the lot, the other cars in tow. Eric noticed everyone else's confused expressions (except for Claudine) over Sookie's vehicle.

She was nervous, that much was painfully obvious. Her hands were gripping her steering wheel so tight her fingernails were leaving impressions on her palms, and her jaw was clenching every few minutes.

"Sooooo, Sookie, how'd you end up with this car? Steal it from someone in China Town?"

"No. Those are _Japanese _letters on the door, _Eric_. It's Kanji. And, it's just- No, ya know what? Forget it. I don't think you'd really get it, anyway!" She shifted gears and started driving even faster while weaving through traffic.

"Why do you always do that? You act like I'm not cool enough for your-"

"What?" She turned on him, anger splayed across her features. "It's YOU, you're the one who's TOO cool to understand my nerd...quirks! Eric! We're from two different worlds. Listen, I've known guys like you my whole life, and guys like you make _fun_ of girls like me." Sookie had started out yelling at him, but by the end her voice was barely above a whisper.

"Guy's like me, huh?" She nodded, still fuming. He sat back into his seat. Sure he probably wouldn't have pursued a girl like Sookie based on her appearance before, but every day just _being _in her presence only made him want her more. If it were possible, he'd travel back in time to kick his own ass for not noticing a woman as seemingly perfect as Sookie. Who cares if she was with Bill at the time? He couldn't help but wonder just where he'd be if he had somehow found her first.

In any case, there was no way he could win her over in their present state: not speaking. She actually thought he'd judge her for being too nerdy but the reality was he wanted to know _everything _about her, starting with her bizarre connections to Asian culture.

"I had horrible acne." Silence.

"What?" she asked incredulously.

"I had acne," he shrugged. "And I was tall, _too _tall. I had to drink weight gain shakes with tons of icecream during high school. Probably didn't help with the acne..." Sookie continued to gape at him.

"Oh yeah, Sookie. It was rough. I spent my entire allowance on Doritos and games at the arcade every week. I had every Nintendo game _ever _made and practically slept with my GameBoy, except you couldn't really see the screen at night. Then my cousin, my very _gay _cousin, Pam, had to be my date to Prom. My first _real_ date wasn't until college-" Sookie interrupted him with her soft laughter. She put a hand on his shoulder while she continued to giggle.

"Eric," She looked at him and he shot a pathetic smirk her way. "Aww, things couldn't have been _that _bad!" He blinked at her, obviously disagreeing with the statement. "And Pam's HOT, I'm sure all those other acne covered teenagers were OVERCOME with Jealousy!" He chuckled.

"You know, Sookie, I wasn't sure how you'd feel about us all springing this "Operation Moving Day" on you, so I- I sort of...made you something." Sookie found his uncertainty endearing.

Eric leaned towards her, actually his entire body was suddenly angling towards her. She stiffened as her eyes went wide, suddenly focusing comletely on the road, unsure of his movements. Then he pulled a disc from his back pocket. He opened it's case and slid the cd into her car stereo and turned the volume up.

"Glad you have a cd player in here, woulda been screwed if this old Toyota only had a tape-deck." The car was then filled with guitar intro to "Eye of the Tiger" by Survivor. A grin spread across her face.

"Eric! You made me a mix cd!" He had never seen her smile so brightly before. Honestly, it took his breath away a bit. "I don't think anyone has ever made me one before." He shrugged like it wasn't such a big deal but his satisfied smirk completely gave him away.

"Yeah, well. Just a couple songs to keep you pumped up, and maybe a few to make you laugh." Sookie was completely oblivious, but Eric noticed she started to loosen up. Her hands didn't have the same death grip on the steering wheel at least.

"So my car," she began, "it's sort of an inside joke." She glanced his way and her shoulders tensed when she found she held his complete attention. "When I was little, I used to watch this anime, er-cartoon? This, _show_, called Initial D. It's about this boy who's dad runs a tofu shop at the top of Mount Akina He has him make these tofu deliveries so he drives this curvey road every day and gets really good. He sort of become a badass at drifting. Anyway, he's just this nobody kid with no goals and ends up this legendary racer.

Anyway, not a whole lot of people in Bon Temps, Louisiana watch much Japanese Animation, 'cept for my brother and I, and then in middle school I found out my friend Tony had watched the show. 'Tone' was a major car fanatic and we used to joke about having dual ownership of a vehicle one day. Whenever I graduated high school, my Gran and Jason surprised me with this car, and Tony put the same decals on the sides like they were on Initial D! They say "Fujiwara Tofu Shop". I just thought it was so sweet, especially because we hadn't talked about the show for _years_!" Eric was smiling and did his best to disguise his jealousy towards this "tony" fellow. "Actually, I had just started seeing Bill at the time and he _hated _everything about the car, but since it was all a gift I convinced him to let me keep it."

"So he wanted to buy you a different car?" Sookie snorted.

"Hell no, he wanted me to trade it in and buy _myself_ a new car. Ughk! All these years of dealing with his mega-Guilt Trips! I swear, the guy made more than enough to support us both, but would practically make me Cry if I ever spent any of my own money for something for _myself_. What a douche-box, how did I never notice any of this before?" Sookie was breathing crazy and driving fast again. She didn't realize she was ranting on and on until Eric rested a hand on her knee.

"I'm so sorry, Eric. You've just-you've done so much for me, and you're always helping me out, and I'm just here screaming, ranting, and man-bashing in front of you..." She blushed.

"Hey, you said it yourself, he's not a man, the guy's a douche." She smiled but didn't take her eyes off the road. "Sookie, do you mind me asking why you were with him in the first place?" She sighed and shrugged.

"Well, I wasn't very pretty or popular growing up. People called me "Jason's little sister" for as long as I could remember. Anyway, Bill was always around, he was our neighbor. He was sort of the first person to ever ask me out. Bill knew my family, and he was sort of popular, he played sports and was voted "most likely to succeed" so I didn't see any reason _not _to go out with him. I'm not sure how he did it, but man, he had me CONVINCED I had somehow won over this perfect man _way_ out of my league! Gran kept trying to tell me I was too young to be tied down like that, and Jason hated _every_ guy interested in me. I just assumed they didn't want me to be happy. Next thing ya' know, we were in college together, then he got offered a great position here in New York, and he had asked me to move with him.

My family and I fought because of it. We ended up not speaking for _weeks_ when I moved here with him, but I swore he would propose. You don't just ask someone to move 10 states away with you without the intention of marrying them, right? But no, years went by. I broke it off with him a time or two before whenever my friends would remind me how crazy our whole relationship was. Somehow that asshole always managed to trick me into feeling bad for my _indiscretions_ and FORGAVE me, I can't believe I was so dumb. How could everyone else see him as this scum bag while I thought I won some sort of prize?"

"I get it. This guy's your kryptonite." Sookie nodded and worried her bottom lip. "You still see this guy as you did back when you were an awkward and unconfident kid. Now you just need to see him as you are _now_. You're a smart, self-reliant, stubborn, stong, hilarious, stunning woman with an amazing rack who doesn't have the _time _to deal with an unfaithful douchebag too _stupid _to see what a great thing he had."

Now Eric was the one venting.

He cooly ran a hand through his hair. Sookie went over his words in her head, trying to focus and remember the parts that would help her stay strong through her meeting with Bill.

Eric's mix cd must have done the trick, because Sookie didn't freak out throughout the drive until she re-entered her old neighborhood. This was the place she had called home for so long. As she pulled up to their old blue and white house, she couldn't miss Bill's silver Sebring parked in the car-port.

She turned the keys in the ignition but didn't make a move to exit the car. Eric waited patiently but once he saw her hands shaking he couldn't help but place his larger hands over hers and give them a small squeeze.

"Eric," she whispered. Sookie bit her lip and risked looking up into his beautiful blue eyes. "I'm nervous."

Before he could tell her something encouraging like Mel Gibson in Braveheart, they both jumped as something Slammed into Sookie's driver side window. Sookie almost screamed before she turned her head to see Claudine's hot pink bra and cleavage smashed up against the glass. Sookie laughed as Claudine danced against the window, the naked skin of her stomach "squeaking" as it rubbed against the surface.

"Fuckin' Claudine!" Sookie took her hands away from Eric's so she could cover her mouth and stifle her laughter.

Claudine stepped away from the glass and pulled her shirt back over her exposed chest. She opened Sookie's door and like a gentleman she helped her out of the vehicle.

Sookie took deep soothing breaths as she made her way over what was once her front yard. Steve and Sarah Newlin, the neighbors across the street, were gawking at all of the strangers and the scene that would probably ensue.

"SHEESH," Claudine said, speaking loud enough for everyone to hear, "you'd THINK they could at least PRETEND to be doing yard work instead of just standing and staring!"

Sookie stood in front of her front door, tugging her tank top down. In a way it was comical yet comforting having four disturbingly beautiful people standing behind her as she shakily rang the doorbell. Moments later, Bill opened up.

"_Sookeh_," She internally groaned at the way he drawled her name. "I'm glad you've come to your senses." Bill crossed his arms over his chest as he blocked the doorway. He was wearing a deep green polo shirt, a loose fitting pair of khakis and some detestable penny loafers. Sookie rolled her eyes as she remembered how much Bill openly criticized her wardrobe when he dressed like a Florida retiree. His eyes lit up as he spotted her best friend's cleavage. "Claudine! Hey, you're looking good.."

"Blehk." Claudine gagged as she brushed past Bill. "It's all back this way, guys!" They each walked into the house but whenever Alcide entered he shouldered Bill forcefully. Bill's body bounced off of the wall and it took him a few minutes before he gathered his bearings. Sookie stopped at the end of the hall, her anger overwhelming her.

"Bill! What the HELL? What did you do to all the stuff I packed?"

"I put it all back where it belongs, _dear_. Sookie, who are all these people and why are they in our home? Can we have a moment to talk?"

"Honestly, there's really nothing to talk about. These are my roommates and we're here to pick up the rest of my things." Bill was pouting like a child and Sookie began tugging at her hair in frustration. Claudine stepped in between the two of them to get everyone started.

"Well, I'll get to work packing up all your wardrobe, Sookie. Don't worry, I'll get those ghastly "teacher" clothes too! If you want, maybe you can start in the kitchen, I know you've been missing that coffee grinder. Have the guys get all the big or heavy stuff."

"Right. Alcide, think you can help me with this funky wing-backed chair?"

"Ooo, I forgot about that chair!" Claudine Squealed. "That's gonna look so good at your guys' place!"

"What? You aren't staying with Claudine?" The girls ignored him and shared a sweet secret handshake before walking in separate directions. Bill was starting to get angry, his fists opening and clenching.

"Come on, Bro," Claudine waved over at Claude, "let's get the boxes and tape from my car." Claude shrugged and followed her back outside while Alcide and Eric followed Sookie into the store room/spare bedroom.

"Sookie, please! Be reasonable." She held her arm out to keep Bill a good deal away from herself.

"This is the chair Alcide, it's kinda shaped too weird for me to carry on my own." He nodded and took it out the room effortlessly by himself. Sookie looked around and figured she should retrieve her large desktop computer hidden inside the closet since she couldn't very well take Bill's laptop.

The closet door always put up a fight. Sookie really put her back into sliding the broken door open enough to save her computer, but it would only move about an inch or so before rocking back into it's original place. Eric stepped up behind her, _very_ close behind her, as he placed his hands on the closet door as well. The two of them struggled rocking it back and forth, and Bill actually grunted in indignation when he caught Eric sniffing and smiling into her blonde hair.

Finally the door slid open and Sookie lost her balance from wrenching it back, Eric caught her easily. The minute her back slammed into his chest, his arms instinctively wrapped around her over her shoulders. It all happened quickly, but he definitely felt her body relax into his embrace.

"Daddy's gotcha-" he joked. Sookie giggled before shimmying out of his grasp.

Sookie leaned down into the closet and tried to ease the giant box containing her computer towards her so she could lift it out. As she bent into the confined space, Eric blatantly checked out her ass in her tight yoga pants. Alcide came back into the room and also got a great glimpse and licked his lips, winking at Sookie's ex. Everything was going according to plan and Bill didn't know what to shout about first.

"SOOKIE! Jesus, what are you doing?" Bill stood in between Sookie's ass and the men's lustful gazes, seething.

"Damnit! This is too heavy, can one of you help me out a little?" Alcide pushed Bill out of his way and Sookie moved enough for him to reach into the tiny closet. Bill exaggerated the force of Alcide's push and threw himself into a wall and waited for Sookie's sympathetic response. That reaction never came.

Alcide hoisted the entire HP box up over one shoulder and waited for Sookie to give him something else to carry. Her eyes widened in appreciation of his impressive male form. She reached into the closet and handed him the box that held her printer and a ream of printer paper. Alcide took the hardware to his truck. Sookie continued to pull boxes out of the closet and Eric would take them from her and stack them by size to pack into one of the many vehicles later. Bill was at his wit's end. He clutched Sookie's wrist tightly to keep her from securing any more of her old belongings.

"Sookie, I don't condone this! These men are hostile and violent, you're gonna stay here until you find a safer place to live."

"Excuse me...?" Eric dropped the box he was holding, fully preparing to kick Bill's ass. It was then that Eric realized Sookie wasn't like most girls and was fairly capable of taking care of herself. Sookie rotated her wrist around until she gripped Bill's wrist back, before he knew it, Sookie had twisted his arm around and had it pinned behind his back in a very awkward and painful position.

"Bill, just calm down!" He struggled against her. "Stop, you made me do this." She pulled his arm back a bit more until he half cried out in pain. "Bill, listen, you no longer have ANY say in where I live! So far the only person to even lay a _hand_ on me has been YOU." Sookie released her hold on him, shoving him forward in the process. Bill stumbled a few feet away and spun back, rubbing his tender arm, staring daggers at Sookie. Once he noticed Eric's threatening stance he stomped out of the room, leaving Sookie and Eric behind.

As soon as he was gone Sookie let out the breath she didn't realize she was holding. Eric closed the gap between them and rubbed her (lethal) arms reassuringly.

"You're full of surprises, Stackhouse. Hell, you might even be able to kick _my _ass!" She gave him a weak smile before pushing her glasses back up the bridge of her nose. They both shared a laugh then started grabbing the boxes from the closet.

Alcide came back into the room sweating and started unbuttoning his green and white flannel shirt. Sookie tried in vain to hide her blush by picking up one of the many boxes her and Eric had compiled. Alcide simply laughed before grabbing a stack of surprisingly heavy boxes himself.

"I'm sorry Alcide, a lot of those are my books. Probably weighs a ton," she grumbled. Eric reached for the last pile of boxes and followed them outside to the vehicles. Sookie's couple of boxes were lighter than everyone else's, so she quickly dumped them into her Toyota before sprinting to help Alcide who was struggling to lower the tailgate of his truck.

"Let me help you, you're going to throw out your back!" Sookie lowered the tailgate and hop/sat on it before spinning on her ass to stand in the bed of Alcide's truck. Alcide and Eric dropped the boxes they were carrying onto the tailgate and Sookie made quick work of carrying and organizing the boxes efficiently. Finally, all those years of Tetris were being put to good use! The boxes she couldn't lift she simply pushed across the truck into their new location. Claude and Claudine even dropped off a few boxes full of Sookie's clothes and linens.

Finally, with the boxes and her fancy chair pushed out of the way for bigger furniture, Sookie stood straight and stretched her back. She found Bill's ominous figure scowling at her from the small porch and she couldn't help but stare daggers right back. Eric retreated from the sun into the house and Sookie could have sworn he was flexing, maybe putting on a show for Bill and the Newlins? As she was about to jump down from the bed of the truck, she saw Alcide's boyish grin then felt something sweep her legs. Sookie's hands covered her face and she squeezed her eyes shut, shrieking as she plummeted to her death, or so she thought-

Alcide magically caught her in his arms and was carrying her bridal style. His laughter made her bounce about and she struggled to catch the breath that her fear had stolen from her.

"What the HELL! Alcide, were you raised by _WOLVES_?" He continued to laugh as he twirled her about before dropping her feet back onto the ground. Sookie tried to adjust her clothing and hide her blush that appeared from her intimate embrace with her hunky roommate in his thin white wifebeater.

She really _did_ want to be mad at the guy, but she couldn't help but laugh. The entire situation from moving out and accosting Bill (who had it coming!) had made her irritable and somewhat bossy towards all of her friends, and they were only there to help. At least Alcide's playfulness reminded her that _this _sort of behavior was unacceptable for a Miss Sookie Stackhouse!

Finally her giggles overcame her and Alcide's booming laugh soon joined her.

"I'm such an idiot, Alcide! Did you see me? What kind of person would cover their _face_ while falling? Why the hell didn't I put my arms out to catch myself?" Her laughter brought everyone else out from inside the house. Bill glared at Alcide and stormed around his home towards the back yard. Alcide did a poor job of hiding his smile at Bill's retreating figure.

"What'd I miss?" Claudine asked innocently. Sookie just shook her head dismissively as she joined her friend, wrapping an arm around her waist.

"What else were you thinking of bringing Sook?"

Sookie pointed out the rest of the things to take including an eccentric mirror, framed artwork and pictures, peculiar fridge magnets, her Star Wars toaster that burned Vadar's head onto your toast, her bicycle, and a simple wooden table that had been painted white that she'd planned to use as her desk.

Bill had tried desperately to get Sookie alone but his every attempt was thwarted by her new housemates. It didn't take long for her to notice how overly affectionate they all became whenever he would lurk around her. Claude would massage her shoulders and remind her what a great job she was doing, Alcide would pick up her blonde hair and blow on her neck claiming it was "such a hot day", and Bill's last attempt at cornering Sookie ended with Eric hoisting her up over his shoulder as he carried (and spanked) her while she kicked and laughed right out of the room.

All in all, officially moving out had become practically _enjoyable _while Sookie found herself surrounded by so many people who loved her. Soon everyone was set to drive back to the loft, and JUST before Sookie backed out of the driveway she remembered one small thing she just couldn't live without. "_Fuck_," she muttered as she leapt out of the white Toyota and ran back inside the house. Eric never even got the chance to ask what was up.

She sprinted into the room, and sure enough, there it was. It was a beautiful antique key with a light pink ribbon laced through it. It had once belonged to Sookie's mother and Gran had given it to Sookie before she had left Home with Bill Compton. Sookie's hands wrapped gently around the key and she held it tightly to her chest chastising herself for almost forgetting such a beautiful gift. Just as she turned to leave the door slammed shut behind her and she nearly jumped out of her skin.

"What? Weren't even planning to say Goodbye, _Sookeh_?" She let out a shaky breath before they _both_ jumped at the sound of Eric's fist pounding on the other side of the door.

"SOOKIE! ARE YOU OKAY? WHAT'S GOING ON IN THERE?"

"I'M FINE ERIC! It's fine..." Sookie gripped the key harder, seeking some extra strength from her family. "You're absolutely right Bill. This is goodbye." She tried to move past him but he blocked her with his body.

"You're being irrational, Sookie. You haven't even tried to talk to me! You haven't even given me a chance to explain. Did our relationship mean nothing to you? What would your Gran say if she knew you just threw all those years out the window?"

"Gran's fine with it." Bill's mouth opened in surprise. "We've actually talked more these past few days than we have in years." Sookie tried to leave while he was still confounded, but he stood his ground.

"I know what you're playing at here, I'm not stupid. I KNOW that Claude is Claudine's brother. These _men_ you brought here, let me guess, his gay model boyfriends you hired to dote on you and touch you like some kind of whore?"

"BILL!" Eric growled from the other side of the door.

"IT'S OKAY," she shouted out to him. Sookie decided to approach the situation carefully. She held a hand out in front of her and spoke in a clear but gentle voice. "It's over Bill."

Bill shifted uncomfortably, he opened his mouth to speak but Sookie shook her head at him. "I have a place to live. And the guys, well...I don't know why they're all acting so handsy, but-"

"That's right, an ACT Sookie! Do you really think men like THAT would really be interested in a woman of your size and upbringing?"

"No, I suppose not..." Outside the door Eric could not _believe _what he was hearing. "That's not the point, Bill. It's over, I'm making a new life for myself. They're my roommates, and I love them." Bill started to grind his teeth together. "_All_ of them. To tell you the truth, I'm _glad_ you cheated on me! I would have married you, ya' know that? And then you would have hurt me far worse, wouldn't you Bill?"

Bill couldn't even look at her. He turned his attention to outside the window. Sookie gripped the Stackhouse family Key harder and moved to the door, this time

Bill didn't try to stop her. She silently unlocked the door and opened it to find Eric staring down at her with an expression she couldn't quite discern but before she could contemplate his look, Eric was all over her.

Her eyes shot open as one of his gigantic hands dragged the back of her head forward, his lips collided with hers as his other arm snaked around her waist, pulling her tightly against his body.

He smelled amazing.

From the way his fingers caressed her scalp to the way his tongue firmly massaged her soft lips, it was so easy for her to get caught up in the kiss. Sookie's hands involuntarily travelled up his chest over his neck and cupped the sides of Eric's slightly scruffy face as she pulled him impossibly closer to her as she opened her mouth for him. Her eyes rolled back into her head as his tongue conquered hers. Hands down, this was the best kiss Sookie had ever had! She moaned into him and Eric breathed in deeply through his nose, never wanting to take his mouth away from hers... that was until he heard Bill shout "WHAT THE FUCK" from the bedroom behind them.

Eric hesitantly pulled away and their blue eyes met. Sookie smiled, thinking about how looking into his eyes was like listening to the Beatles for the first time.

"Did that feel like an _act_, Sookie?"

Sookie was suddenly dropped back down onto the wood floors and felt almost a gust of air as Eric moved quickly past her into the bedroom and slammed the door behind him.

She stood there like an idiot, panting and touching her fingertips to her now swollen lips. Then, almost as if she was struck by lightning, she spun around and reached for the doorknob. Eric had locked himself inside the bedroom...with Bill.


	8. Chapter 8

**Thank you for your patience! Got another chapter up, FINALLY! I really do appreciate all the reviews, so keep 'em coming! Um, I own nothing from Fox or Charlaine Harris.. so Enjoy!**

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><p>Once Eric flicked the lock, he turned on Bill. Every step he took towards him made Bill back up slowly until he was pushed up against the farthest (furthest?) bedroom wall.<p>

Pathetic. The guy was a creep _and _a coward. Eric had wanted to kick his ass since the minute he first laid eyes on those ridiculous sideburns, but deep down he knew Sookie would lose her shit and blame herself if any of the guys really hurt the stupid fuck. If she really wanted to, Sookie could have kicked his ass All On Her Own. Eric just had to remind the short son of a bitch that he was no longer needed in Sookie's life, and scaring the guy would just be an added bonus for him.

Eric got deep into Bill's personal space, so much so that every breath he took would blow Bill's old fashioned hair cut out of place. Eric smirked as he braced one arm against the wall over Bill's shoulder and whispered to him in a low voice so that Sookie wouldn't be able to hear them from outside the door.

"You fucked up, Billy-Boy. You do know that right?" Bill swallowed but wouldn't answer him. "See I know all about guys like you. Possessive, controlling. Tell me, do you get off running every single detail of her life?"

"Who are you? You don't know us or how our relationship works!"

"Maybe not, but I know Cheating doesn't really WORK too well in a relationship." Bill looked away from him. "You really are a fucking idiot! Believe me, I _know _Sookie isn't your average girl. She's smart, sexy as fuck, funny, and don't get me started on the _secrets _I've seen hiding under those jeans and t-shirts."

Bill tried to push Eric away from him, but Eric was planted firmly in place. The fact that his shove didn't even move the Viking an inch made Bill start to sweat. Sookie's giant blonde roommate was strong, _very_ strong and Bill had just laid his hands on him. He started to tremble but stoned his features in an attempt to hold his ground while Eric continued.

"See, my theory is you can't _handle _a woman like Sookie. Why else would you cheat on her? Who would cheat on a girl that makes blanket forts, speaks Chinese, and carries snacks in that embarassingly huge purse? Why would you _ever _Fuck Over a woman who'd rather pay for her own shit instead of using every asshole she comes across for everything he's worth? With a body like _that_, you _know_ she could, too!"

Bill's jaw was clenching from time to time, but he didn't have the balls to look Eric in the eye.

"I'll just get to the point, Bill. There's really only Two things I need to say to you. The first thing I wanna say...is Thank You."

Bill's head snapped to attention and Eric grinned.

"Honestly, Thank You for fucking up _so _badly that you've pretty much gift wrapped the most beautiful and incredibly perfect woman and delivered her _right _into my apartment." Bill's face contorted with rage and Eric genuinely smiled.

"You've really made it too easy, Bill! If it wasn't for all of your bullshit she put up with for all of these years, she'd never appreciate how fucking happy I plan to make her. Shit, as soon as she sees me treat her with the respect and tenderness a woman like Sookie Deserves, she's gonna think I'm the fucking Messiah compared to you!

Lastly, now I want you to pay close attention here Bill, I want you to -No. You're GOING to Stay-The fuck-Away from Her. She's made it _very_ clear that you two are OVER, so you'd better get it through that tiny Brain of yours that there's _Nothing _you can say to that girl that'll make her forget how badly you fucked her over. So, no showing up with _flowers _at her work, no stalking her at the fucking grocery store, and if I _ever _catch wind of another mind-fuck of a voicemail, you're gonna wish you were _never _fucking born." Eric actually surprised himself at how well he could act so calm, after all, his fist was just _itching_ to punch the douchebag in the face.

"Now," he cracked a fake smile down at Bill, "do you have any questions?" Bill cleared his throat and stared into Eric's volatile blue eyes.

"Yeah, how long has she been fucking you?"

-Now that was the absolute worst thing he could have said to Eric-

Eric's other fist SLAMMED into the wall next to Bill's face. Bill went white and his body began shaking uncontrollably in fear. Eric _struggled _notto call him a Pussy.

"Ya know, I'm not exactly sure how that's really your business, but rest assured, Billy Boy, Imma take my _sweet_ time with her. See, I plan to explore every single _inch _of her body, and I'll discover all those secret spots that'll make her Scream and _Beg _for me to make her mine. And I Will..Make her Mine."

Bill's jaw dropped.

Eric's grin returned. Intimidating this small man was actually kind of amusing! Hell, Eric actually ended up revealing his whole plan for Sookie to him like some sort of Bond villain!

Eric removed his hands from the wall and tapped Bill's cheek twice before walking away from him. He waved over his shoulder to the dickhead without looking back and opened the door to find a bewildered looking Sookie Stackhouse.

"Eric," she whispered, "Are you...? What did you-you didn't hurt him did you?" Eric smiled down at her and shook his head.

"Come on," he said, taking her by the hand and leading her back to her car. "We're done here."

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><p>The majority of the ride home was spent in Silence before Sookie had to go and ruin it...<p>

"Eric, we need to talk..." he closed his eyes and exhaled heavily.

"So talk."

"About that kiss..."

"Sookie,"

"No Eric, we're adults and we need to talk about this! I don't know about you, but...!" she blurted out.

"ARE YOU SERIOUS?" She couldn't answer him. She couldn't even make eye contact with him! Eric was suddenly feeling more aggravated than he had been while dealing with Bill. "Are you fucking Serious right now? Because I was the one who kissed YOU, Sookie. Are you trying to say "I" made a mistake?"

"Yes. Well, NO! I mean-don't put words in my mouth! It's just things are complicated...WITH ME, right now, and we LIVE Together! You know you're a very important friend to me, so maybe it'd be best to just pretend it never happened?"

To say he was pissed would be an understatement. He was livid.

"Well, if that's how you feel about it _Sookie _I'm not going to WASTE MY TIME trying to convince you that you're wrong..."

They listened to the radio as they ignored each other. Sookie couldn't bring herself to apologize like she wanted to. Eric of course continued to steal glances at her beautiful profile. Her eyebrows practically danced upon her face as she thought. From time to time he would even forget he was supposed to be angry with her, especially the times when she would blush and hold her breath.

A part of Eric considered cutting his losses and just giving up the notion of possessing The Sookie Stackhouse. She had already proved to be quite a handful! She came out of Nowhere with _more _than enough baggage, she won over all of his closest friends in a matter of _days_, made him rethink _everything _he ever thought he wanted in a woman, and Now that he had kissed her with Everything He Had...Now she suddenly wanted to pretend it had never happened?

Yep, it would definitely be easier to continue his current protocol of casual sex with attractive acquaintainces, but deep down he knew there was no way he could just ignore the feelings this bitch stirred up. For the life of him he couldn't recall the last time he had really _felt_ this strongly about _anyone_. This strangely simple yet complex woman had awakened something within him, and even if SHE was keen on pretending there's nothing there between them, Eric knew better than to lie to himself.

He sighed heavily as he tried to see where Sookie was coming from. Maybe the timing was all wrong? Bill didn't exactly set the same mood for romance as Barry White or Marvin Gaye. Even so, after dealing with her shitty ex, Sookie had _definitely _responded to their kiss. In fact, Sookie Stackhouse was the greatest kisser he had ever known! -then again, Eric was probably biased because of how badly he wanted to fuck her.

The answer became painfully obvious; Sookie was intimidated by a man of his...nature. Funny how being called a "slut" was never a big deal before Sookie moved in. Let's be honest, the lost and found box in his closet didn't do much for his reputation either.

Eric paid extra attention to the road as they continued back to the loft. Driving Sookie's car was like driving a toy. The back-seat had been filled with so many boxes that Eric wasn't able to push his chair back as far as it would go. So there he sat, uncomfortably cramped in a small space and head-over-heels for the blushing woman next to him; lost as to what his next move should be. He just had to have her... Sookie would have to be Gently coerced into this and he almost scowled at the thought of moving "slowly" with his intentions.

As Eric stewed on what to say to her, Sookie, who was cowering against her passenger side door, was also dying to say something to make things right. She had never seen him like this: quiet. He was hands-down her favorite roommate, he always managed to be there for her whenever she needed him, always quick with a joke, and now they weren't even on speaking terms!

She nibbled her lip recalling what an amazing kiss they shared, which only made her feel more ashamed. Eric had only become such a great kisser because of his _numerous_ partners willing to help him practice! With all of his experience there was no way she could keep him interested for long. Hell, even Bill strayed and cheated on her and he wasn't even _half_ as good looking as Eric!

He was gorgeous, who _wouldn't _want to be with a man like Eric? A part of her really wanted to throw caution to the wind and see what other _skills_ he possessed, the part of her that hadn't been laid in _months_, but could she really be "O.K." with just being another notch on his belt?

No. Maybe? She was raised to be lady, not _loose_ with her body, but Gran seemed to be encouraging her to live a little. Claudine swears up and down that Rebound Sex is the way to go. She had to admit, just getting a rise out of Alcide at the club (making him trip over his words) made her feel powerful, sexy even! And now the fact that Eric was _still _acting upset over a Kiss (an AMAZING Kiss) was proof that he was at least a little bit into her, maybe even enough to sleep with her. OBVIOUSLY he wouldn't be as into her as much as she obsessed over him, but he seemed to be interested enough to maybe fool around. Maybe. Sookie blushed and shook the thought away.

They pulled into the parking lot and Eric expertly parked her car at the closest available spot. Claudine skipped over to the vehicle, excitedly (and inadvertently) saving Sookie from herself. Sookie was dragged out of her seat and could have sworn she saw Eric open his mouth to say something, but as she turned back to him he was already starting to unload her belongings from the back seat.

All the roommates helped out and managed to drag her possessions to her bedroom in record time. Claude sprinted for the showers, refusing to lounge around in his own filth. As the rest of the roommates started dinner (Eric's famous spaghetti prepared in his new wok) Claudine excused herself and made a few racist jokes about food preparation in America. Everyone laughed at her over the top farewell and soon an awkward silence overtook the kitchen.

Alcide noticed the tense atmosphere and was eternally grateful when his cell phone began to ring. He sprinted to his room to take the call, thus leaving Eric and Sookie alone..again.

The two of them worked side by side, chopping up 'shrooms and peppers for the meat sauce, each caught up in their own thoughts.

Eric focused on simplfying his plan of seduction, it almost made him laugh, thinking about his high-school like approach to "wooing" her.

Sookie on the other hand, was in hell. Every second of his silence made her overthink every aspect of their friendship...relationship? If only she could read minds, that way she wouldn't feel so helpless. She desperately wanted him to tell her what was on his mind; what could he possibly be thinking about that would have him so distracted?

A million questions ran through her head. She was dying to know how he could joke with her like old friends at Ikea and then ignore her so easily now? What on earth possessed him to kiss her? She wasn't stupid and figured out pretty quick that the guys had planned to be very touchy-feely earlier to get under Bill's skin, but Eric had said that it wasn't an act. Was it possible that the most gorgeous man Sookie had ever laid eyes on enjoyed kissing her as much as she loved kissing him?

These thoughts kept circling around in her head, but she was far too embarrassed to actually ask Eric anything. At least they worked well together in the kitchen. Sookie boiled the pasta as Eric tended to the sauce; he set the table, she threw together a salad. The relief they felt as the rest of the roommates joined them to eat was short lived.

"Looks great guys!" Alcide enthusiastically started to fill up his plate before he even sat down. "Ha, so how was Bill after we left?" Sookie bit her lip and pleaded with her eyes for Eric to answer for her.

"Pissed that Sookie realized she could do so much better..." Eric shrugged at Sook, not sure if that answer was up to snuff.

"Fuckin' A, right?" Alcide's plate was practically overflowing, the man could eat. "Hope you're not too upset about what happened, Sookie."

Sookie tensed up and blushed, not sure what he could be talking about. Was kissing her part of their elaborate plan to fuck with Bill?

"Yeah," Claude jumped in after swallowing another bite of salad, "well at least _this way_ you and Alcide had some practice for Tray's wedding this weekend."

"Alcide?" Everyone stared at her like she was crazy. "OH, right, Alcide..because you were all, flirting?" Eric looked away and sipped from his bottle of water.

"Yeah, Bill looked like he wanted to murder me when he walked out and saw me holding you in the street! Imagine what he'd of done if I had Kissed You!"

"HAHA!" Even Sookie flinched at her horrible fake-laugh. "OH, that would have been crazy! Kissing, that's just, well that's just...silly." Sookie let out her breathe as she trailed off, praying for a change in topic.

"Sookie, is there a reason why you're only eating salad?" Alcide and Eric stopped eating to check Sookie's plate. Honestly she had just been too preoccupied with her thoughts on Eric to serve herself any spaghetti. Eric was frowning and Sookie's cheeks burned red in shame, her Gran would have had a CONNIPTION if she had seen how rude Sookie was being towards the chef!

"Sorry! I _wanted _some, but Alcide took twenty years filling up his plate!" Everyone laughed so Sookie relaxed. "I'm actually surprised there's any left."

"Sorry about that Sookie," Alcide added sheepishly. He grabbed her plate from in front of her and began to serve her some of Eric's signature dish. "Better serve ya' some now before I get around to eating Seconds!" She chuckled and thanked him with a nod as he set down the plate.

The first bite was orgasmic. What spices did he put into his sauce? She was sure that spaghetti was spaghetti and it couldn't be that different from her own, right? Wrong. Whatever she was eating was exploding with flavor. Sookie closed her eyes and moaned, savoring each moment with Eric's creation. If his _food_ was this good, she wondered what else he could do to bring her more _pleasure_.

"That's a relief," Claude joined in after sipping his wine, "you certainly don't _look_ like that kind of girl that would only eat a salad at dinner."

Sookie wasn't sure HOW to take that one. On the one hand, she was insulted, what else could he have meant? It was a total Dig on her Figure. So she had some meat on her bones! Sookie's eyes still narrowed at him, but she decided not to jump the gun and accuse him of common douche-baggery.

Sookie forked another mouthful of her delicious meal into her mouth, a hearty portion of noodles and meat, and Mewled exaggeratedly to show Claude just how much she enjoyed food, not just Vegetation during dinner. Eric groaned and her eyes snapped to his. His face seemed to express a slightly pained expression, but luckily none of the guys noticed. She slurped a lone noodle between her puckered lips childishly before the playful smack-talking with Claude began.

Eric had to look away. He focused on the kitchen's light fixture across the room, anything was better than listening to her moan and staring at Sookie's perfect mouth. _God that mouth_... he shivered remembering how fantastic her lips felt against his own.

"I love eating salad," Claude raised his eyebrows to her, almost as if asking 'Is that a fact?'. She nodded and continued, "actually, I've got an embarrassing story. Now I'm from a small town in Louisiana, and our dining options were few and far between, but one day, my brother's friend asked me to join him for a meal in the city an hour away from home! Of course I said yes, so there we were at this fancy restaurant and they asked if I wanted a Super Salad. That sounded great so I shouted "SURE!", so the waitress stared at me puzzled for a while before repeating soup OR salad. I'd never been more humiliated.

I went with the salad of course, and it was just a tiny dinky-thing. -So disappointing when I had my heart set on a Super Salad! Look at me, I'm a growing girl! So now I'm terrified to order a salad at restaurants. If they're just gonna be those _tiny_ portions, I might damn near Starve To Death!"

The guys all laughed and dinner seemed to fly by without a hitch. Sookie was having an amazing time. It turns out, getting the rest of her things from Bill's place felt like a huge weight had been lifted from her shoulders. She found herself incredibly grateful for her meddling roommates. Eric and Sookie relaxed enough to seem normal in front of the others, but still couldn't muster up the words to speak to one another.

When the meal ended (-er Alcide finished off the rest of the pasta) Sookie tried to help Eric clear away the dishes, but Claude whisked her away to dance near the living room. He twirled and dipped her romantically while Alcide clapped and cheered at their ballroom-like antics. As Claude pulled her close to him, he gave a theatrical snort and raised her arm high above her head to get a better whiff of Sookie.

"Good Lord, I KNEW you couldn't be the perfect woman, but I figured a lady of your caliber would at least take her hygiene seriously!"

Sookie was mortified. Sure, she hadn't had a chance to jump in the shower, but did he really have to call out her Funk like that in front of everyone? She could hear Alcide snicker behind them and couldn't bring herself to see Eric's reaction to Claude's remark, instead she slapped Claude's chest and laughed along with him.

"Well maybe if _some _people had given me a chance to bathe after working out this morning, my hygiene wouldn't be an issue! Instead y'all kidnapped me the minute I walked through that door!"

Claude spun her in the direction of the hall and slapped her ass. "Well no one is stopping you NOW sweetheart!"

Sookie stuck her tongue out at him and pulled her white tank top over her head as she walked past the dining room on her way to the shower. She was still wearing her black sports bra, a bra which covered more of her upper body than her bikini, but after seeing the slack-jawed look on Eric's face, she selfconsciously sprinted out of his sight towards the bathroom!

Eric busied himself with wiping down odds and ends in the kitchen...willing his erection away. He couldn't believe Sookie had whipped off her top right in front of him! Seeing her in just a black bra had him rock hard. Her nipples were hard underneath the silky looking fabric, and even the muscles of her stomach were a major turn on for him.

The other guys finally disappeared to their rooms since their main form of entertainment, Sookie, had started up the shower. Eric finally risked the walk to his room. Feeling much like a teenager, he scanned around the loft in search of an object (or possibly clothing) he could hold in front of himself to hide his boner. He had managed to calm down a bit since Sookie's mini-strip tease, but as he walked past the bathroom, the smell of her body wash and smooth sound of her voice singing in the shower caused his mind to wander. He internally fought himself from joining her under the warm water and somehow made it to his bedroom.

He took a seat on the small couch in front of his entertainment center and turned on his TV. Eric took a deep breath but couldn't focus on whatever was on, the only thing on his mind was the thought of Sookie naked with water rushing down those amazing curves.

He unzipped and began to stroke himself as he imagined her walking towards him, much like she did while wearing the tiny towel just days before. In his fantasy, she would drop to her knees and plead silently to take him in her mouth, he of course would offer no resistance, undoing his belt and easing his jeans to the floor.

He imagined her surprise at his impressive length and felt himself precum, dreaming of Sookie licking her lips hungrily at the sight of his raging hard on. She would crawl towards him and then tease him mercilessly with her soft pink tongue; still smiling innocently up at him. She'd offer him a quick wink before engulfing his member deep into her mouth, making throaty moans as she swallowed his cock as much she could manage. He groaned and smiled at her encouragingly. So she couldn't deep throat like a porn-star, practice makes perfect.

Sookie would then trail her fingertips up his chest to lightly trace his nipples as she continued to work his meat. His knees would shake and occasionally buckle due to her minstrations, but he'd manage to stay standing awaiting the amazing orgasm she was determined to suck right out of him.

He began to pump himself furiously as he envisioned how warm and wet her mouth would be.

((meanwhile)) Sookie couldn't help but over-think Eric's silence. Was he going to ignore her forever? It tore her up inside, fighting with him. They just got along so well, even the way they'd joke together felt natural, like they had known each other for years.

Nope, Sookie couldn't stand back and let him shut her out. They could talk things out like adults... That thought alone made her face palm herself. EARLIER, she had told Eric they could talk things out, but all she did was tell him what _She _thought they should do.

Honestly, she was afraid! It was too soon to jump into a relationship with anyone, and Eric just wasn't the relationship type of guy! Even if she gave in and he gave her one night of amazing sex (she was Positive the sex would be the best she'd ever have, c'mon! Look at the guy!), he'd probably never speak to her again. Based on how he reacted to them just _kissing_, anything more would make living together impossible.

Still, Sookie was ashamed of herself. Her profession was all about _listening_ and she honestly never gave Eric a chance to _speak_. She could have at least asked him to explain his actions! Nope, she just jumped the gun because she was nervous and still overwhelmed by his kiss. Never once did she consider he might have a different opinion or maybe another game plan for how to act around the rest of the roommates.

With that thought in mind, Sookie quickly brushed out her wet blonde hair, threw on an oversized t-shirt and a pink pair of panties with music notes across them, and tip-toe Sprinted down the hall and burst through Eric's door.

"Eric, I messed up earlier, all I did waaaa-!"

"SOOKIE, WHAT THE FUCK?"

-Sookie was shocked... Eric was to her left, leaned back in his mini-living room, pants around his ankle, dick in hand with thick gobs of cum over one hand while the other held his (ENORMOUS) member! His T shirt had been lifted up over his God-Like stomach and exposed one of his sexy nipples. There were streams of white up over his chest and lots actually managed to land on his shirt.

She was frozen, momentarily, why didn't she have the decency to knock? Gran would tan her hide if she-Nope. Sookie couldn't even complete the thought. She stood there practically hypnotized by Eric's cock, eyes bugging out of her skull.

When she finally trailed her eyes up Eric she felt the extreme heat of blood rushing to her face in embarassment. He was holding his breath and the look on his face was a mix of Anger, Confusion, Surprise, and he even seemed Nervous by the way his eyebrows furrowed.

She stood there for what felt like hours but was actually just a matter of seconds before she jumped back out of his room, slamming his bedroom door, and let out a Giggle/EEP sort of Yelp, or laugh?

What. The fuck?


	9. Chapter 9

**BAM! Bet you all figured It'd be a couple more weeks before an update, but here you go-Chapter 9! (I own nothing)**

Chapter 9

Sookie just stood outside of his door, too shocked to move. She just walked in on Eric during a _very_ private moment. Suddenly, kissing the guy didn't seem so bad! Moments passed and she remembered to breathe, but the sexy visual of Eric in his _entirety_ had been burned into her memory. Of course he must have felt embarrassed, but Sookie was incredibly turned on by the sight. Should she tell him that? Would that make things less awkward between them?

Movement in Eric's room made Sookie even more curious so she pressed her ear to the wood. There was a lot of grumbling, shuffling, slamming of another door. She began to nibble her lip. He was angry but she refused to chicken out and run away from this inevitable conversation. She waited for a few minutes outside until the sound of his movements stopped.

After Sookie's breathing evened out she hesitantly knocked on his door. Eric grumbled out a "come in" so she fumbled with the doorknob before covering her eyes and then entered the room. Blindly, she walked in, still knocking along the wall with every step.

"Sookie, you don't have to keep knocking once I say 'come in'." She let out the breath she had been holding and peeked through her fingers to make sure everything was normal and that Eric was decent. He was no longer wearing his shirt and Sookie blushed realizing he had probably used his tainted shirt to help clean the rest of himself off. She bit her lip as she searched for the perfect words to begin probably the most awkward conversation of her life. Eric wasn't exactly in the patient mood.

"What did you come here for, Sookie?"

"Oh, I just wanted to apologize for-"

"There is nothing to apologize for."

"Oh-hoho YES there is! I never should have walked in here without knocking! I mean, I didn't mean to see any of your-"

"SOOKIE, Stop. It's Fine."

"No, Eric! We should probably talk about this." He rubbed the bridge of his nose, wincing as though he had a headache.

"Sookie, there's nothing to talk about." Eric walked around her and slid open the entrance to his Batcave (closet), reached in and grabbed a black shirt and threw it on.

"Look, I know I saw your, _stuff_, and it was a total accident..." Eric tried to walk past her out of his bedroom but she stood in the doorway.

"Sookie, you're blocking the door." Sookie looked surprised that he was leaving so late in the evening but sheepishly stepped to the side.

"Oh. I didn't realize you were leaving. Do you have a date our something?"

Eric shrugged and sort of nodded his head. Of course he didn't have a date! Who plans a date for a Sunday night? No. Eric was embarrassed and pissed off at the current lack of control in his life. He planned to spend the night in Pam's spare bedroom, and he prayed she wouldn't ask too many questions as to why.

"I see, well tell 'that guy' to behave!" as she motioned awkwardly towards his penis. Eric ground his teeth in frustration.

"Sookie..." he warned.

"Eric, I'm so sorry," she blurted out, "Honestly. And I didn't mean to laugh-" Eric's fists were now balled in anger. All he had wanted was for her to drop it so they could move on. He couldn't even get out of the building since she seemed hell bent on humiliating him further. He snapped at her more than he should have.

"THEN WHY DID YOU LAUGH, SOOKIE? Was there something funny about my-"

"NO!" Eric squared his shoulders and narrowed his eyes at her. She began to blush, flustered to talk about his manhood out in the hallway for other roommates to possibly hear.

"Of course not, it's very _handsome_." He quirked an eyebrow. "Substantial..?" A corner of his mouth lifted in a half smirk. Sookie blushed but maintained eyecontact before confessing what she really thought about his member.

"It's a..." He crossed his arms in front of his chest waiting for her to continue. Her cheeks burned but she refused to back down, afflicted or not. "It's a Gracious...Plenty."

Eric shook his head and grinned. He had never really felt himself described in such a way, but he needed to cool his head and get Pam's expert advice on everything Sookie Stackhouse. Dear Abbey always provided a new perspective. Eric reached out and innocently ruffled her hair.

"I'll be back later." Sookie bit her lip and watched him walk towards the front door.

"Yeah, but I might not-" The door slammed before she could even finish her sentence. She huffed before the sound of chuckling behind her made her cringe and slowly turn around. Claude was leaning against his bedroom doorway, his shoulders shaking as he laughed to himself. He nodded his head for her to follow him into his room so she dragged her feet and went in after him.

"That was SO horrible." He shook his head at her and she groaned loudly and covered the top of her head with her hands.

"What am I gonna do? He's never gonna speak to me again! I'm so embarrassed!" Sookie jumped/sat back onto Claude's silky sheets and he sat cross legged on the wood floor in front of her, physically tucking his feet up into a yoga position.

"It's not a big deal. I've seen Eric's stuff like a _million _times." Sookie's eyes widened. Eric's shown his junk to Claude? Had she heard wrong about his preferences?

"You have? I mean...how?" Claude shrugged and pulled at the imaginary loose fibers of his sleep pants.

"Knew him in college. Gym locker rooms, swimming pools, penis fights. It just happens." Sookie's nose crinkled as she imagined what exactly a penis fight was. She took a moment and questioned whether she should tell Claude the whole story. As far as she knew, he might have only gathered she'd seen his equipment. He probably had no idea she had caught him right after..._completion_. She figured he didn't need to hear all the details, after all, his alliances are probably with Eric. She was just the new girl.

"I need your help." She pleaded to him with her eyes and Claude flashed her a closed-mouth smile.

"Alright. So what happened after you walked in?"

"I don't know. I kind of..laughed?"

"SOOKIE! You can't laugh at a naked man. ESPECIALLY Eric. Eric is delicate, like a flower. Now listen to me," Sookie nodded, "you're just going to act like this _never _happened."

"What? We live together, we're like a family. Families talk about things." Claude shook his head again.

"Nooo. Families _ignore_ things until they go away." Claude might have had a point. Every conversation with Gran for the past couple of _years_ had nothing to do with Bill, and now that he was history she suddenly had her _real _family back. She nibbled her lip, overthinking it, wondering why Gran (the strongest woman she knew) would choose to ignore the Bill situation altogether?

"He's probably going to stop talking to me." Sookie blinked back her frustrated tears and Claude shook his hand at her to knock off the crying.

"So did he say where he was going this late at night?" She frowned and shrugged.

"He said he had a date." Claude pushed back his silky bangs with a smirk. There was no way Eric had planned a date so far in advance, especially on a Sunday night. Nope. Whenever Eric picked up a woman it was always after randomly running into someone, followed by a quick witty conversation dripping with sexual innuendo, and then they'd do the deed. Every time, the Lucky Lady just happened to be in the right place at the right time.

Never in all their years living together had Claude seen Eric actually pick up the phone and specifically dial a woman's number. He studied Sookie closely and noticed she seemed _too_ concerned with Eric. Hmmm. Why else would she be _so _upset he had a "date"?

Whatever Eric was up to, there was no way he would be coming home tonight, and Sookie the sweetheart would only stay up all night for nothing. Claude stretched and decided he would help her out. He had never met a woman like Sookie, and if anyone were worthy enough of someone as wonderful as Eric, it'd be her. He reminded himself that Rome wasn't built in a day and figured she could use a bit of distracting before actually putting his plans for the two of them into motion.

"Sookie, would you like to get out of the house for a bit? Maybe we could go for a drive?" She smiled and bounced up and down on his mattress.

"Actually! I have NEWS! I got a _very_ surprising text during dinner, so now we have plans until the _wee_ hours of the morning! But yes, we will have to take a drive soon! Who's driving? ONE-TWO-THREE, NOT IT!" Claude had no idea what she had planned for them, but her enthusiasm for her surprise was infectious.

"Okay. Tell me more, Stackhouse!" 

Eric grumbled to himself, rubbing his palm against his right eyelid as he entered their apartment. The night before had only gotten worse after leaving Sookie behind in the hallway.

So he had lied when he implied he had a date, unfortunately his cousin Pam actually had a date scheduled for that night and Eric regretted crashing it the minute he walked in on the two lesbians rolling about on Pam's hard-wood floors.

The women disentangled themselves and redressed in their scraps of underwear right in front of him, and Eric resisted the urge to vomit after seeing so much of his dear cousin. They assured him that he didn't have to leave since they had been at it for hours and could use the break to talk about his Girl Troubles.

So there he sat, sipping wine from one of Pam's Star Wars collectables cups, sandwiched between two lesbians in lingerie as they repeatedly insulted his gender and tried to explain Sookie's behavior being irrational due to the "Female Condition".

After one uncomfortable night on Pam's poor excuse of a couch, he decided that in order to continue with his plan to make Sookie fall for him, he'd have to convince her to forget all about catching him with his pants down..and covered in fluids.

He threw his keys onto the side table near the front door and heard the distinct sound of a fork clanging against a plate. Eric found Sookie sitting at the kitchen counter/island wearing a tiny Betty Boop pajama ensemble. He flashed her a smile, wondering why her bedhead wasn't half as bad as it usually appeared after she woke up. In any case, she looked beautiful. As always.

The aroma of the coffee Sookie had just brewed cause goosebumps of Want to appear on his skin, but he decided a shower would have to be his first order of business; maybe even a nap since his horrific night at Pam's completely wore him out.

"Late night?" She was blushing and doing her best to maintain eye contact. She was nervous. "SLEEP OVER PAAARTYYY!" she cheered in a sing-songy voice. Since Eric wasn't sure how to begin the conversation he mumbled out something about needing to go to his room.

As he walked down the hall towards his room he heard her continue eating her breakfast. He didn't really see what she had made, but whatever it was smelled amazing.

Eric took a breath and smiled. Things weren't too bad back there so maybe convincing Sookie what's best for her wouldn't be all that complicated. He had come to grips that she was just awkward in general, last night certainly didn't help things, but she had made their relationship uncomfortable from the get go. Eric smirked to himself thinking about how interesting things had become since she came into his life.

-And then it all went to hell...

Eric was just about to step past Sookie's room and noticed the door was ajar. Automatically his eyes sought out the inside of her bedroom. He had wanted to see how things looked now that she had more of her own things. Which pictures did she use on the walls? Where did she position her desk?

Before he could search out any furniture, his eyes widened in shock seeing some tanned, blonde man, wearing only jeans and sprawled out comfortably on top of Sookie's sheets.

Anger. Rage. Confusion.

What the fuck? He was just _so sure_ Sookie wasn't that kind of girl! Not even a full day had passed and she had brought home another man?

Eric didn't even bother going into his room, he stomped back to the kitchen to give Sookie a piece of his mind!

She saw him coming from the corner of her eye and hurriedly swallowed her current sip of coffee.

"Well you certainly had a busy night!" He shouted as he towered over her.

"Yea," she smiled, "didn't get a WINK of sleep!"

Eric became furious! He had actually started to feel bad for his past one night stands because she was _such _an innocent school teacher, so quick to judge him, And now here she is! Smiling away, like she hadn't just fucked some other guy?

Sookie cocked her head to the side, trying to figure out Eric's deal. She summed it up to being embarrassed over the monster cock/happy ending she walked in on.

"So, um, I've got something from my classroom that made me think of you..!" She reached into her enormous purse that he didn't remember seeing there before. She reached in, shuffled around, and finally pulled out some stupid wand with feathers and beads glued onto it.

"What the fuck is that?"

"It's a feelings stick. Whoever's holding it can say Whatever they're feeling or thinking without being judged by anyone else.." She held it out to him and he scowled back and forth between her and the stick.

Really? Did she really think he was going to hold her stupid stick and Talk about his Feelings?

Part of him did want to rip that stick out of her hands and chew her ass out for denying their chemistry and suggesting they forget the kiss! He wanted to yell at her for pretending to be some sensitive teacher with her stupid little crafts to 'listen' to his feelings, when she was obviously just a hypocrite, one who obviously hadn't listened to a word he's said, probably ever! He wanted to tell that bitch to knock before entering a room!

No. He just didn't have the balls to tell her he was hurt. This was the first time he had ever been so strung up on someone and he couldn't believe he meant So Little to her if she'd hook up with someone else when all he could ever seem to think about was her.

Since he couldn't man up and begin to tell her all the things eating away at him, he grabbed the Feelings Stick, held it in front of her face and snapped it in two, dropping the pieces onto the counter and storming out of the apartment.

Sookie's shoulders slumped and she sighed. Well, that wasn't the first time someone had broken her feelings stick, luckily the travel sized feelings stick was still intact.

So the stick was probably a terrible idea since she wanted to have an "adult conversation" with Eric, the star of her fantasies.

She cursed herself and wondered why she had to make things so much worse than they already were? It must be him. Eric is the coolest man she had ever met! He's young, successful enough to run his own club, has women wanting him left and right, he's hilarious and cool, confident, kind of arrogant, but still sweet and thoughtful. He plays the guitar, or at least he _owns _a guitar. Even when he tried to explain how uncool he was, he was _still _ridiculously cool. Just being himself is enough to make her feel like a gawky teenager all over again.

Since it was too late for her to follow Claude's advice, it was time to ask Claudine what she should do next. Sookie vowed to do Whatever it'd take to make things right with Eric.

Sookie went to the sink to take care of her dirty dishes feeling thankful she didn't have to make breakfast for everyone else. Her Guest had arrived at almost 4 in the morning since last-second flights to the city are much cheaper if you have no problems departing at ungodly hours.

Claude hadn't left her side since the hallway debacle and even went with her pick up Sookie's Surprise at the airport. He said there was no way in hell he would miss "such a touching reunion".

At first she had been hesitant about their meeting, praying he wouldn't be the overbearing protective asshole she had come to love, but he was nothing but charming and seemed to be on his best behavior. Actually, He and Claude got on like a house on fire!

Many a beer was shared and while the party was in the living room, Sookie always kept one eye on the door waiting for Eric. Alcide came out dressed for work at about 5am, introductions were made and Sookie's heart soared seeing that everyone could get along. It seemed as though every day she was discovering another thing her life would be missing if she had stayed with Bill.

After the gang had made plans to get together again that night, and Alcide had left for work, the other boys headed off to bed. Claude had to be up at noon for an important shoot, anyway.

As much as she hated leaving him all by himself in the apartment, she really did need to talk to Claudine. She took a quick shower, dressed in a jean skirt and a 3/4 sleeved deep blue athletic Jersey that reads "Sportsmanship is for Losers", and slipped on a pair of navy blue flip-flops. She quickly wrote out a note for the half naked man on her bed letting him know where she had disappeared to and even left him her key to the place before threading her fingertips lightly through his blonde hair, careful not to wake him. It had gotten a bit longer than he used to keep it, but she smiled to herself thinking it looked nice on him. She checked her watch and figured it was time to head out. She lovingly kissed the top of his head and sent a quick txt to Claudine to see which studio they were going to meet at. 

"So let me get this straight, you barged into his room and saw the guy naked?"

"Yes! And now he's acting totally weird, avoiding me, and he's never going to talk to me again! It's terrible, Claudine! I'm so sorry, it's just that I'd hate to have to move out..." She held up her hand to shut Sookie up.

"Ugh, you made that noise you make, didn't you?"

"What noise? I don't make a noise.." Sookie shifted around uncomfortably as Claudine was being worked over with a series of brushes and powders.

"Yea, you do. That noise giggle you make when you're uncomfortable?" Sookie blushed and looked away. Claudine smirked knowing she was right.

"Sookie, it's fine. You're worrying too much. Guys are easy, you've just gotta even the score. You've seen HIM, now let him see You."

Sookie gulped. She _did _vow to do whatever it'd take... 

Pam had FINALLY ditched her annoying booty-call, Elaine, and Eric actually got a couple hours of sleep. Like the loving cousin she was, Pam made him a cup of coffee and asked how badly things had gone with Sookie.

"What do you mean?" He sipped his coffee and stared at his hands.

"Don't play dumb, cousin. You couldn't _wait _to get out of here and fix things with her, only to come back with your tail tucked between your legs!" He scoffed.

"_Nooo_, I couldn't wait to get out of here to avoid your DATE and her terrible Dr. Phil advice..."

"Tell me what happened." Pam was completely serious. Eric had never once asked her for advice on women before, not because he Knew women, only because he didn't really give a fuck about their issues. She found herself disappointed Eric had come back so soon instead of whisking the gorgeous She-Nerd off into the sunset! So she was cynical and cold on the outside, deep down she was nothing but a hopeless romantic, though she'd never admit to it in a million years...

Eric studied his cousin for a moment before hunching forward over her dining room table. His large hand swept through his blonde hair before he gave in and told her about his current predicament.

"I went home to clear the air. There was another man in her bed."

Pam was shocked. That was the last thing she had expected to hear. Sure, she didn't know Sookie very well, but she seemed too wholesome to bring home a stranger.

"Well, she deserves it." Eric looked even more confused.

"Huh?"

"Eric, the girl just got out of a long-term relationship with an asshole who didn't deserve her. She owes it to herself and her bruised ego to just fuck a stranger senseless."

"Thanks Pam, that was real helpful."

"Well, it _could _be a good thing," he eyed her, waiting for her to continue. "It could be that you mean too much to her for her to simply use you for sex. The price would be too high if you two were to ruin your friendship over her getting buck-wild only to validate she is still an attractive woman." Eric cringed thinking about Sookie being "buck-wild" with anyone but himself. He shook it off, Sookie was probably a gentle lover anyway, nothing about her seemed like she was capable of getting freaky in the bedroom.

"I'm still not impressed, though. Even if that _was _her reasoning behind the fuck, she doesn't respect you enough if she had to do it under Your roof! Why didn't she think to do it at HIS place instead of letting you catch them in bed together?"

"Well, they weren't together when I saw him." Pam raised an eyebrow. "But he was almost naked on her bed."

"Was he atop the sheets or under her covers?" He was starting to see where she was going with this. -And no, he wasn't under the covers.

"I don't know, FUCK! What does it matter, Pam?" She smiled evilly.

"You're right. It doesn't." Eric wasn't expecting that. "So, what's the plan now, stud?" Eric buried his head in his hands.

"Go with the original plan? Treat her like one of the guys in public, shouldn't be too hard."

"And when you aren't in public?"

"Avoid her at all costs." 

Eric spent most of his day hiding out at Pam's and found himself wishing he had a reason to go into work that night.

It was getting dark out and Eric decided to pick up some grub from a nearby deli since he didn't feel like crashing a dinner with the roommates that Sookie had probably prepared. He kicked a rock out of his path, pissed off that Sookie was such an amazing cook.

As he was about to pay for his sandwich, a hand clapped over his own, brushing aside his debit card. Eric was surprised to see the face of...Christ, what was her name again? She had worked for him once as a dancer at The Valkyrie. She was probably older than him but wrote enough makeup to hide it well. She was short, thin, wiry black hair with an extremely white face.

He tried to remember her name but could only remember firing her because of all the customer complaints. Men claimed she was too aggressive and then would start shit with their wives, girlfriend, etc. Eric had no desire to deal with her bullshit and let her go. If only it were that easy to get rid of Sookie Stackhouse.

The woman pulled out a wad of money tucked between her breasts and winked. Normally the move would seem tacky and Eric would back away from the stench of her desperation, but he stood there mentally comparing her chest to Sookie's while the woman paid for his meal. Finally, he remembered his manners and tried to thank her.

"Thank you...uh?"

"Thalia..."

"That's right. It's been a while since you've worked at the club, how've you been?" She smiled a little _too _sweetly.

"Life's been good. How are things at Valkyrie?" He took a bite of his grinder, honestly hoping it would make this conversation end faster.

"Club's still a success. Pam's trying to convince me it's time for a second location." Eric was taking large bites as they walked down the street.

"Ya know, Eric, there are quite a few _rumors _going around about you and I." He swallowed his bite and grinned. He was no stranger to women flirting with him, and he had heard most of the rumors she was talking about. "Yep, they _say _you and I fucked in your office and since our _passion _was too distracting during normal business hours, I was canned so you would still seem..." she licked her lips sensuously, "_Professional_."

Eric tossed the empty sandwich wrapper into a nearby dumpster. He knew what she was after (she wasn't being very subtle about it either) and figured he might as well. It's not as though Sookie was interested in him anyway.

"Oh, is _that _what they say?" She laughed harder than necessary and punched his shoulder.

"It's too bad I had to do the time but didn't get to enjoy the crime.." Eric bit back the urge to correct her, luckily his phone went off and distracted him. Alcide.

"Hey Eric, you coming home anytime soon?" He couldn't be sure, but Alc definitely sounded inebriated.

"Yea, headed home now." He winked at Thalia and she giggled, flirtatiously twirling her hair. "Why?"

"Ohh, Sookie made the most out of this world meatloaf! We're all fighting over the last of it, but Sook made it up into a plate for you in case you were hungry when you got home."

Eric wasn't sure how to feel. He wanted to put his feelings behind him, but it was still sweet if her to think about him.

"Have at it, man. I've already eaten. Be home in a few." Thalia waited until his phone was tucked back into his pocket before asking.

"Didn't know the boss had to _Check In_." She wound her arm through his and stared up into his eyes as they continued to walk.

"Roommate. Just makin' sure I've already eaten, but I'm thinking of taking _dessert _to my room." He winked and that was all the encouragement she needed. Thalia hailed a taxi.

As they entered the building, the doormen and guys at the security counter greeted Eric a bit more friendly than usual. Thalia looked impressed but Eric caught a glimpse of Sookie's fancy picnic basket and the guys were all munching on homemade cookies and other pastries. He scowled at how fake Sookie was, baking goods to feel less whorish for bringing a man home last night.

The entire elevator ride was spent feeling each other up, Eric squeezing her ass, wishing it were more like Sookie's. Now _there _was an ass worth grabbing. They entered the apartment and were met with crazy drunken cheers from the living room. Thalia tried to smooth out her hair to seem more presentable.

"Hey Eric, glad you could make it!" Alcide jumped up and started dragging him into the living room, completely ignoring Eric's guest. "Come on, come on, there's somebody you gotta meet!"

Sitting on the sectional next to Claude with a beer in his hand was the same blonde haired man from before. He jumped up as soon as his eyes landed on Eric-nothing but smiles.

Fuck. Eric definitely didn't want to meet the man who fucked his girl. The fact that he was still there, _schmoozing _with her roommates proved he was going to be more than a one night thing for Sookie. To keep from scowling he turned back to Thalia.

"Why don't you wait for me in my room, I'll be there in a minute. Last door, end of the hall."

"Um, actually, Eric, where's the bathroom?" He gave her a reassuring smile.

"Second door on the left." She smiled and made her way down the hall. Eric was just thankful she wasn't acting pissy for not being introduced to the guys. She knew what this was.

Smiles walked over to him, holding his hand out to shake.

"Hey man, you must be Eric! Heard a lot about you!" Eric reluctantly shook his hand but still put in the effort to crush and intimidate the other guy. He was short, probably a bit taller than Sookie, but judging by his handshake, he was still pretty strong.

Eric wanted nothing more than to disappear to his room and have meaningless sex instead of standing there with the man Sookie would _rather _be with.

"Name's Jason. Listen, I just wanted to thank you for all you've done and thank you for taking care of my baby sister." 

...Sister? 

Eric's eyes widened as he realized _this _was Sookie's brother, not her spare booty call. Fuck, if he had taken the time he could have easily seen the resemblance between the two!

So Sookie wasn't the heartless bitch he had her pegged as. His heart clenched thinking that there might still be a chance for them yet! Eric stared down at the hand he was shaking. This was Sookie's family and he knew how important her family was to her. Eric dragged the man forward into a _very_ intimate hug, surprising him to say the least.

"Wow, ya'll must be _real _friendly in Sweden!" Eric practically threw him out of his arms when it dawned on him he may have gone a bit overboard with the meet and greet. Eric rubbed the back of his head, embarrassed, as his eyes searched the room for Sookie. She wasn't there.

"Where _Is _Sookie?"

"Oh, think she said she had something to show you-" Claude cut Jason off.

"She's waiting for you in your room." 

Fuck. 

Eric took off running towards the hall. He had forgotten all about Thalia! If he was going to have _any _chance with Sookie, he had to get Thalia out of the apartment before Sookie could see her.

Almost as if in slow motion, he saw it all go to shit. Thalia came out of the bathroom and took the two steps over to his bedroom door and reached for the doorknob. He called out her name, but it was too late. She pushed open the door and there was Sookie-

Completely Naked.

Eric had stopped running, he just stood there with his mouth hanging open starring at Sookie's perfect body on display as Thalia Shrieked in surprise.

Sookie bent down to grab THE tiny towel as she scrambled to cover herself and maneuver past Thalia. As soon as towel-clad Sookie was in the hallway, she pushed some of the hair out of her face, turned to the woman she had never seen before in her life and cordially introduced herself.

"HI. I'm Sookie. Welcome to our home." With that, she stepped into Claude's bedroom and slammed the door.

"Who the _fuck _was that?" Thalia hissed. 

**Mwahahaha, tune in for the next chapter where You get to hang out with Jason Stackhouse! **.


	10. Chapter 10

**Alright! So now that everyone's good and disappointed in Eric, let's see how he bounces back. This chap. actually has a lot of crazy fun, Jason Stackhouse is always good for a laugh!**

**Ch. 10**

* * *

><p>Well. The damage was already done.<p>

Eric was beyond confused. Why would Sookie be waiting for him Naked in his bedroom? Peace offering? Surely she wasn't there for Sex since her brother was just a few rooms down, right? Fuck! What if that was Exactly what she was there for?

Thalia. If there was anything Eric ever regretted in his life, it was everything Thalia! He risked taking a look at her and from the Scowl she wore, she was just about ready to slap him. Good. He deserved it and he knew it.

He wasn't exactly sure how to unfuck his current situation, but the first order of business was to remove Thalia from their home.

Eric was no stranger to kicking out women; he brushed past Thalia with absolutely no expression on his face, walking towards the front door. Yes. This strategy meant there would be witnesses to what was about to go down, but everyone had already seen Thalia walk in. Making a good first impression on Sookie's only brother was no longer a possibility, and since he had nothing to lose Eric decided to play the role of Asshole (acting wasn't really necessary, he had never felt so disappointed in himself as he did at that exact moment).

As he walked away from her she stormed right after him, her heels clacking against the floor as she stomped.

"Who the _fuck _was that Naked girl in your ROOM Eric?"

He cringed. Everyone had heard her, including Sookie's older brother. (Fuck. Fuck. Fuck.) The only thing Eric wanted was to somehow make her leave, and so the words left his mouth before he had time to process any repercussions.

"She's my wife."

Thalia gasped and covered her mouth with her well manicured hand.

"I think you should leave." He opened the door for her and stood back, mentally preparing for her to attack him. Oddly enough, she seemed more surprised and ashamed than enraged. Maybe it was the audience of men watching her from the living room?

It took a moment for her to sort out her emotions, but when she came to her senses, the tiny woman barreled past him, hissing out a "Bastard!" before Eric could lock the door behind her. He turned around slowly, not too thrilled to see Jason's reaction to the two minutes worth of Crazy/Drama he had invited into the apartment.

Shockingly, Jason Stackhouse was laughing as he sipped his beer. Eric could only come to one conclusion: The Guy Must Be Drunk.

"WhooooWee!" Jason cheered and set down his beer to clap. Eric froze, preparing himself for the worst. Claude seemed disinterested while Alcide glared at him, frowning disapprovingly.

"Sookie SAID you were an entertaining Sumbitch!" Jason started laughing so hard he had to hold his sides. "Ha, looks like you and me are gonna get along _Just Fine_!"

What. The. Fuck?

"Oh yeah, brother!" Jason walked over and slung an arm up over Eric's shoulder, leading him towards the couch, "Sookie used to give me _So _much shit over my Tom-Cattin' ways, but she always had some crazy backup plan to bail me out whenever the shit hit the fan! Haha, that naked scheme, 'that her idea or yours?"

"That was _all _her..." Eric held his hands up as though he had nothing to do with it, because honestly, he had nothing to do with it. Jason just laughed and motioned for Claude to hand Eric a beer from the small ice chest they prepared earlier.

"Silly bitch! One time, the father of one girl I was..._Seeing_, caught me on a date with another gal at this Diner Sookie was serving at. This guy was _just _about to kick my ass and then Sooks stepped in, convinced him I was her AA sponsor, just checkin' in on her to make sure she was coping OK serving alcohol to people and all. THEN she somehow got my date to go along with it! Yeah, Sook had her pretendin' to be a "youth pastor"! Fuck, I don't know how she does it, but she had that man shaking my hand and apologizing, EVEN THOUGH I HAD A BEER SITTIN' RIGHT IN FRONT 'A ME!"

Eric laughed softly and took a swig of his beer. He couldn't help but feel guilty. Jason had these crazy ideas that he and Sookie orchestrated this stuff in advance when really Eric had never felt more confused in his entire life. The fact that every time he blinked he would visualize Sookie completely naked didn't inspire much intelligent thought either. Claude nudged Eric with his foot.

"Hey, shouldn't you go check on your accomplice?" Eric shot up out of his seat and headed down the hall. Jason didn't skip a beat and continued on telling Claude and Alcide more legends of Sookie Freakin' Stackhouse (what they called her in High School).

Since Sookie hadn't emerged from Claude's room, Eric assumed she was still fairly naked. As he suspected, there was an outfit in her locker (in the bathroom) he hadn't seen her wear yet. He grabbed her clothes and hesitantly knocked on Claude's bedroom door.

That was another thing that bothered him. Why would Sookie run to Claude's room? He tried to talk himself out of feeling jealous of a homosexual stripper, but part of his brain kept nagging at him that if there was ever a woman who could turn Claude straight, it'd be Sookie "Freakin" Stackhouse. He had found it hilarious _before _when Claude had kissed her at the restaurant, mostly because of the shocked expression on her face, now Eric was nothing but suspicious of Claude's motives.

Sookie whipped open the door with a Panic-stricken face which contorted into confusion seeing _Eric_ standing there. He held up her clothes and she stepped aside to let him into the room, one arm across her chest holding the towel in place.

"Eric?" she questioned as she closed the door behind him. "What happened with your date?" Eric handed her the outfit.

"She went home."

"Oh, Eric, I'm so sorr-!"

"No. Don't." She seemed hesitant and bit her bottom lip. "Honestly."

"Oh. Was she your date from last night?" So much had happened that Eric had to stop and think about what he actually did the night before. Sookie misinterpreted his pause.

"OH GOD, that's not..even..any of my business!" she trailed off.

"No, it is. And no, we never even had a date. Last night I actually slept on Pam's couch. I. I just had a lot on my mind and needed to clear my head." Sookie gave him a cute lopsided smile as she took the clothes from his hand and backed a few feet away. She motioned for him to turn around so she could dress and Eric felt a sense of de ja vu. Unfortunately, all of the mirrors in the room weren't positioned well enough for him to catch another glimpse of Sookie naked. Yes, he had just seen All of her, but God, once just couldn't be enough.

"Sookie, I don't even know how to begin to apologize to you. Just, this morning, I thought I saw something, and I got angry, and I'm sorry I broke your little stick thing. It's all so stupid because, as it turns out, I didn't really even see anything-"

"Eric, don't worry about what you thought you saw." He could hear the rustling of her clothes behind him. Sookie was blushing furiously thinking Eric was talking about "seeing" her naked.

"I just-I have no excuse for what I did." Eric shamefully hung his head wondering what possessed him to even _Consider _fucking Thalia. Hell, he couldn't even remember her name at first! He spent the entire time comparing her to Sookie anyway.

Sookie finished dressing and couldn't help but feel sorry for the guy. She figured she'd have felt pretty ashamed getting caught masturbating by a practical stranger too. Ten seconds of standing naked for him seemed like nothing in comparison. Sookie tiptoed over to him and placed her warm hand in the center of his back.

"Hey, there's nothing to worry about. We're even now."

Eric shook his head. They were Pretty Fucking Far from even. He had immediately assumed the worst of her when she wasn't even sleeping with Anyone! Pam was right. Sookie's absolutely Perfect. She's a beautiful, funny, and smart woman who dealt with the same fucking asshat for YEARS. She DESERVED to get laid. _He _was the one who needed to prove something to Her.

His chest felt as though it was caving in as he realized nothing he's done in his entire life (up to that moment) made him even _close _to being worthy of her. Sookie deserved someone just as Amazing as herself. He wasn't sure how to go about it, especially after ruining everything by bringing some slut into the equation, but at that very moment, Eric vowed to do whatever it'd take to make Sookie happy.

"I want you to, just...Sookie," he turned around to look at her. God, she was beautiful. Her blonde hair was down and floating around her head from the static of pulling on a new shirt. She had on a cute jean skirt that wasn't terribly short and a dark-blue long sleeved shirt. He was about to read the clever saying printed on it but noticed her nipples beneath the fabric. She wasn't wearing a bra! Why wasn't she wearing a bra with her brother visiting? He tried not to dwell on it.

Eric immediately focused back on her eyes. He had already seen Sookie naked, no sense in getting carried away envisioning himself massaging those heavy breasts, too.

Sookie didn't exactly know he was "checking her out" since she was pretty oblivious to those sorts of attentions, but she knew Eric was looking at her more closely than usual. She selfconsciously pushed her thick black frames up the bridge of her nose and smiled just from seeing Eric smile at her.

So conditions weren't _perfect_, but the air was **Definitely **Clearer between them. Maybe Claudine knew what she was talking about after all. Sookie made a mental note to follow her advice more often.

"Sookie..I want you to know, I Never slept with her." Now Sookie was confused, her eyebrows furrowed and Eric began to ramble on. "I promise, I just ran into her today, just a few minutes ago. She's not someone...you don't have to worry about seeing her again, ok?" Sookie put her hand up on his shoulder to chill him out.

"Whoa, hey, Eric! It's fine. Who you're interested in isn't really any of my business! You're a grown man, you don't have to answer to anybody."

Sookie did an excellent job of reigning in the small pang of jealously. That woman really was beautiful, very glamorous; just the kind of lady she could imagine Eric dating. The only thing she couldn't understand was Eric's _current _strange behavior. One second he was mad she didn't take his kisses seriously, then he tried to pretend she didn't exist, now he apologizes for HER ruining HIS Date, it was madness! She had been so sure they were making progress after she had _Bared It All_...and then suddenly it hit her!

She thought she had him all figured out-

"Eric," she started soothingly, "It's ok. Well, _sure _it's a little embarrassing, but I'm starting to get Used to strange women seeing me naked!" She started to laugh at her own joke as Eric was wracked with guilt. How could he forget the fallout with Bill? He frustratingly ran his hand through his hair and Sookie stood on her toes to catch his arm and stop him. "Really, you should invite Pam over more often, maybe she'll luck out and steal a peek like everyone else!" She giggled and winked and Eric faked a smile while his heart crumbled within him.

There was no denying it. Eric felt like the biggest douche in the world, and every time he opened his mouth to let her know how remorseful he was for ruining their chance at greatness, she'd just smile, _cool as a cucumber_, and tell him everything was just _peachy_! He knew they'd just keep going in circles if he told her again how Thalia was a mistake, so he tried to change the subject.

"So, I just met your brother. He seems pretty friendly." Sookie chuckled and took a step back, taking her hand away from his warm body.

"Well that's _one _way to describe him! I didn't even find out he was coming for a visit until he was departing from Louisiana last night! Gran says he jumped on a plane the minute he found out Bill and I finally split for good."

"Yeah, he thinks we're in cahoots."

"Why's that?" Eric sheepishly tucked his hands into his pockets before answering her.

"When I was kicking out Thalia earlier, at the door, she started shouting loud enough for everyone to hear. She asked who you were..." he hesitated meeting her eyes, "I told her you were my wife."

Eric swore she was going to start screaming at him, maybe lecture him about lying to women and hurting their feelings, but Sookie covered her mouth and giggled.

"Well that explains it! I swear, I've had to help talk that guy out of situations since he was Thirteen! He probably figured out I flashed you, eh?" Eric nodded uncomfortably.

"Sookie, I've gotta ask, why'd you run in here? Why didn't you run to, you know, _Your _room?"

"Well. Jas is staying in my room and I wasn't _about _to have him walk in on me naked! Then he'd start bringing up more embarrassing stories like Skinny Dipping in Sheriff Dearborn's pond when I was sixteen." Sookie mentioned it so casually but Eric was dying to know more. He'd have to ask for the full story later since they needed to get back to the rest of the gang before Jason kicked his ass for fooling around with his Naked little sister.

"So did Claude know you were going to wait naked...in my bedroom?"

"No. Oh, well, _maybe_? I did tell him I was going to 'Even the Score'. He's been really great since last night. Eric...listen, I don't like it when things are _off _between us. What I walked in on, I mean, I _Understand_ why you left. Just- Can we? Do you think we can just have a Do-Over?"

"A do-over?"

"Yes. Eric, It's-_I've _been Ten Kinds of crazy lately. It's probably just all this Bill drama, _Years _of emotional stuff I really need to deal with, but I haven't really felt like myself! I've been so spastic and I swear, I haven't felt this lame since high school!" She laughed and pushed up her glasses. "But I think you and me? We're good together."

Eric felt an unfamiliar tightness in his chest at her words. He tried not to hope for too much knowing he was reading too much into what she was saying, but he would take whatever she was willing to give.

"I get what you're saying. I've been feeling out of sorts lately, too."

"See, so now we're Square! We're just going to put all the weird behind us! Everything. Starting fresh, because you're hilarious and I miss joking around, and, ya' know... hanging out with you." She blushed. "So now that you've _seen me _and I've _seen you _(she blushed harder than ever) we should be fine!" She paused to breathe and actually started to look relieved. "So-we should probably get back out there.."

"Hey, there she is! As I was saying, Sookie has this way with words. One year, before she started waiting tables at Merlotte's, Sook wrote out these speech assignments for classmates in exchange for cash. Christmas was right around the corner and Sookie really wanted to buy Hunter that fancy new Playstation 2, hah, anyway! I remember her persuasive speech, she had everyone believing the world was flat! Or remember the speech you wrote for Lafayette? Where you convinced everyone dinosaurs never really existed? You even dumbed down Hoyt's speech enough to where it looked like he did the work himself, _Still _tricked people into thinking Gold Fish crackers were actually cat food!"

Sookie laughed along at Jason's stories as she opened up a bottle of beer and set up another one for her darling brother. The beer he was working on was just about finished.

"Jas, I don't know _how _you remember all that stuff!"

"Pfft, how could you _Forget_? You banked over $200 in _one _week and all the kids were bragging about how every speech ya' wrote got an A!"

Sookie shook her head, chuckling as she made herself comfy against the wall across from the boys on the sectional. Eric couldn't seem to tear his eyes away from her. It was fun hearing about teenage Sookie, in fact, he wanted to know _everything _about Sookie.

"So Eric, these guys tell me you and I may just be Soulmates!" Eric choked and sputtered out beer.

"Come again?" Jason laughed and slapped him on the back.

"I'm a bit of a Ladies Man, myself." Sookie scoffed in her corner.

"Jason, you can't really dress up the term _slut_. Guys, this man gets around like a Record. I'd warn you to keep an eye on your sisters, but I suppose it's too late for that, _right Claude_!"

"My sister and I share similar tastes. Your brother comes highly recommended." Jason sat up a little straighter to look down on Sookie with a smug, satisfied smile. Well, at least he could take Claude's advances in stride. Back home, Lafayette sure did a good job desensitizing her once somewhat-homophobic brother.

"Maybe Claudine's memory is foggy. She couldn't even Walk out of that bar, she was so plastered!"

"What are you talking about, sis? I Happened to _carry _her because it was chivalrous and romantic!" Jason could barely keep a straight face and the way her eyes narrowed at him was more playful than pointed.

It was obvious to the rest of the roommates that the Stackhouse siblings were once quite close and must have missed this strange relaxed taunting of one another.

"Alright, now we've got all the roommates here, the game shall continue!"

Eric looked around confused but eventually found the deck of playing cards scattered across the coffee table. Jason pointed to his younger sister. "Sook, you should probably break out the hard stuff."

"Aw, we've been so loose with the rules already, do we really hav-"

"Well of _course _we do!"

Everyone smiled at the way they seemed to read one another's mind.

"Since Eric's new, I'll explain what's goin' down." Sookie begrudgingly followed her brother's orders and retreated to the kitchen to grab the fancy bottle of rum she had found stashed in cabinet the other day.

"So, we've just been playin' a lil drinkin' game to get to know one another. I've gotta make sure I know the men in my baby sister's life after all!"

"Jason..." Sookie growled at him from the kitchen. Jason shifted forward to whisper to the guys.

"Doesn't really matter. Honestly, _anyone _is better than Boring as Balls, Bill Compton." The guys all grunted out in agreement as Sookie came back into the room with the booze. She eyed everyone suspiciously as she kneeled across from her brother at the coffee table.

"What are y'all whispering about?" Jason shrugged innocently as he shuffled the deck of playing cards.

"I was apologizing to your friend _Eric _on your behalf. Just because he was blessed with the same God-Given abilities of pickin' up women as _I _do doesn't mean you get to harp on this poor boy and call him names like _slut_."

"Oh, I didn't rope him in with the likes of _You_! Eric here has _Standards_, you, Jason Stackhouse, You are the reason Gran can't miss a single Sunday of Church!"

"Hey, I have standards!" Sookie raised her eyebrows in challenge.

"Maudette Pickens?" Jason rubbed the back of his head guiltily. After losing that argument he turned his attention back to the game.

"As I was saying, Eric, we've just been playin' a friendly Drinking Game That Has No Name! Alcide here is probably going to profit the most out of the experience! You'll know so much about Sookie, you kids will be able to pull off a fake relationship for that Weddin' in your sleep!"

Eric scowled, something that didn't go unnoticed by Jason Stackhouse.

"Well it goes as such, we each draw a card, and at the same time, we reveal our card to the other players by slapping it to our foreheads! Person with the _lowest _value card drinks from their drink and shares an embarrassing story or fond memory of their past.

Now that's all simple enough, but there are loopholes and exceptions that _Really _make the game fun! IF, a person draws the lowest card **three **times in a row, they have to take a shot of this here Captain Morgan to "exercise their demons" and they _still _have to share with the class. They take a shot from then-on-out until their luck changes and someone _else _draws a shit card.

Now sometimes it's hard to think of anything good from your past, this is where you can elect to "Throw 'em Under the Bus". You drink some beer, as does the player that you have an embarrassing story of. Game Commissioner, who we've decided shall be _Claude _for the evening (Claude bowed), decides with a thumbs up or down whether the person thrown under the bus is to take a shot or not, based on the story. I plan to throw Sook under the bus every card I get! You still with me so far?" Eric nodded.

"The final rule is the "1up Rule". After the story has been told, and you have a Better story, which is related to the one you just heard, you can tell yours. If you manage to one up the other story, the original story teller takes a shot! If your story falls short You take the shot.

Now let's get started, you learn the ropes as you play!"

Everyone drew a card and after a second slapped it to their heads. Fingers were pointed but Sookie lost with a 3 of hearts. She sipped a decent amount if her beer as she thought about what to share with everyone.

"Once upon a time, I was taking a course at LSU, they had us do this quick project where we wrote down the top 5 things we look for in the opposite sex," Eric almost wished he could take notes.

"So after we finished our lists, we were split into groups of the Same sex to decide _as a group _what would be the top 5 things wanted in the opposite sex.

The MINUTE we sat down, this cunt beside me jumps in with "Number 1 will be Financial Security, because _that _is the **Most **important thing!" No, "Hi, how are ya?" just- **Financial Security**. Bam!

Well, the rest of the girls were silent, so "I" coughed out a *cough***GOLD DIGGER***cough*!

So now this bitch was _Furious _with me, so she RIPS my paper from my hands and says "Yea? Well let's see what YOU wrote!" So before I can stop her, she reads out my number one answer..."

Eric was on the edge of his seat.

"Protects me from BEES?" Everyone laughed and Sook took another sip of beer to take the edge off.

They had sort of been playing the game for a while now, and it was pretty entertaining, but now that _Eric _was participating her heart was racing. She crossed her fingers hoping he wouldn't tell the group any stories about her terrible kissing skills or her bikini wax he had recently seen!

"Well I sure as shit can't 1up _that _one, draw again!" Everyone drew new cards and Sookie lost again.

"Alright, this time I choose to throw my _darling _brother under the bus!" Claude prepared a shot of spiced rum and Jason held his hands up, wiggling his fingers as if to say 'bring it on'.

"When Jas and I were in middle school, our neighbors across the cemetery, the lovely _Compton's_, purchased a CHIHUAHUA dog as a pet. Anyway, this stupid ass dog was named Chico -_the racists_.

So Chico was the most annoying little shit! He would come to Gran's property, pee on her tires, yap like crazy at my cat, Tina, and worst of all, take a chihuahua dump right at the front door! It'd get stuck on the screen door and everything!

So one afternoon, Jason and I were pretending to be ninjas in the front yard with ninja stars and our new blow-gun. Well, Chico started walking around our yard like he _owned _the place, so Jas took out the _real _dart from the blowgun and put in a stun dart. The stun darts are plastic outside but have a small metal BB inside, so if you get shot with it, it'll leave a mean welt.

So right as Chico raises a leg to pee on Gran's front tire, Jay closes one eye, takes aim at Bill's dog's stomach, takes a deep breathe and shoots! It starts flying towards the dog, but he's a good distance away so the dart starts to lose altitude! **PAP**! Right in the Dick! Jason shot him right in the Chihuahua penis!"

Even Sookie was laughing at her own story! Jason drank his shot and slammed the small glass on the coffee table.

"Ya'll should be takin' shots in my honor! Chihuahua dick-shots are IMPRESSIVE! Do you know how small a target that was?"

After the laughter died down they revealed their cards again. Sookie lost for the third time in a row.

"Ahgk! Are you kidding me?" She didn't even wait for someone to pour her a shot, she took a swig straight from the bottle, wincing and shivering as it went down.

Eric tried to look away after realizing he had been staring at her the entire night. He was glad Sookie kept drawing the worst cards, at least it gave him the chance to hear more about her and where she grew up.

"Alright, do a YOU story, sis! No more throwin' me under the bus! Besides, don't you guys wanna hear more stories about Sookie?"

"YES!" Sookie smiled at their collective 'yes', it was even cuter than seeing her students shout an answer at the same time. She washed away the taste of rum with her beer thinking of a fun story.

"Our high school used to host a Career Day, so my best friend Tara and I crashed the class about Massage Therapy. We goofed off most of the time but the MT was impressed with our work, or something? So we were picked to spend a day job shadowing a real massage therapist. Of course we said yes because we'd get out of an entire day of school!

So there we were, about 5 er 6 of us girls at some _weird _hippie retreat to massage and get massaged. First off, the masseuse we met was honest to God, CRAZY. She was wearing a LABCOAT, her kinky red hair was All Over the place, her lipstick was smeared, honestly, it looked like she was hopped up on Pet-meds.

So the crazy lady asks us if there is _any _part of the body we are uncomfortable massaging before we begin. Naturally, I had to say something obnoxious. "Theee VaaGinaaa" (said in a stupid accent), so crazy-face turns around and shouts "WHAT WAS THAT?"

So Tara, the sweet girl that she is, _covers _for me saying "FEET! I can't _STAND _touchin' Feet!"

About half an hour later, the first client shows up. She's this weird housewife type woman wearin a JLo brand sweat suit and flip-flops. So the massage therapist asks "Who here didn't like massaging feet?"

Right away I point to Tara, waiting to see how hilarious it'll all play out! Tara starts shaking her head saying, "Not me! I _LOOOOVE _feet!"

So JLo kicks off her sandals and reveals the _dirtiest_, mangled feet and toes I've ever seen! So they DRAG Tara to these nasty feet and make her get into every nook and cranny. I swear I've never seen a black girl turn so white in all my life!

Then as soon as she's done, I'm just standing there laughing, Tara started rubbing her hands all over my _face_! She got it in my mouth!"

All the guys were laughing, but Claude slid a shot glass of rum her way.

"Well, although it was _Very _Entertaining, an awful lot of your story was more _Tara _than _Sookie_."

Instead of arguing, Sookie mumbled an apology and threw back the shot like a champ.

Cards were drawn and Sookie prayed for a face card. This time CLAUDE lost and Sookie stuck her tongue out at him childishly, the rum and beer was beginning to take effect.

"Once upon a time..." Claude stood up and began to gesture wildly to his audience, "during our wild and crazy college days, my friend _Eric _here invited me to a party at cousin Pam's place. I was hesitant to go, because I've seen the way girls get around Eric at parties, and I was SO sure he'd ditch me and I'd be stuck trying to converse with ditzy girls with nothing interesting to say."

Sookie let out a "WhoopWHOOP" and clinked glasses with her brother. Claude continued.

"But Eric was the perfect roommate and drank whatever I handed to him. Now Eric isn't a small man, there isn't _any _part of Eric that's small (Sookie snorted through her nose), and with all that muscle mass it takes a lot before he can work up a good buzz. I never gave up though, and before long, this asshole was completely shit-faced drunk!"

So we're playing beer pong, and I look over, I don't know WHERE he found them but Eric is just SNARFING Down these bratwursts! Not just that, he's dipping these cold brats in a jar of cheese dip. I don't know how he did it, but somehow he got that giant fucking hand of his completely lodged in this jar! AND WE'RE IN THE MIDDLE OF A FUCKING GAME TOO!

So I yell at him "GET CHO HANDS OUTTA THAT CHEESE!" and Eric freezes, shoulder's up, this priceless look on his face like a child caught with his hand in the cheese jar! Haha, so he finally squeezes his banana hand outta the jar, it's completely covered in liquid cheese and he grabs a pong ball and takes aim!

Right away the girls we're playing start freaking out about getting cheese in their beer, so I kick his ass towards the bathroom and he agrees that yes, he probably _should _wash off all the cheese. He came back good to go, so I didn't think anything of it.

Eric coughed and clutched his chest, laughing because he _Just _remembered how stupid they were back in college. The Stackhouse siblings could sense his anxiety and leaned closer towards Claude, waiting for the story to get good.

I get a call from Pam the next morning. She said she was hungover and walked into her bathroom and there was just a cheese massacre! I guess it started with the light switch, then a giant STREAK of cheese across the wall, all the way to her perfect white towels now turned brown, except for the spices in the cheese dip, all hardened and gross! Haha, she never could get those towels back to their original color!"

Everyone laughed and Eric scratched the back of his head.

"She still has those towels, makes me use them whenever I stay the night at her new place."

"Another!" Sookie cheered as she grabbed a card and put it to her head. It was facing the wrong direction so Eric leaned over and flipped it for her. Finally Alcide drew the losing card.

It was then that Eric realized his friend had been particularly quiet for too much of the game. He would laugh at all the stories, yes, but he wasn't his usual chatty self. Eric quirked an eyebrow to him and tilted his head as if to ask "What's wrong bro?". Alcide shrugged and sipped from his beer.

"I'm sorry, I just don't think I'm as funny as ya'll are. This game was much easier earlier when it was just simple stuff, like first time touching a breast and who's your favorite super hero..." It irked Eric not knowing who Sookie's favorite super hero was...and if she touched another womans breasts...

"Aw, you're just overthinkin' things!" Jason Stackhouse clapped a hand over Alcide's broad shoulder. "You probably have a _million _funny stories about yourself, you probably just consider them more embarrassing than funny! Tell ya what, _Sookie'll _go first, take a topic we all can relate to, then You just think of a story, even if it's not Great! AND she'll drink her shot, no matter how boring your story is!"

"Yeah! Come on Alcide!" Sookie encouraged, hoisting her beer bottle into the air. "I'll go easy, let's see. What's a good one, an easy one we all laugh at?" Eric zeroed in on her lip she was tugging through her teeth. She had such a beautiful mouth.

"Oo, talk about farts!"

"Jason Stackhouse! Haha, that would be funny though. I tell ya' what, I got a story about pee, Alcide must have peed at one time or another!"

Jason poured himself a shot of rum while he laughed and nodded in agreement. Eric popped his questioning eyebrow and Jas shrugged. "What? I'm thirsty!"

"Alright Alcide. On my graduation night it was raining cats and dogs. My friend Tara and I rode to our friends party and drank heavily, as most graduates do. Somehow in the evening, I ended up wearing a child's play army helmet and Tara lost her phone and glasses. THEN, I get a phonecall to go to another party being held at the One hotel in Bon Temps.

Right away I said "no thanks", it was raining, my car was parked a couple blocks away. I was having a good time where I was, thank you! Anyway, they all called again and made Tara get on the line. Apparently, _someone _had life changing news for me and Tara, being such a hopeless romantic drags me into the streets to walk back to my car so we can drive to this hotel party.

It had stopped raining, but the roads were still muddy and all. So there we were, fancy Graduation dresses, my white high heels and army helmet and we're walking in the mud to go back to my car! _That's _when I get the urge to Pee.

We still had a block to go and my bladder was about to burst! Tara, who was probably more drunk than myself points to the yard behind me and tells me to pee behind this giant rosebush.

Now I don't normally go running around peeing in people's front yards, but this was an emergency! So I ran over in my muddy high heels, adjust my fancy graduation dress, and _just _as I get down to business, a sensor light goes off illuminating the **whole front yard**, and there i am -_exposed_- right in front of their living room window!

Then Tara, my best friend, THE SELLOUT, laughs like a maniac as she runs down the street, just leaving me there!"

Sookie drank happily as she basked in her roommates laughter. She was surrounded by beautiful men and they all just seemed so happy! It was strange how normally she'd die of embarassment sharing these stories from her past, but she was completely at ease with the men around her, Even Eric!

By all accounts, she had every reason to be weird and standoffish when it came down to Eric Northman. Even after her embarassing flasher moment earlier, she still found herself watching him throughout the drinking game. She'd forget how to breathe whenever their eyes would meet, but there was just something about the look on his face. After each story he would just stare at her with...Admiration?

Bill couldn't _be_ more opposite than Eric. He had never appreciated Sookie's sense of humor and probably would have scolded her on her unladylike behavior that night. Sookie cherished every embarrassing adventure with Tara! She took another drink thinking about their big fallout two years ago (over Bill Compton) and promised herself to make things right again.

Tara would love the guys, she just knew it. They were always up for a good time and didn't take themselves too seriously (most of the time), just like her oldest friend.

Jason was laughing harder than he did the first time he had heard the graduation story, but Sookie figured he was just happy to be around her (and laughing) again. The last time he had visited was horribly unpleasant because of Bill, go figure... Those few times they could stand to be in the same room with one another were spent arguing over what would be best for Sookie, as if she were a child!

Jason, almost reading Sookie's thoughts, reached for her hand. At first she thought he would hold her hand sweetly, instead he gripped it, lifted it, and began a secret handshake Sookie hadn't used in years! It was fairly simple but had a lot of stylish moves, like blowing on pretend dice and Rollin' em back into another quick shake until their thumbs and index fingers pushed together to create a "Snap"!

She had really missed Jason.

"Alright Alcide, now you've gotta have a Pee story from sometime in your life! Maybe you had an accident in gradeschool?"

Alcide wouldn't make eyecontact with anyone and was fidgeting in his seat.

"Come on, Shugga..." Sookie batted her long eyelashes at him, "Now how am I supposed to pretend to be your new flame when you're practically a stranger to me?" Her accent was in full-swing.

"Sookie, it's not like any of these stories are gonna come up at the wedding! I'm not planning on throwing it out there that you peed in someone's front yard!"

"Well, at least we'd be able to make inside jokes out of em, and I say the game is Plenty Useful! Are you trying to say you won't protect me if a bee flies by during the ceremony?"

Sookie began to pout as she stared up at him with her big innocent eyes.

"Well of course I would, cher! Hell, I'd of probably done that even _before _I heard your story!" Jason Stackhouse began to bat _his _eyelashes flirtatiously to Alcide while Eric chugged the rest of his beer in a sad attempt of drowning his woes.

"My kind'a Man, mmmm!" Jason stood up and maneuvered around the sectional to take a seat next to Alcide Herveaux (Kudos Lafayette!). He practically sat in the man's lap and Alcide cleared his throat, uncomfortable with Jason's level of bromancy.

"I suppose I do have a urination story, sort of." Sookie and Jason cheered enthusiastically. "One time, during college, Debbie and I were on a break. Well, one thing led to another and I ended up drunk and flirting with this Coed at some bar. She starts telling me how bad she wants me and suggests I follow her back to her place in my truck.

So this girl tells me to meet her in the basement, which apparently is her bedroom. She starts arguing with her roommates upstairs. Those girls were telling her not to hook up with me, so I was just walking around that basement real annoyed-like, AND, I Really needed to take a piss!

There was no bathroom down there but there WAS a kitty litter box in the corner..." Jason began to laugh hysterically, and from the look on Alcide's face, the story didn't end there.

"I had no idea I had to pee THAT bad, but I literally flooded that litter box. Anyway, she came down and we ended up having weird, drunk-person sex before I passed out.

The next MORNING, I wake up to the sounds of this cat HOWLING in my face. Never heard a cat meow that loud in my life. Somehow the girl slept through it, but the cat started to burrow into the blanket that was covering up our naked assess. I was _barely _waking up, I had No Idea what was going on, and before I have a chance to even wake the girl up, her cat shits on her bed! Right in the blankets!"

"Fuck! Looks like I'll be taking that shot now!"

Eric continued to laugh as he poured the rum then handed the full shot to Sookie. Their fingers touched and rum sloshed over their hands and all over the coffee table between them. Eric hesitated meeting her beautiful eyes, but Sookie just smiled and swallowed the liquid with minimal wincing. Eric couldn't quite break their eyecontact as he slowly sucked the rum off his fingers into his mouth. Typical Sookie, she blushed and bit down on her bottom lip.

"Oh, I wasn't finished. That girl was out like a light so I just left her sleeping in a cat shit bed. I could see the litter box in the corner as I left, and the entire box looked like it had cemented into a giant grey brick!"

"ALCIDE! HAHA, I CAN'T BELIEVE YOU DID ALL THAT!" Alc shrugged and looked away while everyone cracked up. Jason laughed so hard he collapsed to the floor gasping for air. Sookie had never seen a full grown man like Alcide blush that hard before. He was as red as a tomato!

Claude poured another shot for Sookie, this time she actually pouted for their sympathy but Jason began to chant "Drink, Drink, Drink!", so she had no choice but to choke down the vile spicy fluid.

"Blehk! Why didn't we play this game with Whiskey?" Sookie leaned back, resting her weight on her hands. She started to hum to herself, flexing her ankles back and forth, flicking her feet daintily.

Good Lord, she was a cute drunk.

Alcide was obviously feeling more confident after hearing the feedback from the group. He was the First to draw a card for the next round. Sookie lost.

"Eric, beer me." As the Viking retrieved her beverage Sookie puffed out her cheeks thinking of something embarrassing from her past. The alcohol sure wasn't helping in the memory department. Alcide had her wait until he came back from peeing to tell her story. He didn't want to miss anything.

Once she decided and Alcide returned from the bathroom, she took a few gulps of amber golden goodness and whispered "Maudette Pickens" to Jason, shaking her head in disappointment. Jason chucked the cap from the top of his newest beer at her.

"My senior year of high school, I took a few dual credit courses to give me a leg up for college. The class was pretty small, was mostly all the same kids I saw in all my honors classes during the day." The guys began to tease her quietly with "ooo, _honors_ classes!", but quietly enough to not interrupt the tale.

"Anyway, our instructor, Ms. _Pickens_, one of those OLDER ladies that dresses far too young for her age, AND SIZE?" Jason cringed. "Well she positioned all our desks into a giant 'U' shape, so you had a good look at everybody in the room, and she'd always be front and center of everyone's eyes.

So one fateful week, I had been staying over with a friend of mine's for a few days since Gran was outta town with the Descendants of the Glorious Dead group. (The guys raised eyebrows in question, but Sookie didn't stop to elaborate)

So we were running late for class, I just threw on my Jeans from the night before and we headed out!

Now, all throughout this class I felt something bothering me, like, bunched up in my pant-leg! So finally I kicked it free, big mistake. I kicked my dirty Panties from the day before _directly _to the center of the room! Bright orange thong, right where everyone could see!"

Laughter. Jason and Claude took a shot of rum together singing their "FRIENDS FOREVER" toast they developed the night before.

Everyone grabbed another card, Alcide actually switched cards with Jason before they revealed them via forehead. It wasn't necessary. Sookie lost AGAIN.

"FUCK MY LUCK!" Sookie finished another beer. She could drink pretty well for a girl.

"Alright, alright, I got one. YEARS ago, I bought Hunter a German Shepherd puppy for his birthday. We named Gambit. I was trying REAL hard to potty train that Mutha, so it was, like, 4 in the morning, freezing outside and i'm walking this damn dog trying to get it to do it's thing. Finally, it went and I hurried us back inside a' Grans' Farmhouse!

I threw Gambit the treat, but he was being a little BITCH and refused to eat it!" Drunk Sookie had a mouth on her! Sook took another sip of beer, probably didn't help the situation... "So he just left this treat on the floor, and THEN-I looked UP!

There, _scaling the wall_, was the GODZILLA of all COCKROACHES! I've never seen one that big, especially at Gran's place! I ain't a fan of Roaches, and HUGE ones haunt my DREAMS! They FLY, did you know that?" She stared into Eric's eyes, asking him honestly. He smirked and nodded that he did, in Fact, know they could Fly.

"Right, so It had to die, _obviously_. Problem was, Gran's kitchen had SUPER-duper tall ceilings and this Bad-Boy was wayy too high outta my REACH! So I carefully formulated my plan..." Sookie put her hands together and touched her fingertips together evilly.

"I grabbed Gambo's tennis ball and a big-ass can of RAID. See, I'm the mutha fuckin' Jenna Jameson of Pong Stars in Renard Parish, so I was pretty damn confident I'd be able to nail a Foot long Cockroach with a tennis ball! After I murdalized him with the ball, I planned to spray enough Raid his legs would melt off!

Now I don't know HOW, but that Sumbitch KNEW, he just KNEW I had it out for him, and _Right _as I Cocked Back my Arm to peg him with the ball, the asshole started CHARGING ME down Gran's wall, like, runnin FULL SPEED!

I PANICKED! He threw off my plan! But suddenly he was within Range, so I jumped forward and fuckin' sprayed the FUCK outta that Roach! I sprayed so much Bug Killer that there was just this layer of White Foam Raid on the wall, couldn't even see the mega-cockroach beneath it! And THEN...It fell.

I SCREAMED like a little Bitch!"

The guys started laughing hysterically. Sookie was wasted and jumping all around the living room in panic/excitement, she was a damn good story teller, even when she was drunk.

"I didn't know where it landed! He fell behind gran's fridge, and I was BAREFOOT! He coulda come from outta _anywhere _and attacked me back for attempted murder! You never know! And then JASON somehow materialized in the kitchen." Everyone turned to Jason who was beet red and cough-laughing. He finally caught his breath enough to join in the story.

"I just heard SCREAMING, and Sookie doesn't scream! She's strong as shit! Sometimes you'll get a grunt-scream, but not shrieking, like a girl! I ran into that kitchen before my eyes even adjusted, and there was Sookie, fuckin' standing barefoot and in her underwear, a dog curled up shaking in the corner, and when I saw the big can of raid in her hands..just walked away laughing."

"Yeah! Way to help, brother! Then, the bug didn't show it's ugly face for a while, so I _slowly _started backing towards my room.. then my FOOT touched SOMETHING small and I SCREAMED all over again! It was just Gambit's damn treat he left on the floor! That poor puppy was so shaken up, thought I was SCREAMING at him!

I felt terrible so I let him sleep in my bed... Screwed up on that agenda, that damn dog STILL thinks he can sneak in my bed and not get kicked out!"

"Can't say I blame him..." Alcide mumbled under his breath. Claude kicked him, not too subtle.

"AGAIN!" Jason grabbed for his next card. "I predict...Sookie goes again!" She stuck her tongue out at her brother. Eric drew a losing 4.

"Er-ic, Er-ic, Er-ic, Er-ic!"

"Bout time you lost, Northman!" He took a long sip from his beer, smirking at Miss Sookie Stackhouse as he thought of a story that could be even _half _as funny as some of the things Sookie had experienced.

"-Not the greatest story teller around," Alcide reached over to clink his beer with Eric's, "but back during highschool, I participated in a few _slightly_ illegal pranks. You see, I'm a huge fan of futbol, or soccer? Yes, you people call it soccer."

"Whaddaya Mean, _You _people?" Jason instigated. Eric grinned, fully prepared to rile him up.

"You know...Rednecks?" Jason jumped up, still smiling but pretending to be affronted. Eric stood up too, ready for anything crazy-ass Jason Stackhouse was willing to dish out.

"_Boyyy_, sounds like you gots some _learnin' _to be had!" Jason pushed his sleeve up his bicep and Eric took a step towards the shorter man, easily towing over him. The tall viking contemplated suggesting how his Baby-Sister, an educator, could _teach _ him a thing or two...

Sookie saw the men square off in front of her and let out an unusual "Eep!" as she clambered to her feet, then carefully stood on the wobbly coffee table. She took a step closer to the dueling blondes and held her arms out to the side for balance.

"**Woah **Woah **Woah**! Let's tone it down a notch! I can't have my boys fighting, now can I? HELL, we were all getting along 10 seconds ago! C'mon, let's just get back to the game, _please_? Please guys? _Please_?" Jason tried his hardest to fight his emerging smile.

Jason Stackhouse was no slouch when it came to picking fights, and that always came natural whenever he was in close proximity to one William Compton. Never -**never**- had he seen Sookie jump in to put an end to an argument between he and Bill, and _maybe _it was the alcohol talking, but _suddenly _Sookie was jumping on tables to keep the peace between him and Eric. The fact that he and the Swede were only horsing around only Confirmed his suspicions...

Eric and Jason sat back down, hesitantly. They were grinning like fools, but Sookie was far too drunk to notice.

She still gave Jason the hairy eyeball before virtually swan-diving in between the two seated blondes. There wasn't much space between them, so Sookie ended up on both laps before Jason chuckled and moved over just enough for her to slide off of him. Eric never complained about her invasion of space.

Their fake fight was in "bad form" and was therefore considered a party foul. Both Eric and Jason agreed to the rum shots assigned to them by the game commissioner.

"So, as you were _Saying_, something about futbol," Sookie then turned to sneer at her brother, "the game where you kick a ball with your foot..."

"Yes, my brother and I played futbol in high school."

"YOU HAVE A BROTHER?" Eric was throughly enjoying himself. Sookie was so surprised to hear there was more than one Northman,

"Pretty sure that wasn't the end of the story, Sook." Alcide grumbled out as Miss Stackhouse bowed her head (while blushing profusely) respectfully nodding for Eric to continue.

"Yes, well, Henrik and I played on the same team, of course, and we had a healthy rivalry between ours and another school.

We beat them almost every match, but they were sore losers. We couldn't prove it at the time, but they slashed my brothers tires." Sookie gasped, her eyes wide with horror! Eric smiled sweetly at her drunken-overreaction. He reached towards her face, rubbed his thumb over the worried wrinkle in her brow and continued.

"Oh _we retaliated_. Henrik stole their captain's girlfriend and I sent the goalie's mother flowers. After the personal attacks, they targeted our school. Lots of graffiti. So we needed to prank them Back...

Their mascot was a dragon, so in the center if their courtyard stood a giant metal dragon. That night, Henrik and I snuck into their school with grandfather's tools and blow-torch and welded a giant metal penis onto their giant metal dragon."

Jason spit out his beer and the rest of the gang rolled onto one another, howling with laughter. Alcide got up to "drain the lizard" and Somehow Sookie ended up laying with her head on Eric's lap and her feet on Jason's, getting a light foot-rub no less!

"Well. Never get _this girl _started on PRANKS.. " Eric quirked his eyebrow at Jason.

"Oh?"

"Yes. This is the most creative bitch you'll ever meet!" Jason threw her foot down unceremoniously (back into his lap). "Yeah, I've lost a few prank-wars to her over the years. Her timing is incredible, she always gets ya when you would never see it coming!"

"Yep. I'm the Prank KING!" Sookie smiled to herself, her eyes closed as Eric ran his fingers through her hair (something everyone saw yet no one mentioned out loud).

"Don't you mean Prank Queen?"

"No honey," Jason stared Claude dead in the eyes, "She's the King!"

"Give us an example," Alcide requested as he took a seat next to Claude, fresh beer in hand.

"Well, I was an accomplice during this prank so I'm sure I'll be able to tell it better than this lightweight, here." Jason picked up her foot and dropped it for emphasis.

"Hey!"

"Besides," Jason cut her off, "there's a few circumstances I should probably come clean about.."

"Like what?" Sookie asked as she sat up a bit from her giant Eric pillow. Jason just shrugged and began his tale.

"Long long time ago, Sook and I were gracing the halls of Bon Temps high school, though we ran in completely different circles, of course."

"Oh, of _course_!" Sookie gestured wildly with her arms, her head safely placed in Eric's lap.

"Don't be like that, everyone still knew your name!"

"Only because my graduating class barely had 40 students, bedsides, my name might as well have been "Jason's little sister"!"

"Right, so me and Jason's little sister -" Sookie ax kicked Jason's lap, "we pulled this hilarious prank on this guy I played football with."

"Why, what'd he do to you, er, to Sookie?

"Nothing, really." Sookie shrugged, Eric felt it. "His name was J.B. DuRone. He was one of the most popular guys at our school, So so stupid, but easy on the eyes."

"They always are..." Claude added whistfully. Sookie giggled.

"I was harboring a crush of massive proportions! We were sophomores and he had told _all _of his friends this big scheme to get into my pants!"

Jason had wanted to tell this story, but Sookie was already carried away, what with the booze and sentimentality of it all.

"He was supposed to wait until Drivers Ed, tell me how long he had liked me and never had the balls to let me know, and THEN, planned to invite me over for a "Movie". Ugh, can you believe that guy?"

"Um, a movie invite? Yes, what a _douche_, inviting you to view a film!" Claude didn't get to enjoy his joke for long before Sookie nailed him in the face with a throw pillow that had previously been lodged under her shoulder.

"No no, it was his foolproof _technique_! He had already tried it out twice, once on Portia Bellfleur and another time with this upperclassman, Amy something or other..."

"Amy Burley." Jason added out of the blue.

"Rrright. So word on the street was, he'd invite 'em over, let them pick a movie out of his dad's _huge _DVD collection, and after a few moves, they'd head home hymen-free!

Well, I heard the _entire _thing, practically saw the blueprints, all Home-Alone style, with the paint cans and Hot Wheels? So Drivers Ed rolled around, and NOTHING! I had so many things planned to say to that Bastard, because I am a Lady, ya know? _Apparently_, I wasn't even worth his Joke Lay! Somehow, I think that hurt worse. As I was leaving that class, I overheard him asking Selah Pumphrey out to dinner then a movie at his place later.. I was crushed!" Sookie dramatically rested the back of her hand to her forehead and sighed.

"So I tricked Jason into helping me out. We snuck in through his window with a bunch of blank burnable DVDs and some Sharpies, replaced EVERY DVD we could with a blank one and renamed the title to something Similar, but Porn-sounding."

"Haha, and I always _Knew _you were creative Sook, but those titles? Phew! And you could just rename them like _That_! Didn't even have to think about 'em first!" Sookie started laughing and covered her face with her hands.

"What titles did you rename?"

"Shi'it, so many! Ya know, some were real easy to alter, like "men in blacks" or "Moulin Splooge", but the Kicker was the movie that dumb bitch actually picked out to watch, hahaha! "The DaVinci Load", Sook even drew the XXX on the disc!"

The guys all laughed, drinking from their beers and shaking their heads.

"You got a few good ones too, Jas. Ha, come on, Pulp Friction? You even got his Disney movies! Loin King!"

"Haha, yep. But I think it's time I came clean, Sook. J.B. was really in love with ya." Sookie laughed/scoffed and it came out as a "Pffvt!". "No, seriously. I'm not sure what Preston and the boys told you, but he was going to tell you how he had been in love with you for years."

"Jason, I know you guys have become friends over the years but you Really don't have to cover for him!" Jason set his beer down and eyed Sookie seriously.

"What? Now that you guys are drinkin buddies at Merlotte's, you're feeling guilty about the Movie Prank!" Sookie was sitting up now, the comfort of Eric's fingers stroking her scalp completely forgotten.

"We had always been friends, Sook. Football, Football camp, hell, Stackhouse and DuRone go all the way back to black eyes on the playground!"

"You mean knocked out teeth..." Sookie grumbled.

"Look, the point is, yes, J.B. was gonna confess his feelings for ya. And..I'm the reason he never breathed a word if it to you. We had, a TALK." Drunk-Sookie gasped. "Sook, we both know he was Dumber than a box of hair! The guy's all foam, no beer. He's a good friend, just not good enough for My baby sister! You woulda tired of him anyhow!"

"Maybe, maybe not Jas! Woulda been nice to let me make up My Own mind about a guy, though!" Sookie huffed and crossed her arms over her chest.

Eric hated this J.B. character immensely. He didn't have to grow up with the Stackhouse's to know that "having a little talk" with Jason wouldn't be enough to keep him away from someone as great as Sookie.

Alcide could sort of understand. It's not like he spent his every waking hour with Sookie, but it was still clear she was out of his league intellectually. Luckily, she was raised right, and always kept things light depending on the present company. He had never seen her treat anyone with disrespect, except for maybe Bill.

Claude jumped out of his seat making a mad dash down the hall, temporarily stunning the angry crowd into silence. He emerged grinning like a fool and waving a nice bottle of vodka in the air. Claude wasted no time in pouring a shot for both Jason and Sookie.

"I don't know what I'm so upset about. It's not like I'd _want _to be with someone who would Cave so easily, ya know?" Eric raised his beer and nodded his head in agreement.

She knew Jason was right about him too. She always had a lot of fun with JB, they'd joke and hang out, but she spent a lot of her time explaining her jokes to him... It definitely wouldn't have lasted, but it still made her feel warm and fuzzy inside knowing she sort of had OPTIONS back then. Bill used to love rubbing it in (all the time) that he was the only one REMOTELY interested in her during highschool, and now Jason had proved him wrong!

"Yeah Sook, and honestly, I was only gung-ho for the prank because I had a thing for Amy. Couldn't let the guy slide for stealing That Cherry, friend or not!" Sookie made a disgusted "blehk" noise before consuming the vodka.

"Well there's another thing, Jas! If he was _Soo _in love with me, how could he do all these other girls?"

"Well that's easy," Jason shrugged. Sookie raised her eyebrows waiting for him to explain. "Practice."

"Are you serious?" As if it were the most normal thing in the world. Practice? The rest of the guys seemed to mumble/grunt in agreement with Jason.

In a brotherly fashion, he reached over and rubbed the top of her head wildly, tangling up her blonde hair. She couldn't help but smile.

Eric caught himself staring for the millionth time and forced himself to look at the empty bottle in his hands. He knew, beyond a shadow of a doubt, there was no other woman in the world like Sookie Stackhouse.

The women Eric was used to would bitch incessantly if even a single hair was out of place, and then there's Sookie...Her hair just got completely effed up and she was smiling about it! How could he not fall in love with her?

Eric felt a cold shiver run through his body. Love?

It wasn't like he didn't believe in the _Idea _of love. He had seen it all first hand, watching the way his father would look at his mother all those many years ago. But his feelings for Sookie were completely unexpected. They hardly knew each other. Eric tried to reevaluate things, but there was no denying it, he was head over heels for the girl! Every moment with her was just one surprise after another.

Just because he had an epiphany and knew exactly how felt about Sookie Stackhouse didn't make things easier for him. He still didn't deserve her and their friendship was already on shaky ground.

The rest of the guys got up to stretch, eat, piss, etc., but Eric watched Sookie as she stood, stumbled a bit, righted herself and made a beeline for the television. Eric tried to hide the disappointment of seeing her _kneel _down in front of their electronics instead of _bending _over in front of it. Come on, she was wearing a skirt! He'd kill a man for that kind of view.

Sookie squealed with delight after adjusting something in front of her and mumbled something like 'hope it's not scratched" before music started to play. She cranked up the volume and spun around/stood all at once, like a graceful dancer.

The music sounded very European, sort of like gypsy music? Sookie sang along, dancing towards the coffee table, and snagging the bottle of vodka.

She danced her way to Jason who also happened to know the words (a song suggesting one should start wearing purple, wearing purple) and they danced around and spun around, languidly, taking turns sipping from the bottle of Vodka. Claude joined in on the dancing, clapping in gypsy fashion, while Alcide opened another beer to sip, just enjoying all the craziness around him. He might be anti-dancing, but he was thoroughly entertained.

Eric, also swept up in the music, revealed A hidden bottle of wine in the kitchen and Sookie swore that one day she'd find all their secret stashes of goods, including their batcave of porn.

With all of the swinging of elbows, shots of vodka, and numerous glasses of wine, Eric didn't really notice he was drunk until he asked what the name of the gypsy band was. Sookie and Jason shouted out "Gogol Bordello" over and over, but gave up after Eric drunkenly repeated "Gargoyle Armadillo?"

The "get to knew you" game was long forgotten and Jason was leaning intimately into Eric's neck, whispering more of Sookie's childhood fears which were SURE to come in handy later. Claude and his warm bottle of wine were swaying to imaginary music. Alcide was lounging on the sectional, his eyes were closed but his feet continued to tap every so often, like a signal he was still awake. Sookie was lying on the floor.

She looked like an angel. Her hair splayed out around her in frizzy waves reminding Eric of his mother and her great love of Stevie Nicks. Her eyes were closed, her hands were clasped together over her slightly exposed belly button, and one ankle was crossed over the other (very ladylike). She was mumbling to herself.

Eric gently maneuvered out of Jason's embrace and kneeled down beside Sookie. He couldn't make out what she was saying.

"Sookie, you're speaking in tongues." Sookie giggled. It was adorable, and to Eric it sounded a bit like a guinea pig. He smiled and ghosted his fingertips over her cheek. Claude winked at Jason.

"BED." It was Sookie's one simple command. Eric nodded and lifted her gently into his arms, moving down the hallway while the tiny blonde nuzzled into his chest.

"Put her in my room," Claude shouted out to him, "since Jason's sleeping in The _Potato Sack_!" Claude laughed hysterically-hard at his own Joke, but Eric wasn't About to let her stay cuddled up next to someone as devious as Claude.

"She doesn't have to share with you. She can sleep on the pull-out in my suite." Eric continued on his journey.

"In that case, man, tuck her into in her OWN bed, I'll bunk with you in _your Suite_." He wanted to argue, but Jas actually looked serious for the first time all night. He nodded to Jason and carried Sookie to her bedroom.

She continued to smile up at Eric with her big, beautiful, blue eyes that she could barely keep open. He placed her gently on top of her sheets, admiring what all she had done to her room. There were a bunch of framed drawings around the room, her bookcase was stocked, and her desktop was even set up already. She must have kept Alcide busy since there was a railing on her ceiling that went around her bed with long white lacey curtains attached.

Sookie lifted her hips off the bed, indicating Eric should pull her covers down so she slide under and get comfy between the sheets, but Eric had to bite his cheek to ignore the small fantasy of Sookie lifting her hips so he could slide her skirt and panties off.

He pulled down the blankets and Sookie snuck her legs underneath them, yawning.

"Um, do you...do you need help, er, want to slip into something more comfortable? For bed?"

She giggled her cute guinea pig giggle and shook her head.

"Nope!" she said, popping the 'p'. "You wouldn't wanna help," she leaned forward to whisper, "I'm not wearing any underwear!"

Eric's Pants felt incredibly tight. She was naked under that outfit? He struggled all night not staring at her nipples knowing she wasn't wearing a bra, but the fact that she was so close to him, wearing a skirt with nothing underneath had him sweating.

"Why?" He asked, more breathy than usual. He wanted to kick himself the minute the word slipped out; he really didn't care _why _she chose to forego panties!

"Somebody brought me an outfit but no _undergarments_. And this wasafter he _saw it all_!" Drunk Sookie shimmied in her bed as she said it and Eric laughed. He ran his hands through his lengthy blonde hair.

"You're killing me Stackhouse..." She was so wasted she actually cocked her head to the side like a confused puppy. "You shouldn't tease me with this kinda stuff, especially since I _Saw. It. All_."

Sookie shuddered at the huskiness of his voice, THEN she realized what he had just said!

"So, did you see..._everything_?" She blushed. Eric couldn't resist, so he leaned over to whisper into her ear.

"I didn't know you were so fond of _hearts_, Sookie." She let out her embarassed "Eeep!" and covered her face while Eric laughed at her.

"It's just a bikini wax," she mumbled through her hands. "I sunbathe ALL the time!"

He coughed to cover up his laughter and started to get up, but Sookie grabbed his wrist and pulled him towards her. Eric complied and stretched out beside her, holding her hand in between them. He was thankful for the sheet that still lay between their bodies.

"I had fun, did you have fun?" She never let Eric answer. "I'm so sorry." She pouted. "I USUALLY don't drink this mush! But I Missed Jas, and I MISSED you!" He smiled at her as she yawned again.

"You should sleep little one, you're probably gonna feel like Hell in the morning." She nodded, her perfect blue eyes fluttering closed.

"Eric, are we friends?" Eric's breath escaped him. He wasn't quite sure what the appropriate response should be. Yes?

"Is that what you want from me Sookie? My friendship?" She smiled, eyes closed.

"Yes." Eric knew better than to feel disappointed, but he still wanted to run from her room. "I'm too afraid to ask for anything more..." she whispered.

Eric's heart stopped.

He waited for her to say something, _anything _more. Just complete silence, the only sound in the room seemed to be his heart hammering away in chest and ears. As soon as Sookie let out an animalistic SNORE (that by _all _means should have woken her up) he chuckled and slipped silently out of her room.

So it was _sort of_ a drunk admission of her liking him more than she let on, but it still helped put his mind at ease after his major fuck-up that afternoon.

As soon as he rounded the corner to the kitchen, Claude, Jason and even Alcide froze as though they were guilty of something. They were all holding the bags of red Solo cups Eric had stored in the pantry.

"Hey, is she asleep?"

"Um, yea?"

"Jason had a good idea-" Jas held his hand out to stop the guys from saying too much.

"Got an idea to start an old fashioned prank war with Sookie. Question _is_, where do Your allegiances lie?" Jason quirked his eyebrow, waiting for Eric's response.

Eric grinned and joined the rest of the men at the sink...

* * *

><p>(2 hours later, after Phase 1 of their prank)<p>

"Alright, bed's good to go, got your blankets, pillow. Think you need anything else?" Eric turned to look at the shorter man next to him.

"Naw man, this is good." The two bumped fists and Eric moved to his closet. As he slid the doorway over Jason jumped into the closet like a kid during Christmas!

"Holy shit, Eric! This is some crazy 007 shit right here! Does this lead to a secret passage way to the billiards room?" Eric chuckled and retrieved a pair of sleep pants for the night. He couldn't remember the last time he had to "cover up" for sleep.

Jason's eyes widened as Eric began to disrobe right in front of him and quickly made himself scarce. Eric thought Jason would be getting comfy on the pull-out bed but found Mr. Stackhouse lying in a joking/suggestive position on his own bed.

"Comfortable?" Jason just laughed and rubbed the sheets invitingly. Eric shrugged and lay down next to him anyway.

"You like my sister." Eric placed his hands beneath his head, secretly hoping that the view of his arm-muscles might be enough to show Jason he wouldn't be intimidated by one of his famous "talks".

"I think you'd be good for her." Eric's head snapped around to stare at Jason with disbelief. "I'm serious here, Eric."

"Jason, I don't know what you're talking about."

"Well of course you do! You don't even have to try and hide it. Hell, you can just shut up and let me do all the talking."

"Listen, it's not what you th-"

"Don't act dumb, I saw the way you look at her! Hell, she looks at you the exact same way!" Eric tensed but searched Jason's face to make sure he was telling the truth and not just fuckin' with him.

"Jason-"

"Don't try to talk your way out of it. You're probably TERRIBLE at poker, Northman! I saw how you reacted when you first saw me, then when you realized who I really was! I just spent an **entire **evening watching you stare at my sister with stars in your eyes! Hell, before I even got here, Gran asked me to check you out and see if you were everything Sookie claimed you were...

Listen, I **know **Sookie. I know that I haven't seen her this happy in years. I know that she's comfortable enough to dance like a fucking gypsy around you, I know she woulda thrown a punch at me if I didn't stop hassling you during your story for our drinking games! You know that Sookie's never let anyone carry her, _ever_? She could be drunk out of her skull, and _Insist _that she'd rather crawl home than let anyone pick her up and carry her-"

"Why?"

"Oh, well, I'm sure she's still carrying around weight issues from middle school. I suppose I should just tell ya her whole life story so you can get a sense of where she's coming from, because you'll be _fucked _if you try to compare her to any other girl you know. I can't say I'mma tell you _everything _about her, because there's a big part of Sookie's life she's just gotta tell you herself. You hear it from me and you'll look at her differently, and she'd kick my ass if she found out _I_ was the reason you started acting strange."

Eric paled and Jason's words. Deep down he always knew there had to be some giant skeleton in Sookie's closet. Nobody could be THAT perfect, and Jason was just waiting to drop this bomb on him that'd have him running for the hills, the sadistic son of a bitch! Almost as if Jason could feel his inner turmoil, he tapped Eric's calf with his big toe.

"It's nothing _bad_, just, usually people see what she's done and all these guy's wanna propose and shi'it."

Eric growled a little.

"Life hasn't been so easy for her, ya know, I mean, even before Bill. Our parents died in a flash flood when we were young. Too fuckin' young, man. Sookie was only 4 when it happened and I _know _it kills her inside that she can't remember them all that well.

Our Gran took care of us, we didn't have a lot of money growing up, but we always had a lot of love...and biscuits, and the best creamed corn you've ever tasted!" Eric cleared his throat and Jason apologized for getting off topic.

"Years went by, we were happy, but Sookie wasn't always the best looker. Short, chunky all around, braces, those thick dorky glasses she loves so much. Yea, she got teased a lot, but she was still just lovable ol' Sookie! She had tons of friends, just, she let all that ugly go to her head, I guess.

Jesus, no one saw it coming, but pretty much _overnight_, she shot up 5 inches, all the weight settled to where it was supposed to, braces got taken off, and worst of all, these enormous boobs showed up out of nowhere, I swear I got suspended from school from kicking so many kids' asses! Ya know, with our daddy being gone and all, I needed to look after her, but Sook was so focused on...other things...she never even noticed all the attention she was getting.

I mean, I suppose in a way I'm kinda grateful to Bill. Sookie deserved more than the kinda life a Bon Temps guy could offer her, but that didn't mean she had to spend the rest of her life chained up to him! Guy's a fucking vampire, I swear! For _Years_, he sucked the fun right out of her soul! I've seen my sister joke, laugh, dance, drink and curse more in these last two days than she has in five years!"

That sentence brought a small smile to Eric's face.

"So anyway, some **Stuff **happened, and Sook? She had to grow up fast. Too fast. But Sookie never once complained! She's good at being responsible. You'll see! She'll always have her rent in on time, you'll never just be _out _of something, like peanut butter, or Paper towels! Hell, she'll probably make sure each of you guys brush your teeth every night!" Eric chuckled. That was something he noticed about Sookie right away. She had barely been living there a week and mothered all the guys; always making sure they were fed.

"Not necessarily a bad thing! She gets it from our Gran. Now **THERE'S **a good woman, you'll see when you meet her."

"Yea?" Eric did a piss-poor job of hiding his excitement. Hearing Jason give his blessing on pursuing his sister could just be another one of those famous Stackhouse pranks, but Jas brought up meeting the woman who _raised them_ like it was **Going **to happen. Eric allowed himself to hope Jason was 100% serious about this little talk.

"Yeah. Gran's gonna love you. She never thought Bill was good enough for Sook, but she might have a heart attack once she gets a look at you!" Eric smirked. "Yeah, and her Heart might Stop when she imagines how pretty y'alls babies will turn out!" The Northman smirk vanished. "Hahaha, I'm just kidding, Eric! Gran's healthy as a horse!"

"You Stackhouse's...big family of comedians," Eric grumbled as he tried to get comfy for sleep.

"It's true. Never met a Stackhouse I didn't like! Now, let's get down to brass tax. You're in love with Sookie..." Eric swallowed the pool of spit that formed in his mouth. "Course you are, Sook's amazing. I know I can't tell you _everything _she's done, but Eric, you'll never find another girl like her. She fucking deserves to be happy. Now I know my sister, and from the way she speaks about you, hell, the way she looks at you, I know you're the one that can bring that girl back."

"Jason, don't put all this faith in me, I've already fucked up, there's no way-"

"Oh, you mean that girl you brought home with you? Shi'it, Northman, there's nothing to worry about! I told you, I **know **my sister!" Jason slapped Eric's bare shoulder. "Right now, Sookie's under the impression she ain't good enough for you. She wants you to be happy and _Expects _you to go for those women she thinks out class her.

She's no stranger to the way you've treated your women, so it's not like seeing you with someone else came out of left field and broke her heart. You've never formally declared y'all are going steady and all that shit. You never said you're serious about one another, and honestly, that's the kinda thing she needs right now! Just keep it casual." Eric stared at him incredulously and Jason shrugged.

"The girl just broke up with a guy she's been faithful to for 6 years! YEARS! Ended a relationship with a man she planned to marry, buy a house with, have his fucking babies, grow old with!" Eric's teeth were clenched together so hard his head began to ache.

"Seriously Eric, she Doesn't need to jump into something that serious again. Last time she did it she was lucky she got out before making the biggest mistake of her life! She's scared of making those same mistakes.

She likes you, but she knows good and well you're not a one woman kinda man. She's too smart to invest much in someone with _your _reputation. THAT, plus she doesn't think she's worthy of ya doesn't help much...

So you've Gotta tread carefully, she spooks real easy. You've gotta grow on her like a fungus! Be there for her when she needs ya, like you have been, no more bringing bitches home, and most importantly, DON'T PURSUE HER."

"_What_?"

"I'm serious. It's been so long since Sookie's been able to make her own decisions. She needs to feel in control of her own life. She'll come to you when she thinks she's ready.

Eric, I know i'm asking a lot, and if you're as much like me as I think you are, you're gonna have to make a bunch of changes and have a lot of patience. -And probably a case of blue balls."

"Jason! I think you're getting _way _ahead of yourself here. I mean, I may have pursued her a little, but it didn't work out. It's like, for every step forward we take 12 back.

I'm not really sure why you've got all this faith in me either! I'm sure everyone in this house has told you I'm not a _relationship _kind of man, Aren't I the kind of guy you want to keep _away _from your little sister?"

"Nah, she's a scrappy little thing and I know for a fact that girl Is stronger than she looks. She can take care of herself just fine. I've learned my lesson, let Sook choose her own men, otherwise, that insecure nerd next door will end up with another asshole like Bill.

You and I are a lot alike, Northman. And as far as I'm concerned, for guys like us, its not so much changing our whole way of life, it's more like, you've been waiting for **this **girl all along."

Jason smiled to himself, looking wistfully at nothing in particular before adding:

"Besides, if you REALLY fuck up, I've got my shotgun."

,,,,,,,,,,


	11. Chapter 11

Apologies for the last excessively large last chapter! Thanks again for all of the amazing reviews, it really means the world to me. Without further ado...

* * *

><p>Ch. 11.<p>

Sookie awoke with the unmistakeable urge to vomit. She rubbed the crust from her eyes as she sat up in her bed, (having no idea how she got there) and whipped back the curtain that encircled her bed.

Her head was still spinning, so she didn't even notice the **minefield **of red solo cups leading all the way to her bedroom door! Her feet accidentally kicked over a cup or two and Sookie sighed with relief finding they were only filled with water and nothing sticky/disgusting.

"WHAT THE FUCK?" She shouted loud enough to wake up whoever was responsible for the prank, probably Jason.

Sookie started to tip toe around the cups, but there were just so many! How could she have possibly slept through the guys putting _this many_ plastic cups from her bed all the way to her bedroom door!

"Son of A- WHO DID THIS? OH, You just opened up a Whole Can of Worms! YOU GUYS ARE LUCKY I'M LIKE CATHERINE FUCKING ZETA UP IN HERE!"

She had to admit, it was a pretty funny prank. A little water never hurt anyone. Her wine induced headache/hangover was somewhat forgotten with every carefully placed step around all the plastic cups. Sookie was surprised no one had come in to watch her struggle through the Danger Zone. Maybe they were just as hungover as she was and were lying comfortably in their beds, sleeping away the pain?

Finally, Sook had made her way to the cup-free doorway, managing to only spill 3 or 4 cups on her pilgrimage to the bathroom. She flung open the door taking a deep breath, ready to commence the shit-talking to whoever was responsible for her bedroom and was **SHOCKED **When a tidal wave of cold water poured over her bare feet and legs! A giant trash can filled with _gallons _of water was propped against the door just waiting for her to open it up. At the same time, another bucket _slammed _into her already throbbing skull, pouring ice cold water into her hair and drenching her blouse.

"Fuuuuck," she muttered to herself, arms out to the side, her teeth already chattering from the cold.

**Everyone **was standing in the hallway giggling like school girls while Sookie stood there awkwardly, looking much like a drowned rat! Droplets of water were falling from her chin and a fire for revenge was burning behind her eyes.

She scanned them each carefully, all topless, sexy, muscular, and **laughing**. No one seemed surprised, therefore they would each feel her wrath! Jason and Eric stood close together at the end of the hall, looking the _most _guilty (or smug) about the typhoon that mysteriously hit Sookie's room, so with a scathing sneer, she zeroed in on Eric.

"**How **_**COULD**_** You**?" Her tone and dead-serious expression caused every guy to stop laughing and hold their breath. Jason had said Sookie loved pranks, maybe her time with Bill had taken it's toll on her sense of humor?

Sookie almost felt bad for Eric. He had acted so victorious when she _first _exited the room, but since she had snapped at him, his giant blue eyes were filled with Panic! His shoulders dropped apologetically, and his Adams Apple bobbed up and down as he swallowed.

"Sookie, I, I'm-"

"You let me SLEEP, in that bed, same one as Jason, BEFORE YOU LET ME BURN THOSE SHEETS?" Alcide and Claude hunched over cracking up while Eric and Jason sighed in relief.

Magically, the need to _hurl _came back with a vengeance. Sookie politely excused herself from every half-naked man in the hall, making her way to the toilet.

After a good 10 minutes of projectile vomiting and flushing, Sookie finally exited the stall, somewhat embarrassed. Now everyone she lived with had heard her throwing up.

Topless Eric was leaning in the doorway, holding out her large fantasy football t-shirt, the one with the wizard. Her eyebrows lifted in surprise. She didn't realize she had left that dirty shirt in her locker. Sookie took the shirt from him and nodded her thanks before sneaking back into the stall to change out of her soaked clothes.

She blushed once she had fully disrobed. She couldn't remember the last time she had gone without wearing underwear for so long! Once covered by the dry T-shirt, she walked out of the stall, tossing her wet clothes at Eric's feet.

"I believe _you're _on laundry detail, Northman." He smirked but continued to lean against the doorway, his arms crossed in front of his chest.

Sookie turned towards the sink and held back the scream from seeing her reflection. She looked worse than she felt! Her hair was a greasy knot of dripping wet, blonde hair poking out in every direction. There were bags around her eyes mixed with her smeared eyeliner. She was pale despite her hard earned tan, and her mouth was filmy from the dryness of last nights sleep (plus her early morning upchuck).

She groaned seeing the reflection of Perfect fucking Eric Northman behind her, smirking. Sacrificing her humor and quick wit to the hangover gods, Sookie rolled her eyes and reached for her hair clip, pinning her disastrous hair back. Out of sight, out of mind! Oddly enough, the strange combo of dirty greasy hair and angle of the clip worked in her favor! She could never be good enough to style her hair in such a Rock fashion (with all that volume) during normal circumstances!

She reached for her tooth brush, going to _Town _cleaning up her mouth, minty toothpaste frothing around her mouth. Her eyes met Eric's a few times through the mirror, no words were exchanged, but they continued to smile at one another throughout Sookie's rigorous brushing. Things became embarrassing again as Sook brushed her tongue and gagged. Eric just laughed and escorted her wet clothes to the laundry room, leaving Sookie to groom herself in private.

Shirtless-Eric grabbed a couple of ibuprofen from the stash of pain relievers and cold medicines in the kitchen before making his way back to Sookie and almost _wished _he had stayed in bed that morning instead...

It was as though Eric was turned to stone in Sookie's doorway by the spellbinding sight that greeted him. Sookie was bending over, reaching for a solo cup of water, and she _still _wasn't wearing any underwear!

It wasn't a full-on flashing, but it afforded him a great view of her thighs, the bottom curvature of her naked ass cheeks, and just a _hint _of the treasure Eric often fantasized pillaging.

Before he had a chance to pick his jaw up off the floor, Sookie stood up and chugged the plastic cup full of water. She must have felt someone behind her and rotated around on her tip-toes, still sipping from the bright red cup.

She was _really _trying to rehydrate herself since some of the water she was gulping managed to slide past her lips and down her chin. This moment would have been Eric's go-to spank bank material from then to senior citizenship if it wasn't for the "kill me now" expression on her face. Yes, she had cleaned up considerably since she first burst through her door and into their traps, but she still looked miserable.

Eric took pity on her and offered her the capsules of pain relief. _He _was tempted to blush when she beamed up at him with gratitude. Her current cup of prank water wasn't enough to help her swallow the pills, so Sookie threw the empty plastic cup haphazardly over her shoulder before crouching down to pick up a new one. Eric, suddenly a gentleman, looked away as she continued to sit on her haunches and drink the ibu and water. The sight of her smooth, thick thighs was far too tempting for him.

"Need some help cleaning up?" Eric risked glancing at her over his shoulder, she was standing up, still cradling her skull in her hands.

"No way, I don't need to feel _guilty _whenever I teach you a lesson in pranks..ya know, sometime within the next couple Weeks..." she said in an ominous whisper.

"The thought never even crossed my mind." He smirked at her, but Sookie only shrugged in response.

Eric was thoroughly enjoying watching Sookie stumble around in hangover misery, especially because she was usually super happy and bright, _all _the time. It was comforting to see the woman who Eric considered ethereal appear to be so downright human!

He took it upon himself to start removing the sea of red Solo cups since she was still rubbing her temples. Each of the cups was only half-filled with water so Eric would consolidate the fluids, pouring out one cup into another and stacking the empty ones underneath those that were now full.

From the corner of his eye he watched Sookie deftly maneuver through the cups. She really was like Catherine Zeta Jones, silently tip toeing through danger...

She was trying to be sneaky while Eric was occupied picking up cups, doing her best to look inconspicuous while grabbing a pair of panties. She could feel herself blush as she pulled the lacey curtain around her bed to half-cover herself while stepping into her underwear.

Part of her wanted to skip the simple boyshorts and just crawl back into bed, but both ideas seemed impossible with Eric in her room. The guy was looking as beautiful as ever, with his bed-tussled hair, his body bending and reaching this way and that...without a shirt on! She needed some sort of barrier there to collect the moisture soon to cascade down her thighs and legs.

She blushed again thinking about the night before. The conversation still seemed a bit fuzzy to her, but she would never forget the feeling of Eric holding her hand, lying beside her until she fell asleep. It was possible Jas had only sent him in to make sure she was asleep for their prank, but it all felt too real; too comfortable sharing her bed with him. She really did hate sleeping alone.

Eric didn't miss Sookie struggling to pull her panties over her hips while hiding behind a curtain and had to turn his back on her to keep his cool.

Alcide walked in a few minutes later, arms up against her doorway as he asked if she needed any help, but Sookie could see he was already dressed for work and politely declined. Alcide raised his eyebrows to Eric before leaving, but the Viking chose to ignore him as he continued collecting cups.

"Oh! Alcide! Do you know what time it is?" Alcide took a step backwards in the hallway to answer her.

"Yeah, it's almost 11, why? You got somewhere to be this afternoon?" Sookie shook her head but kept her bright smile on her face.

"Nah, just makin' plans to feed everyone lunch, well, if they're here. Do you know if Claude will be around? Or does he have work too?"

"Aw, I think he'll miss lunch, too. Pretty sure he's got work around noon."

"Kay, thanks! I won't keep ya any longer. Looks like it'll just be me, Jas, and Eric! Have fun at work, Be safe!" Alcide fake saluted her as he walked away from the crime scene. As soon as she heard the front door close, Sookie sprinted through the cups (not spilling a drop of water) and mumbled out "Excuse me Eric, I'll Be Right Back!"

She had the best manners.

Eric continued to work on cups and saw Sookie _dash _past her doorway (both directions) multiple times. He was beginning to get a little curious, so he collected an armful of water cups and followed the sounds of Sookie in the kitchen. Just as he rounded the corner, he saw Sookie slam one of the higher kitchen cabinets closed and spun around to pose sexily/innocently against the counter. Her chest was heaving as she struggled to catch her breath and she had her "crazy Sookie" smile going on. Eric cocked an eyebrow and Sookie started laughing as she tip toed back to her room to finish cleaning up the Cuptastrophe!

8 minutes later, Eric and Sookie had gathered up the stockpile of cups and poured their contents down the kitchen sink. She used Jason and Alcide's towels to soak up the majority of water spillage (from the bucket and water-filled trash can) and hung them back on their respected racks in the bathroom. That'd be a fun surprise for them after a nice relaxing shower. She winked at Eric and he smiled and nodded in return.

Claude stepped into the bathroom, onto her little "moist towelette" prank and was sure to check his own towel before stepping cautiously into the shower. He eyed Sookie warily, but she just smiled innocently before checking on Jas and Eric chatting it up in the kitchen.

Jason was hosting his own Food Network show as he narrated what he was whipping up, how long he planned to cook it for, and the appropriate temp. for each dish while he worked circles around a wide-eyed Eric. Sookie couldn't help but giggle.

Since Jas seemed to have breakfast under control (even though it was more towards lunch time), Sookie fixed herself a giant mug of coffee and took a seat on one of the stools at the counter to have a great view of the action.

Eric's tall stature really was quite comical to see constantly standing in Jason's way. Finally, Jas gave up trying to sell Eric as his talented and Sexy assistant, twisting up then Whipping him in the ass with a dishcloth shouting: "If ya can't take the heat, then get on out my kitchen!"

Eric raised his arms up in the air, respectfully bowing out of Jason's hair, then took a seat next to Sookie. They grinned and playfully nudged one another with elbows, but neither dared to speak and interrupt Jason's 'Paula Dean' moment.

Claudine burst through the door dressed in a flashy halter top and tiny, frilly white skirt. She dropped her purse LOUDLY onto the wood floors and Shrieked with excitement seeing Jason wielding a spatula in the kitchen!

"JAAAS!"

"KARATE KID!" Jason threw down his spatula and raced over to sweep Claudine up in a hug. She was a good Foot taller than him, so he ended up locking his arms just under her ass so he could lift her up and spin her around.

Sookie stood up and winked a whole secret conversation to Eric as she took over Jason's forgotten meal. The pancakes were already finished, but she still needed to tend to his potatoes and sausage links.

Jason and Claudine began chatting a mile a minute, almost like long lost gal-pals because the first thing Jas mentioned was how long her hair had grown since the last time he visited. She teased him about his new fashion statement (Sookie's floral printed apron he was sporting), and Jas somehow managed to flip up the back of her skirt, leaving Claudine in a fit of high-pitched giggles. Had that been _Any _other man than Jason, she would have gone crouching tiger on his ass!

Eric sat back and sipped his coffee as he watched the two laugh and tease one another. He found himself slightly pissed off at Claudine for keeping the Stackhouse's to herself for all these years. He even went as far as to blame Claude for never giving Sookie a chance, since he knew OF her, but just assumed she'd be a self-absorbed twit like the Rest of Claudine's girlfriends... To be honest, Eric had met and/or slept with a lot of Claudine's friends, so he didn't have much faith upon meeting Sookie either.

Sook was plating what was left of Jason's meal for the group when Claudine and Jas got on the topic of how GREAT it was that Sookie had finally left Bill for good. Eric watched Sook carefully, and while the two Chatty Cathy's went on and on about it, Sookie's mouth would clench up, like she really _was _biting her tongue.

After finally having enough of them talking about her failure of a relationship Right in Front of her, Sookie slammed the tray of flapjacks onto the counter and opened her mouth to give them a piece of her mind -Only to be interrupted by the sound of a hair dryer going off, Immediately followed by a "WHAT THE FUCK?" from the bathroom.

Sookie's previously enraged face was replaced with a mischievous grin that made Eric's heart skip a beat. Sook grabbed plates and sauntered to their large dining room table, setting up breakfast for the crew.

"Real mature, _STACKHOUSE_!" Claude walked out of the hall with droplets of water dripping onto their floor. He was towel-clad and Sookie fought the muscles in her face to keep from laughing at his face.

She had loaded his blow dryer with all purpose flour and now it was caked onto his silky (wet) black hair as well as a large portion of his perfect face.

"Oh, Claude...did you do something new to your hair?" Sookie managed to keep a straight face, though Eric laughed out loud and attempted to cover it up with coughs.

"CLAUDE! I thought you had to go to work!" His sister rushed to his aide. "Didn't know you were going ANTIQUING today, HAHAHA!"

"Oh you girls are Too Fucking Funny, Ha, Ha, Ha..." Jason joined the party as he teased Claude about his now bloodshot eye. Claude then excused himself to shower _Again_, and everyone sat down to breakfast.

"So, what are we doing today?" Claudine asked while stealing a sausage link off Sookie's plate even though there was a tray full of cooked sausage in the center of the table.

"Um, nap? We all had a rough night last night, so I'm not really up for adventure right now." Claudine nodded as she tried to figure out something fun to do.

"Sunbathe on the roof?" Sookie caught Eric's eyes and immediately began blushing, damn eccentric bikini wax!

"You know I love the sun, but all that wine! I just need to hide in the shadows for a day, and I hate to say it after that prank, but I should definitely Rehydrate..."

"MMM! YES, GREAT IDEA!" she shouted with a mouth full of breakfast. "Let's try out that jacuzzi in the locker room! You'll let me borrow a suit, right Sookie?" Sook chewed her food but nodded a yes.

"Well y'all better not start without us! Eric and I might go grocery shopping after breakfast."

The chair Sookie was sitting in was an old-fashioned wooden office chair, so Eric, who was sitting next to her, surprised her as he wheeled her right up beside him.

"Why's he trying so hard to domesticate me?" He whispered into her ear, causing a delicious and completely involuntary shiver to run through her.

"He leaves in a couple days," she whispered back. "He just wants to make sure I'll be taken care of." She flashed Eric an apologetic smile.

"Ah, I see." He pushed Sookie's office chair away and shoveled another fork full of pancakes into his mouth, leaving syrup sliding down the side of his mouth. He was so garsh darned cute, Sookie couldn't resist...

She wheeled her chair forcefully back into Eric's, his arm absorbing most of the blow. Sookie first licked her thumb then used it to sweep up the stickiness off of Eric's face.

"He's my big brother. Old habits die hard." She smiled brightly and wheeled back to her own plate, leaving Eric with a goofy closed mouth grin.

Breakfast was delicious. Claude came out looking Spectacular as always before kissing his sister (and then Sookie) on the cheek, then Racing out the door to make it to "work" on time. Sookie still managed to shove a sausage link into his mouth before his departure. That Sookie...Always making sure the menfolk were fed.

The Stackhouse's had barely started to put away leftovers when Sookie's phone went off. She took a few steps away from everyone so it wouldn't seem _As _rude to answer the call, but it was still within range for the boys to listen in.

"Stan! Hey, how are you? ... ... Great, as a matter of fact! What can I do ya for? .. ... Oh! Well, tomorrow? uhhh.." Sookie looked apprehensive, held a hand up, and stared at Jason with uneasiness.

"I mean, suuuure? It's just, my brother's in town, BUT THAT'S OKAY! It's just dinner after all..." Eric's felt an uncomfortable lump in his throat. "Yea. Okay... Yep. 7:30. Yep. Sure, I'll text you the address. Okay, I'll see you then. Bye."

Sookie pressed End and didn't even notice her own grimace. She sighed and turned to her audience. When had Claudine slipped into the kitchen?

"So who's Stan?" She asked while crossing her arms in front of her chest. Claudine didn't look too happy.

"We work together, he's kinda been my friend for a while now." She studied her bare feet like they were the most interesting things in the world. "I ran into him at Eric's club, he suggested lunch, but now he called and asked me out on a Real date."

"I've never heard of him before. Stan..." Jason made a face as though saying his name left a funky aftertaste in his mouth.

"Well, yeah..I mean, why would I mention him, he's just a friend and all."

"Sook, you mention EVERY friend you have, because _anybody _that could stick around even though you were with Bill must have a heart of Gold!" Jason cast a wink to Claudine.

"Ughk, well what does it matter? Why can't y'all just be excited for me? I just got asked out on a date, a real date! Probably the first one since, well actually my first date _ever_!"

Sookie was smiling, but there was still a twinge of sadness lingering after her lack-of-dating confession. Eric couldn't even _imagine _anything more fucked up than the fact a beautiful person like Sookie had never been Properly Dated before!

A major part of him fucking hated Stan. He had met the guy and he was definitely nothing to write home about. Now that the dweeb had beaten him at becoming Sookie's first date, _somehow..? _Eric wanted nothing more than to kick his ass!

-Except-

He had already sworn to do whatever it'd take to make Sookie happy. Eric ran a hand through his lengthy blonde hair and sighed in frustration. Defeated, he closed the distance between them, slung his arm over her shoulders and kissed the top of her head.

"Congratulations, Sookie." She stared up at him, puzzled to say the least. He offered her a small smile before walking towards the hall.

"AND JUST WHERE DO YOU THINK YOU'RE GOING?" Claudine shouted as he walked.

"Someone's gotta fire up that Jacuzzi. Go put on a suit, _Claude_!" Sookie's Model-Friend stuck her tongue out at the back of Eric's head and Jason tried to catch up with the giant Swede.

Eric turned on the jets and walked back to his room to retrieve decent hot tub attire for him and Jason. Once they were safely away from the women, Jason practically slammed the bedroom door closed behind them.

"Well THAT went well! What the fuck, Eric! You just gave her your _blessing _to go on a date with some asshole!" Eric shrugged.

"You've never met the guy..."

"Sounds like you did. So, was he? Was he an asshole?"

"No, Jason. Not an asshole. Total fucking sweetheart. I'm not sure what all she sees in him, I'm not even fucking sure what our _Bouncer _saw I'm him to let the guy in."

"Fuck! See! Well, why didn't you say something to her? Shoulda put your foot down while you had the chance!"

"Ok, I'm not saying this to be a dick, but _Forbidding _Sookie from seeing someone, it's sort of your thing, and how well has that worked out for you?" Jason scowled and walked to the other side of Eric's room to put on his borrowed swim trunks.

It was sort of weird, after his heart to heart with Jason Stackhouse last night, Eric had assumed he had outgrown his protective older brother habits, but now Jas was pacing around the room like he was ready to crack a few skulls. This only confused Eric more...

Why was he trying so hard to help Eric out? Why didn't he threaten to kick his ass for even _Thinking _about his baby sister? Why was Jason all bent out of shape over a nerd co-worker while standing in Eric's corner? Eric. The guy who has _never _been in a serious relationship before...

"Besides," Eric called out across the room, "_you _were the one who suggested I Don't pursue her..."

"Yeah yeah. Come on, maybe we can eavesdrop and shit."

Jason turned the doorknob sloooowly, as not to make any sound. He crept silently down the hall, his back and palms to the wall, carefully crossing one foot over the other until he edged up to the locker room entrance. He held a fist up, signaling for Eric to hold his position.

Eric held his breath to keep from laughing at Jason's stupid stealth maneuvers. It was so much easier to imagine him and Sookie playing ninjas now! He could hear the women taking in the echoey bath and quickly snuck up next to Jason to hear what they were talking about.

He knew he looked like an idiot. Something about Jason (and Sookie, for that matter) brought out this childishness about him. Eric hadn't felt so immature since...

"Come on! I thought you'd be _Happy_! What happened to that whole "best way to get over a man is to get under a new one" speech?"

"I stand by that! But Sookie, this is your _Freedom _Fuck! Do you really wanna waste it on _Stan_..?"

"Well, yeah. I mean, I guess?" she mumbled unconvincingly. There was a pause before Sookie started again defensively. "Yeah! I'mma tap that like a Maple Tree!" Claudine laughed.

Jason had paled significantly and leaned to whisper to Eric.

"Well, I _thought _I'd be able to listen to this shit, but I was wrong." He moved past Eric but gave him a couple pats on the shoulder for good luck (with the eavesdropping?) before retreating back to Eric's bedroom. The Viking shrugged.

"Sookie, Stan is not the man for the job. You know that If you sleep with him he's going to expect the world out of you! He'll probably call his mom DURING and let her know you're moving in with them!" Sookie's laughter bounced off the bathroom walls.

"_Ughhh_, I know you're right, it's just...Bill's the only man I've ever been with. Stan just screams **Safe**. I know he'd Never laugh seeing me naked."

"Yeah, because Stan would Jizz in his pants just from seeing you Topless! Naked, he'd probably pass the fuck out!" They both laughed and Eric could hear water splashing as they moved about the jacuzzi.

"Sookie, sweetie, you've Only been with Bill. If memory serves, Bill didn't even ring your bell! This fantastic opportunity just fell into your lap, and you've just gotta take it, and run with it!

You see, your freedom fuck is supposed to be _amazing _and _crazy_! It should be with someone whose body just calls out to you, _begging _you to do the dirtiest things you can imagine in the craziest positions you can bend into! It should be with someone you dare only _dream _about fucking, not someone..._safe_.

Does Stan get your blood pumping? Do you wanna _rip _his clothes off and taste every inch of him?" Sookie still didn't answer. "Fuck! Have you at least imagined him naked?"

"Claudine, he's a really nice guy."

"That's a **terrible **reason to sleep with someone! Sookie Stackhouse! This is your freedom fuck, I wanna be cheering you on with my Mel Gibson blue face paint, and if Stan is the Geek I saw sitting with you at the bar, I just don't think I can do that for you!

You've fucked the same "average" sized Dick for years, the same _boring _positions, even at scheduled times during the week! You deserve GREAT sex! MULTIPLE-orgasms! That guy looks like his arms will shake just holding his own body weight up while you're going at it! Please trust me, you CAN do so better for your first rodeo."

"Okay, I get what you're saying. It's just, he's interested, so I don't have to fear rejection. And, well. It's sort of something the guys said last night. It's just, I'm so out of practice! The way I see it, Stan might be the _only _guy out there who won't get hung up the fact I might be a bad lay."

"WHAT?"

"That reminds me, do you think we can go shopping later, maybe for lingerie?"

"What the _fuck _did you just say to me, Sookie Stackhouse?"

"I'm sorry! I can't help but think maybe it's something I did in bed, or _Didn't _do that made Bill look elsewhere. Maybe I just wasn't Exciting enough, or adventurous, maybe?"

Eric could not believe his ears. He hadn't taken in breath in God knows how long, trying not to miss a single second of their conversation.

"Sookie, listen to me. Bill cheated on you because he's an idiot and a douche, NOT because you're bad in bed."

Eric heard sniffles and could only assume Sookie was about to cry. He had heard enough. He hated Stan and was regretting letting Bill off with just a warning instead of thoroughly beating his ass, but hearing Sookie cry was something he simply could not stand.

"_Ladies_, your entertainment had arrived..."

Eric kicked one leg out into the doorway and pointed his toe. He flexed his calf muscle and teased the women with a view of just his tantalizing leg.

Claudine could catcall like a construction worker, and Sookie's professional whistling encouraged Eric to bound towards the hottub, leaping in, (landing mostly on Sookie's lap) and splashing a large amount of the steamy water out of the jacuzzi.

Jason must have heard their screams and giggles since he jumped in next, getting nice and cozy on _Eric's _lap while the girls laughed.

"So what's with the Karate Kid thing?" Eric asked, trying to avoid the topic of Sookie's first date with Stan. He still wasn't exactly sure how that was even possible since she had been with Bill, after all.

"Claudine's a mixed martial artist," Sookie chimed in.

"What?" Everyone shared a laugh at Eric's expense.

"Nah, that's just my nickname for her. Ya know how the Karate Kid beats that Cobra asshole with a Crane-style kick? Well, the first night I ever got with Claudine, she kicked the _shit _out of me in her sleep. The name just fit."

The group carried on sharing stories for a few minutes before Sookie stood up in the water. Eric felt drool building up in his mouth and slowly swallowed it all up in one unsubtle gulp.

Sookie Stackhouse is a fucking goddess.

Since he first stepped into the bubbling jacuzzi, Eric had been fighting off his instincts to stare at her exquisite breasts as they attempted to escape the small confines of her shimmering, royal blue bikini top. It was impossible to avoid now. Gravity did it's finest work, drawing droplets of water down every delectable inch of her. This scene was a million times better than running into Sookie after her shower.

"This hottub requires beer. I'll be right back."

He was 100% sure that his mouth was hanging wide open and he barely reacted to Jason's punch to his shoulder. Eric refused to blink as she moved past him, rising from the bubbly water. There was no doubt in his mind that his ancestors would have killed one another for a chance to claim a woman as perfect as Sookie.

She moved quickly, so Eric did his best to memorize every inch of her now that he had her so close. For the life of him, he couldn't remember seeing such a natural looking tan on a woman, there was no orange to be found on Sookie, no sir. He grew painfully hard as he mentally made plans to do sinfully depraved things to different parts of her body, including that belly button!

Eric clenched his jaw as she climbed out of the tub. Every molecule in his body wanted him to turn around to watch her bikini-clad ass jiggle as she walked out of the bathroom and out into the hall.

He slowly let out the breath he had been holding, glanced at Claudine and Jason, and smirked in response to their knowing looks. The two began whispering to one another so Eric stretched his arms out against his lone side of the tub.

They heard Sookie coming towards them, the glass beer bottles clanging together as she walked. Eric leaned his head back to look at her and she smiled sweetly down to him, handing him the first beer. It was already opened and everything! Eric couldn't help thinking how he could get used to a beautiful, curvy woman (squeezed into a small bikini), delivering him ice cold beers.

Sookie proceeded to open and disperse the other three beers before stepping back into the jacuzzi, taking her seat next to Eric.

"So what's new back in Bon Temps brother?"

"Um, it's Bon Temps? Nothing exciting has happened since that time Hoyt's above ground swimmin' pool burnt down."

"I still can't wrap my mind around that one." Sookie shook her head and sipped from her beer. "How is Hoyt? Come on, what have y'all gotten up to? Lay it on me. What's the scuttlebutt?" Jay laughed into his beer bottle.

"Well, just last week, me, catfish, Hoyt, and Kevin headed over to Rene's place. He got one them fancy compound bows? So we're just shooting at random shit in the wilderness, but still sort of towards the Road. So this girl starts walking down the road and the guys keep on shooting! I mean, they weren't aiming at her or nothing, but shit, accidents happen!"

"Did she get hurt?" Claudine asks in a concerned whisper.

"Naw, just gave me a fright is all." Jason took another swig of beer.

"You should have wrote her a message, shot it over by arrow. She opens it, it just says "RUN.", hahaha!"

How could you not love a girl like Sookie? Any normal girl would have been embarrassed that her brother was telling white-trashy stories in front of her professional model best friend. Then again, Sookie's not your average girl.

"I could probably shoot a bow and arrow," Claudine shrugged. Jason and Sookie looked at one another for a spell and then started laughing in her face.

"Aww, sweetie. No. I don't even think you could pull the string back. There's a lot of resistance there." Claudine huffed at her friend.

"Pft, how are you so sure? I am tougher than I look! AND, I go to the gym regularly!"

"Yeah, and using the elliptical for an hour won't help that much.." Jason cracked up at Sookie's joke.

"Hey! I'm really strong! I'm Serious!" Sook dove across the tub to her friend, grasping her bicep.

"Daaayum! Maybe you could, Claudine! Who invited THUNDER," then she squeezed her other arm, "and LIGHTENING to the party?"

Everyone laughed as the girls splashed one another.

Maybe Eric was just paranoid, but he felt like everyone was watching him a little too closely. Like they were grinning and laughing at him. Maybe. One thing was certain, they were all acting weird.

"Sook, be a doll, and fetch your brother another beer, would ya?" Jason's tone was playful, but Sookie's eyes narrowed.

"Jason Stackhouse, you are a guest in our home (Eric loved it whenever she'd call it our), but if you need another beer, you can get up off your LAZY, G-"

"I'll get it," Eric interrupted, "anyone else need another?" The Stackhouse siblings were stunned silent, and Claudine was all smiles.

Eric lugged his giant limbs out of the jacuzzi and reached for a towel to half dry himself before trekking water throughout the apartment. He caught something different as he passed his reflection in the bathroom mirror, and then stopped to do a double take.

HIS LIPS WERE BLUE!

"The..fuck?" Everyone started to jump out of the water, laughing hysterically at Eric.

"It's just food coloring, it'll wash off in a day!"

"Where did you- we don't even own food coloring!"

"Aww, sweetie, I teach second grade.." Sookie was slowly trying to inch her way towards the door. Eric reached for his beer bottle to inspect the top.

"I look like I've just blown a SMURF!" Sookie started to cackle as she ran away from him. He brushed his lips against the bottle once more before chasing after her.

He caught up to her quickly, what with his long legs and her bare feet slipping in the water dripping freely down her body.

He brought her down swiftly (yet gently) to the hallway floor, his arms encircling her frame, his knees and elbows trapping her against the wood. She gasped as their eyes met, almost fearful of his playful smile, and then he began to plant tickling kisses against her neck! Sookie grunted through her laughter as he noisily worked his mouth over her collarbones and the top of her chest.

She was laughing so hard she could barely breathe, even though there was nothing funny about the situation. He held her body so tightly against him that Sookie became overwhelmed by his sent, the feel of his breath against her moist skin, not to mention the goose bumps that arose from the feel of his warm mouth!

Every swipe of his expert tongue would make her shiver, every nip from his teeth would make her arch against him, and every time he'd suck her flesh briefly into his mouth her eyes would roll back into her skull.

Thank God he couldn't reach her breasts from the angle he was holding her. She was barely holding it together as it was!

Yet somehow Eric would continue making his playful little growls, so Sookie continued to laugh and squirm.

Her attempts to kick only made things worse, much worse. The way she was pinned, every kicked only made her thighs rub against each other. Her heart was racing and luckily the hot tub water camouflaged her thoroughly soaked bikini bottoms.

She couldn't remember the last time she had felt so excited! Hell, she wasn't exactly sure she had ever wanted anyone as bad as she wanted Eric at that moment.

And then it happened..

Eric endeavored to plant a sloppy, food-colored kiss on her cheek, but through her struggles, he ended up kissing the corner of her delicious mouth.

They both froze.

Sookie stared into his ice blue eyes (and down to his lips of blue, too), watching them glaze over with a lust she had never known.

Eric looked down at a wide eyed Sookie, her ample chest heaving as she panted in his arms.

He only hesitated for her sake, fearing she would only run away and pretend none of this had ever happened. In reality, Sookie was ready to give him anything he wanted. she had never felt so alive!

Maybe it was because of Claudine's pep-talk, but for the life of her, she couldn't think of a single reason Eric shouldn't be her freedom fuck...

Shit, they live together. That's right.

Through their fog of sexual tension came two disembodied voices from down the hall.

"Come on karate kid, take a shower with me."

"Why? Jas, we were just in the tub! There's no chlorine in it."

"Yeah, but, I mean. It's dirty." long pause. "I peed in it..?"

Sookie and Eric burst out laughing. She stared fondly at his bobbing Adams apple before he leaned forward to place a final kiss on her forehead.

"Maybe you should get together a load of laundry for me, Sookie. I'll be in the kitchen, trying to wash this shit off my lips."

Eric disentangled himself from her warm, wet body and awkwardly helped her up. She still seemed dazed and it took her a moment to snap out of it and walk towards her room.

After scrubbing at the blue with scalding hot water, Eric decided to check on the status of Sookie's dirty clothes. Maybe if Jason Stackhouse could see him in action (washing, drying, folding), he'd find him domesticated enough to forgo the grocery shopping.

He stopped just before entering her room, her door was ajar and she was speaking with somebody. He leaned over to get a better view inside, even though the last time he had done this he ended up storming out of the building...

Sookie was on the phone, pacing back and forth in her bikini. Eric smiled at all the light specks of blue adorning her neck and chest. She turned to face her window and Eric spotted a tattoo barely peeking out atop her bikini bottom. So, Sookie Stackhouse has a tramp stamp! He smirked at his new discovery then strained his ears to listen to her conversion.

"Stan, uh-huh. I'm sorry I won't be available tomorrow after all. Yeah. Well, it's been years since I've seen him last, and he did fly all the way over from Louisiana..."

This day just kept getting better and better.

Eric strut past the bathroom and heard Jason and Claudine giggling as they shut off the shower, but Jas wasn't laughing for long.

"OH, WHAT THE FUCK HAPPENED TO MY TOWEL?"

* * *

><p>NEXT CHAPTER IS THE WEDDING.. and what you've all REALLY been waiting for! mwahahahah!<p> 


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